It does not matter that the extra-marital affair was simply a fling; what the betrayed spouse sees is the unfaithfulness. The marriage may be rocky as it is, and an illicit affair only reinforces the unstable nature of the union leading to a permanent rupture.
Far too many people ignore the facts and figures about marriage and think for some reason that their relationship has the anecdote to divorce. In most cases they are wrong.
You are sitting having coffee with your best friend, enjoying your latte when she say’s, “You know the guy we had fix our fence and do our landscaping last year? Well, I slept with him yesterday!”
When two people get married, suddenly nearly every decision is made by the metaphorical two heads instead of one. And this doesn’t necessarily mean that one person in the households opinion is more worthy than the others.
You go to bed. And then you are awoken, or unable to sleep because the person next to you is snoring. So you nudge. And you kick. You might even pinch their nose closed for a few minutes to try and shake them out of their snoring fit.
On the mantel is a beautiful picture of mom, dad, the son, the daughter and the family mutt… all smiling, looking so happy. The reality is mom and dad sleep in separate rooms, they never kiss, never hold hands.
According to research, one in five couples regrets their marriage within the first year of holy matrimony. Of this 20% of married folk who regret their marriage, around 54% of them will eventually divorce. Even more interesting is that of the 20% of couples who regret getting married in the first year after vows, more than half of them are women.
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Robert Buchicchio (MSW, LICSW, DCSW has a BA in psychology from University of Rhode Island and an MSW from Ohio State University.
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When marriages go bad
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