Perhaps you and your husband have been married for just over a year, and you’re both eager to start a family. You’re wondering when the best time is to start trying. Is there ever truly an ideal moment? Many of your friends already have children, and you’re feeling the urge to begin sooner rather than later. Plus, your parents keep dropping not-so-subtle hints that they’re ready to be grandparents. But are you ready to have kids?
This question weighs on the minds of many new couples. You’re already ahead of the curve because you both agree that you want children! As simple as this may seem, not all couples share the same views on parenthood. You might be thinking, “Why would someone marry a person with different feelings about having children?” Believe it or not, it happens!
Since you both know you want children eventually, the next question is: when? While many will say there’s never a “perfect” time to have kids, what if I told you there is? The best time to have children is when you’re both ready! Though this may sound overly simplistic, you and your partner may not reach this decision at the same time.
Key Considerations for Parenthood
Without knowing the specifics of your relationship—such as how long you’ve known each other before marriage—my advice isn’t one-size-fits-all. That said, here are some general factors to consider when deciding if you’re truly ready to become parents:
- Is your relationship solid? Do you truly know each other? If not, use the early years of marriage to deepen your bond and enjoy each other’s company. Once a baby arrives, that time becomes harder to reclaim.
- Are you financially prepared? Parenting is wonderful but expensive. From household costs to childcare, schooling, and medical bills, expenses add up quickly. Ensure you’re ready to take on this financial responsibility.
- Are you mentally and emotionally ready? Are you prepared to share your life with a human being who will be completely dependent on you? It’s okay to admit if you’re not ready for this level of commitment.
- Are you physically ready? This is where preconception counseling comes in. Women can visit their OB-GYN to ensure they’re in optimal health for a healthy pregnancy. This visit addresses concerns like high blood pressure, diabetes, or weight, and considers family medical history that might affect pregnancy.
Parenting is a remarkable journey—an experience like no other. It transforms you and often becomes the greatest thing to ever happen to you. While this holds true for many, ensure you’re certain before taking the leap. Once you have children, there’s no turning back.
