A Mother’s Instinct – Moms Just Know

a mother and her son

If you’ve ever watched an animal give birth, you’ve no doubt witnessed the amazing, matronly experience of a mother’s instinct at work. A dog will give birth to numerous pups and will somehow know, on a deep level, if one is unwell. She will push it aside and almost hide it from the others in the event that it is sick. As she protects the healthy puppies, she draws on an instinctive sense that the one won’t survive. It’s painful to watch her leave it in the embryonic sac, and even human intervention can’t force her to nurture it. As heartbreaking as it is, it’s undeniable proof that a mother’s instinct exists in all creatures on Earth.

The Power of a Mother’s Instinct

For humans, a mother’s unique and individualized instinct is often a force to reckon with. When a woman becomes a mother, she taps into a psychic, connected power that enables her to understand the intricate details of another human being. In a society so advanced, the instinctive qualities of a mother are still often overlooked or dismissed as excessive worry or paranoia. Imagine bringing your baby to the doctor. No fever, no wounds, no illness that can be diagnosed. But as a mother, you just know something is wrong. It might be written off as colic or another common infant problem—but still, at night, you lie awake with a nagging sense that something isn’t quite right. Eventually, you’re proven correct.

Try as modern medicine or science might to explain the phenomena of instinct, there are no words or definitions that can fully capture it. It is just something—much like the silence that comes with snow—that exists beyond all else. Millions of mothers, from all levels of education and walks of life, can be in one place and somehow feel the pain or suffering of their child. It’s evident when you lay eyes on your child hours before a fever comes on and know they’re sick. Take them to the doctor, and you’ll be sent home until the symptoms appear. But you know already. As mothers gain experience, they become even more adept at identifying what ails their children or what makes them happy—often better than anyone else, including the child.

Perhaps it’s because giving birth to a creature who lives inside our womb for so long allows us to forge a deep, lasting connection to their innate side. Maybe it’s because mothers feel such an overwhelming love for their children that it transcends language and traditional methods of communication. Or perhaps it’s a shared energy. Most likely, a mother’s instinct will never be fully explained!

In an age where people are inundated with easy access to knowledge and information, it seems fitting that the explanation of a mother’s instinct remains vague. The longer we have our children, the more proficient we become at using this instinct. We know when they’re lying long before they do. We can hear the angry conversation between our child and a friend and almost feel the heartbreak ourselves. Are we drawing from our own experiences, or is the instinct a real evaluation of the connection between mother and child?

A mother’s instinct isn’t just reserved for times of strife or illness. There comes a point in most women’s lives when they naturally gravitate toward the warm, cuddly infants they see in public. For many, this love of nurturing life starts with a kitten or puppy and grows into an undeniable urge to have children. The instinct allows a mother to know, without asking or researching, exactly how to take care of a fever or get a fussy baby to sleep. While dads may look on, baffled about which way the diaper goes on, women seem to know these things automatically from the very beginning.

The whole nesting phenomenon that happens in the later stages of pregnancy is another instinctive quality that defies explanation. Even a woman who has lived in chaos her whole life will suddenly wake up one morning with a drive to organize and clean. She’ll acquire the ability to make a bed feel perfectly comfortable and fold clothes and tiny socks so precisely that they seem undisturbable. When the baby comes, a mother’s body is taken over by instinct, allowing her to defy pain and suffering in her first attempt to nurture life. It’s an amazing thing to witness and an even more dramatic thing to experience.

People often say the most dangerous place to stand is between a mother and her child. A mother’s instinct can turn a perfectly sane woman into an erratic, hysterical fighter with superhuman strength and ability. Mothers can do anything to protect or provide for their children, often against all odds, all while maintaining a silent river of emotion that runs smoothly between them and their child.

Many women are asked, advised, or encouraged to dismiss their deepest and most troubling thoughts when it comes to their children. There are countless books that explain every aspect of child-rearing and offer anecdotes to solve any problem a mother may face. Yet many moms eventually find that their innermost feelings—the ones they rarely share with others—turn out to be right. A mother’s instinct is a compass that helps keep her child safe and allows her to protect, love, and nurture in a way that no one else can. Women should be encouraged more to listen to their instincts and act on them, more than relying on conventional advice from pediatricians or modern literature.

Probably one of the most endearing qualities of a mother’s instinct is that it often extends beyond her own children to others in need. Just like a dog who takes on orphaned kittens or a cow that lets an orphaned calf nurse, motherhood isn’t just about having kids—it’s about taking care of, loving, and nurturing life in a way only a mother can.

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3 Responses

  1. Beautiful post. Thank you. I resonate with the message that he mother instinct might be something of shared energy.
    I had been raised by narcissistic mother. I had not experienced the loving, caring mother instinct. Thus, I appreciated hugely being explained what a good mothering can look like. I had experienced the power-abuse by the “instinct”. I wonder if the mother that decides to down-mother uses the same instinct as the “good mothering” does. She steps into this instinct, originally be here in order to protect and provide the child. She uses it for the opposite: to tune into when the child feels pain and distress and neglect it or create situations when the child suffers more. I have the impression that my mother learned through her life how to harm me, misusing the mothering. I have seen no animal doing it, so far no single one. In the pathological use of the maternal instinct, I had observed that my mother did not need to learn it anywhere. She had no books on manipulation etc. for her disposition. She had been abused herself, but I guess by far not that badly as I was. She just knew how to make me feel threatened and not safe, how to put me in distress and keep me there.
    It feels like that she had grown buttons to press me down. She figured out my weak spots already in a baby-time. I have the impression that my mother listens very well to her instincts. She had discovered already in my baby-time that I can be put down by bad health care and abuse in health care (Munchausen Proxy Syndrom)…it harms me more than anybody else. I break down from the unethical or no social, public care. I also wanted to learn a lot, my brain was fast. She managed to get me to schools with very less-intelligent people. I thrive so bad among these people, who addictipnally abused me verbally for being “too much”. My mother mainly focused on these areas. She also tried to put down my body image in an excessive way (telling me I was fat sack or a skeleton, tearing my hair out of my head)…but these stuff did not work so well with me, I did not care that much as for the others. Maybe I am wrong and my understanding will arrive. Maybe my mother´s instinct got it right.
    How come that these creatures became and kept the mothering role ?
    I had never had anybody who would step between me and her (the opposite, society was pushing me into her lap. Particulary the pediatricians were helping her to break me down, in the serious of my health care system unnecessary odyssea-through unnecessary operations, without anaeasthesia, toxic nourishment when I was not breastfeeded, making handicaping comments about my heart function and being a neurotic with high blood pressure or a child with such a back scoliosis and asymmetrical chest and many others, my mother left happy with the doctors, she had another argument to put me down at home ).
    I admire the mothers who come to the children doctors in order to sake help (which should be normal) for their child and use more the instinct to help the child. I have experienced it vice-versa.

    I can imagine that she would try to destroy the person that would have the courage to step between her and me ( in my adult life, it showed up that this person could be a potential romantic partner, good teacher, good job, employee, psychotherapist or just a good friend).
    I am sorry that the society did not protect me. Althought, it was very difficult for people -who did not care: mother played the sacrificing saint mother who´s only concern is her child´s well-being.
    I even moved to different countries in my early adulthood. Anyway, her instinct figured out how to get me back and keep her with her (against my will). Her instinct is very inventive and powerful (she even visited some psychiatrist in order to make me mentally ill and keep me with her, behind my back).
    Her instinct gives death and destroys/this is perhaps she plays the perfect caring mothering in her external life.

    I´d wish the break this pathological instinct in this monster-mothering and break free from her.
    I would wish that she would have not have this instinct, this power over me.
    It cannot be that she uses the life instinct to destroy others, particulry the child that she gave that power over by “nature of biology”.
    I´d wish some help with it.

    1. Stop caring for her, realize that would she does it unacceptable. Your mother sounds extremely toxic, you need to get away from her. The reason she has power is because you care for her, because you’re probably kind hearted but you should let her go. This person is an energy vampire, you can’t change or improve her. I hope that you can find peace, forgive her and move on.

  2. Beautiful courageous way to express yourself. I have a strong instinct about my child, my son and I are going through life with out each other. There is a darkness that lightens within me, I feel that he is abused by his son’s family. I’ve called the authorities, and CPS, they didn’t do anything. I need advice.
    Sincerely
    Jennifer Zeober

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