Sleep is the foundation for how we feel and function. Many with ADHD know this the hard way. Unfortunately, sleep deprivation makes you even more distracted and forgetful the next day which can make it harder to get into bed on time. It can feel like a hopeless catch-22.

Procrastination and inefficiencies during the day can push tasks later into the night and thereby push sleep along with it. You may also find it easier to get stuff done when the world quiets down and you can work uninterrupted.

Or you lose track of time or feel like it’s finally your chance to do what you want. Those with ADHD tend to be night owls, so it can feel impossible to quiet your mind enough to fall asleep even when you do get into bed on time.

Better Nights Make Better Days

Sleep may feel elusive, but it’s worth investing in. Even just getting an extra half hour will make a difference tomorrow.

1. Commit to a Real Bedtime. Morning problems are often night problems. If you have trouble getting up in the morning or getting out the door on time, the first culprit to consider is when you went to bed. If your brain isn’t fully recharged, then the first cost of staying up too late is a foggier, more rushed morning. Plus, it may also slide your whole day later so it’s harder to get into bed on time tonight. Be intentional about what you do with your evening time. Having a real bedtime, not just a loose suggestion, adds some deadline pressure to your night. If you say that sleep is a priority, then that means other activities get cut once it gets too late.

2. Get More Done During the Day. Stealing from sleep can feel like the only way to get it all in, but it isn’t sustainable. Night problems are often day problems, so focus on getting more done earlier. This may involve managing your ADHD better so that you can use time more efficiently. This may also mean taking a hard look at everything on your plate and trimming some back. If you feel like you’re too often disappointing people, you may worry that you can’t say no, but it’s much better to commit to less and complete more of it. A more peaceful day also makes it easier to fall asleep.

3. Get into Bed Together. If your romantic partner goes to bed close to your desired bedtime, then make a commitment to go to bed when they do. This also means resisting the temptation to do just one more thing because one easily becomes five. This shared goal not only makes it more likely that you will stick to the plan, but it also gives you some important time together. Avoid stressful topics or you will want to avoid getting into bed together. Focus on enjoying each other and connection. After a busy day, this will put you back on the same team.

4. Don’t Jet Lag Yourself on Weekends. If you’re a night owl or didn’t quite get enough sleep during the week, it can be tempting to catch up on weekends. The problem is that it messes up your circadian rhythm which makes it harder to fall asleep at the right time and makes you less alert during the day. Same goes for naps that are too long or too late, so keep them to less than half an hour and in the middle of the day.

5. Melatonin Won’t Rescue You from Bad Habits. Melatonin and other supplements promise better sleep, but they’re less powerful than bad sleep habits. If your sleep schedule is all over the place, your body won’t know when to feel awake or tired. If you’re slugging down caffeine to survive the day, there will be too much in your system at bedtime, so you won’t sleep well. If you’re doing fun or activating stuff at night (other than sex) then of course you don’t feel tired. Rather than looking to a pill bottle for salvation from your sleep sins, focus on good habits.

Good sleep requires consistency and solid follow through, both of which are harder with ADHD, so cut yourself some slack. If you fall off the horse, get back on. The goal is to rack up more nights that are closer to your right amount of sleep. This sets you up to tackle the day with bold purpose in your heart and a confident smile on your face. 

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If getting things done in a consistent and predictable way has always been a struggle for you, ADHD may be the culprit.

Unaddressed, it leads to too many embarrassing experiences of dropping the ball or just barely getting over the finish line on time. No matter how much you beat yourself up, your behavior doesn’t change enough next time. It’s demoralizing.

Manage Your ADHD So It Doesn’t Manage You

If you know or suspect you have ADHD, you will need to be more intentional about getting things done and staying centered. The reward is passionately pursuing your goals because you’re confident in your ability to achieve them.

1. Figure Out What Matters Most.

Being busy is not the same as being productive. It only counts if you’re doing what matters most. Life and work always have more tasks than time. If you’re not clear about priorities, and therefore what is less of a priority, then you will be ruled by whatever just happened or is noisiest. You will be a passenger in your own life. Instead, invest the cognitive effort to really think about what most deserves your energy. Then invest some emotional effort to tolerate the discomfort of letting some things go.

2. Kill the Competition.

ADHD makes it harder to filter out distractions and temptations. They hit your attention hard. So, rather than trying to not be distracted by distractions, it’s much more effective to block, minimize, or reduce them beforehand. Don’t roll those dice. Stay connected to your focus.

3. Yes, You Need a Real Schedule and To Do List.

Just remembering may work sometimes, but it also leads to a lot of last-minute scrambling and hits to your reputation. Yes, sometimes you will need to make yourself pause and put a task into your schedule or to do list. ADHD can feel like unstoppable momentum. Looking at a long list may just remind you of everything you still haven’t done. Remember that these are living documents. You will add events and tasks and also you will decide to delete some off. Writing something down doesn’t make it a blood oath.

4. Get Serious About Sleep

Stealing time from sleep can feel like a get out of jail free card. You may even tell yourself that you don’t need much sleep. You do. Sleep deprivation will suck away your productivity tomorrow and also make you less fun to hang out with. Your bedtime is a real deadline, not a suggestion. It will help you start your day felling alive and focused.

5. Admit It When You Blow It

If your batting average is sometimes lower than you wish it would be, then it’s extra important to be good at apologizing and making some amends. Since ADHD makes it harder to reliably convert intentions into actions, it’s also important to tell people in a genuine and believable way that you took the task seriously, that their happiness is important to you, and that you’re working hard even if it doesn’t always show. This is the brave part and a crucial component to your being effective.

6. Maybe It’s Time to Consider Medication

If you continue to feel like you’re working harder than you want to be and don’t have enough to show for it, then it might be time to consider medication. Most people with ADHD find that it works quite well and with manageable side effects. If you had diabetes, you wouldn’t chastise yourself that you just need to work harder. You still need to make wise choices, but medication makes it easier to follow that good plan.

This is bigger Than ADHD. The point of managing your ADHD bravely and more effectively is to create a life you can be excited about, where you feel valued as a contributor, and remain eager for the next opportunity.

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