Having had Dolly Parton in our lifetime feels like an extraordinary gift whose value is priceless. In an era often characterized by division and judgement, her death offers a rare moment where people from every background can unite around the values of acceptance, integrity, and love.

Dolly modeled qualities so many of us aspire to embody. She was unapologetic about her outward appearance from the start, fully embracing and acknowledging her love of rhinestones, makeup, big hair, and her iconic curves. Watch any interview with her from any decade and you will see a humble, intelligent, determined, talented, and deeply generous woman who never hesitated to share how she viewed the world. We felt genuinely safe with Dolly because she never disguised who she was. She was the Mom, Aunt, big sister, and Meemaw we all wanted.

A woman of deep devotion, Dolly described herself as spiritual rather than religious. Her faith was defined by radical acceptance, humility, and non-judgement. “I try not to judge because God hasn’t called me to do that; He called me to love.”

As an accomplished and exceptional songwriter, Dolly thought of her songs as her children and fiercely protected them. In 1974 she famously stood her ground and refused to let Elvis record “I Will Always Love You” when Colonel Parker demanded she sign over 50% of the publishing rights.

Her fierce protection of what mattered extended directly into her philanthropy. Recognizing the life-changing power of education, she founded the Imagination Library in 1995, putting more than 200 million books directly into the hands of young children worldwide. In 2022, she expanded that care to her Dollywood team, covering 100% of tuition, fees, and books for all employees including seasonal to part time, starting on their first day of work.

No matter how famous she was or how many millions she earned, Dolly remained steadfastly loyal to her roots. She helped raise her 11 siblings and spent her life supporting generations of nieces, nephews, and extended family with their health, education, and careers.

When Dollywood opened in 1986, it was designed to invest in East Tennessee’s economy. And when catastrophic wildfires swept through the county in 2016, Dolly raised over $12 million dollars to aid with relief efforts and gave $1,000 per month for six months to 900 families who lost their homes.

Our grief over losing Dolly highlights a deep collective yearning for everything she embodied. Her unconditional acceptance, unwavering dedication to her craft, the fundamental dignity and respect every human deserves, and unshakeable loyalty to family and community.

She has left us with a phenomenal catalog of songs and storytelling, but more importantly she left us a deeply ingrained blueprint for resilience and grace. Bringing a little more Dolly into our lives begins with loving others without judgement, standing up for our worth, and choosing to meet a divided world with an open and generous heart. And some rhinestones and sparkles never hurt either.

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There are five ways to find this type of solace that are simple and do not take a lot of effort or time. Each one will boost your sense of purpose and over time provide comfort, hope, and connection.

1. Go outside every day. Do you have a special place you’ve traveled to where you can close your eyes and be there instantly? Chances are it was somewhere in nature. For me if I go to a body of water, especially the ocean, I immediately feel grounded and at peace. There is profound healing when we are among living organisms much older than we are, that simply exist and have survived enormous shifts over time.Being in nature every day can also help you create a daily ritual, which is an important way to connect (or reconnect) to your authentic self. This easy practice can help to lower any physiological stress and encourage quiet reflection. Cutting out all external stimulation (social media, music, podcasts, etc) and letting our senses absorb the environment lets our thoughts flow easily without the filter of someone else’s thoughts. This ritual brings clarity about your grief and what is actually important to you becomes evident.

2. Plan a pot luck dinner party. If you are experiencing a death loss, plan a get together with friends and family members who knew your person, and have everyone bring a favorite food or dish they enjoyed with that person. Share the story of how you met, the funniest memory, or a time they surprised you. Participating in a meal collectively while remembering someone who is gone is a meaningful way to normalize the pain of losing the people we love. You might learn something new about your person while also feeling more connected in your grief.

3. Engage in a new hobby. Most of us have an activity or a hobby that we used to love and spend time engaging in. Or maybe there is something you heard about or saw on a local social media reel that looks appealing? Now is the time to take the next step and go! It doesn’t have to become your next passion, the point is to do something that brings you enjoyment, provides a distraction, and gets you out with other people.

4. Find a cause to volunteer your time. The benefits of community service work are numerous. You are able to make a real contribution towards a charitable foundation and directly impact peoples’ lives just by showing up and giving your time. You are able to have a broader perspective of not only grief and loss but of the resilience of the human spirit. It is a powerful act that will remind you what it means to be courageous.

5. Create a neighborhood anchor. Find a neutral space in your community where you can become a regular. Maybe it’s a coffee shop, a park, a library, or a community garden. When you regularly show up at such a place, it provides a low stakes level of social engagement where over time you will become a familiar face and a part of the landscape. Eventually you will be recognized by other regulars and have somewhere other than work and home where you belong.

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