Are they Here Yet Mommy – Do Road Trips Drive you Nuts

Kids in the car

Whoever said kids could be annoying didn’t know the half of it. Kids are annoying, and with each birthday, they tend to get more so. Most parents can’t wait until their child learns to talk. But be warned: there will come a day when you will wish they never learned. For just a moment, you’ll long for those quiet days of babbles and smiles.

The trait of children driving you crazy is no more pronounced than when they are waiting for something. For instance, if you’ve planned a birthday party or a play date or have family coming to visit, your kids will constantly be chanting, “Are they here yet?” Meanwhile, you’re trying to get the house picked up in a hurry, making sure there’s no dirty underwear in the couch cushions. Your kids are following you around like a broken record, asking, “Are they here yet?” At some point, you may wonder if your child is really that bright, because if they were here, they would certainly know it. No car has pulled up. The dogs aren’t barking. No knock at the door. No doorbell. And all your child can say is, “Are they here yet?”

Managing Kids’ Impatience

This scenario also plays out every time you get in the car to go somewhere with your children. The movie Are We There Yet got its name for good reason. You get the car packed, fill up the gas tank, and before you even get on the interstate, your kids are asking if they’re there yet (wherever there may be). Ummm, no. You’re still on your street or in your town, yet the kids somehow think your car has magically transformed into the Magic School Bus, whisking them off to Disney World in the blink of an eye. Or that you’ll get them to Grandma’s in five minutes instead of five hours. As each hour passes, the question “Are we there yet?” becomes more and more grating. So much so, that you begin to reconsider ever leaving home with the kids again — or at least looking at the ravine as a great alternative to being pecked to death by the kids.

Obviously, kids have a hard time withholding their excitement. They also don’t tend to have much patience for waiting. Kids are self-oriented, which means they think of nothing else but what they want or need. When this innate selfishness is combined with impatience, you have a recipe for parental stress, regardless of the circumstances. So, is there anything you can do?

Experts say there is. The first step in curbing a child’s impatience is to set realistic expectations. Just because you start preparing for guests hours in advance doesn’t mean your kids need to. For young children, you can do practical things like setting a timer or an alarm clock to alert them when it’s almost time for their friends or family to arrive, or when it’s time to get ready for the birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese. You should also give them something to do so they won’t spend all their time annoying the you-know-what out of you. If you have family coming over, have the kids work on decorations in a secluded part of the house or sit by the window, coloring placemats, so they can feel like they’re helping. Tasks like these will keep their minds off the clock. They’ll still be impatient, but less so.

The same is true for trips in the car. With all the technology today, parents can keep kids entertained for hours. If you expect your kids to sit still and patient for the entire drive, you might want to leave in the middle of the night when they’re likely to sleep. Otherwise, bring movies, video games, and find interesting car games to play along the way. The license plate game was invented for a reason! The busier your kids are, the less they’ll irritate you. If they keep asking if you’re there yet, try to make the trip fun for them.

Remember, it’s your responsibility as a parent to teach children patience. Patience is not an innate trait. It’s common for parents to overreact and yell at their kids because they’re so exasperated by the constant questions. Try not to do that, though, as it will only deflate their excitement and leave you feeling guilty.

Also, make sure to talk to your kids about time. Kids don’t really understand how long six hours are. So, if you’re going on a road trip or have something going on in six hours, give them a real-life example of how long that is. Giving them a watch or timer helps reduce the need for them to ask the same annoying question over and over again, and it gives them a sense of control over the situation.

Also, keep in mind that their impatience and excitement can lead to a meltdown — especially if you give in to frustration. The calmer you remain, the calmer your kid will be, and the less annoying they’ll be as well. And remember, this too shall pass. Once the guests arrive or you finally reach your destination, the “Are we there yet?” / “Are they here yet?” chorus will come to a screeching halt. (Hallelujah!)

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