We all have an area of our life where we want to experience change? Whether you want to find new love, get physically fit, change careers, move to a new home or learn a new skill, there are three simple steps you can follow that will absolutely guarantee new results!
Shift Your Perspective
At any given moment we are either looking at life through the lens of fear or love. Wherever you are not experiencing life the way you want is being viewed through fear. Want more money? You are afraid of not having enough? What to find true love? You are afraid of being alone. Want to lose weight? You are afraid you won’t.
That’s ok. Right now, shift your perspective.
What are you excited to do with more money? What are all the ways you love YOU? What are all the fun things you are going to do with your new love? Do those now. Focus on all the fun things you are going to do with your new energy and strength when you lose the weight. Fall in love with getting to change your diet or to meet new people at the gym, the beach, etc.
On another note, has life been super challenging in certain areas where you desire change? Maybe you have experienced depression, abuse, addiction or poverty. Because of your past, you (understandably) do not believe what you desire is available to you. You are afraid life can’t change, that you are not worthy or don’t have what “it” takes. Again, shift your perspective from fear to love.
This isn’t necessarily easy, AND it is available to you. How do you appreciate the happy moments now because you know what it is like to feel so low? How are you more compassionate with others because you know the feeling of helplessness. How are you stronger for overcoming your addictions? What have you learned about yourself as a result of enduring and surviving your past experiences?
We learn best through contrast. You have gotten to experience one “side of the coin” so that you can now experience the other.
Shift your perspective from fear to love and change has to begin.
Stay Open to Possibility
It is very common to take our experiences up until now and decide change is not available to us.
We label. We seal up our stories in a box and nail the lid shut. This is how I am. This is how my brain works. I am not good at this. I can’t do that. Done. Finished. We leave no opening for change.
Again, it’s your choice and you can do whatever you want. Is that what you want?
Here are three magical words that can open any “box,” no matter how completely the lid has been nailed shut.
“Up until now….”
“Up until now… I have not felt this change is available to me.”
“Up until now…I have not experienced success in this area.”
Imagine if your 2-year-old self decided that you could not ever learn to walk. You had stood up and fallen down so many times. What did you do? Your little self had yet to learn labels or limitation. You kept trying. All you knew was that you wanted to walk. The desire was there and that was enough for you. Ultimately, you walked.
What changed? You started believing what you observed, heard…what you were told. You got into your head. Things became logical. You needed proof. Logic took over your heart.
If the desire for change is there, it is possible. Get curious.
“I don’t know how this is going to change AND I am super curious about how this will happen.”
“I wonder how I am going to… find the money, get the courage, meet the person, find the new job, lose the weight…?”
No matter what your experience has been up until now, there is always the possibility for change.
Take Steps Towards What You Want NOW
Now that you are looking at the change you desire from a place of love and are open to all the ways this change can happen, it is time to simply take one step towards this future vision now.
What is one itty bitty thing you can do now that is in alignment with the change you want to experience? Stay in the moment. Often we project ahead to our desired destination from where and judge the distance to be too far away. We get overwhelmed and decide it is not available to us.
It would be like wanting to hike a mountain peak to see the view and, while we are still in the foothills, try to understand what every part of the path will look like, if we will be tired, get a blister, etc. So we stop because the length of the journey contains too many unknowns. All we really need to do in that moment is take one step forward.
Right now, what action can you take that is pointed in the direction of the change you want to experience?
In my work with clients I use the canvas as the self-awareness modality. We want to paint a “masterpiece” and since we have never painted a “masterpiece” we never even start painting. We believe we don’t know how to draw, paint shadows, paint faces, etc. instead of just taking the easiest action in the moment.
The first step is always just to paint. Make a mark, then another and another. Allow yourself to stay present and keep making your mark. One brush stroke at a time, you will find yourself standing back to witness your masterpiece.
We all get stuck. That’s ok. The only question for you now is, “What do you want?” Follow these three steps and you will get there. Enjoy the journey!