Contemplating Christmas traditions can make everyone empathize with Tim Allen’s character in Christmas with the Kranks! The holidays often bring out the worst in families, as everyone wants—or demands—to spend it with their extended family. Of course, spending the holidays with one side and not the other can hurt feelings and cause resentment. Unfortunately, there often isn’t an easy way to make the division of time equal, so grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles can all share the celebration with your family.
Young families need to ensure they create new family traditions that are unique to them. Coming up with a way to celebrate the holidays as a singular family unit is important for you and your children to experience. At some point, the time will come when you and your family will be the elders, and having special traditions to pass down to the children becomes vital.
Understanding the Origins of Christmas Traditions
The celebration of Christmas originated centuries ago. As the Roman Catholic Church celebrated the birth of Christ in December, the Pagans engaged in the festival of Yule. Over the years, the two holidays have blended into one, and many of the common symbols of Christmas are actually Pagan remnants. Theory suggests that the Romans chose December 25th as Christ’s birthday in order to compete with Pagan celebrations and discourage Christians from joining in. Christmas trees, holly, wreaths, and mistletoe are all descendants of Yule. The Pagans would use the greenery in their homes to welcome the end of winter, ward off evil spirits, and improve their chances of luck during the New Year’s harvest. The same is true for the lights. Pagans kept lights on in their homes to welcome Angels of wealth and believed that lit-up homes would attract them more easily. Even the baking of Christmas cookies comes from Roman times when common folk would routinely bake cookies for the Roman Senate.
Other Pagan traditions that have influenced modern Christmas practices include the carols of music so often sung and heard on the radio. Yule, also called the Winter Solstice, was a loud celebration where people dressed up, exchanged gifts, and sang festive songs for twelve days. No work took place during this time, and lavish meals were prepared from the foods that had been harvested. Neighbors would share their goods and foods, remaining optimistic that more would come easily in the New Year.
While the ancient traditions are still with us, it doesn’t mean that you and your family can’t start some of your own. Some people use the time to travel to warm beach resorts, escaping the season altogether. Others spend hours in the kitchen baking treats and cookies to give to others. Even if you find that you don’t spend the bulk of Christmas Day at home, try to do things before and afterward that will leave a lasting impression on your children. Visiting a soup kitchen with your family and serving others is a nice break from routine. Adopting children every year to play Secret Santa, driving around on Christmas Eve to look at lights and listen to carols, or even seeing a holiday movie together on Christmas Day are simple ideas for creating traditions of your own.
Remember during the holidays that just because you are now a blended family doesn’t mean you have to follow the rules of Christmases past. While your entire family on both sides may want you around, sometimes it won’t be possible to do that and still enjoy the holiday with your own family, as you deserve. Talk with your family and try to come up with ways that will mutually benefit everyone. Keep in mind that your children are only little once. Soon, they’ll want to spend Christmas with their friends, and Christmas traditions may lose their meaning for a while.
An easy way to avoid feeling rushed and hurried during the holidays is to agree to rotate whom you visit each year. You can visit the in-laws this year and your parents the next. Alternatively, you can trade off spending Thanksgiving and Christmas with one family or the other. There is also nothing wrong with creating your own Christmas celebration. Instead of feeling pressured to spend Christmas Eve or Christmas Day with family, decide that your extended family celebration will take place on the Sunday before Christmas every year. This way, you’ll still have a full-fledged celebration with family and can enjoy private family time as well.
In some ways, it’s a shame that the Romans didn’t extend the celebration of Christmas for twelve days like the Pagans did. Had they done that, there would have been plenty of time to spread yourself around without feeling worn out. The kids would have plenty of time to play with their toys and enjoy the season, and parents wouldn’t feel like they had to cram a week’s worth of visiting into one or two days. Maybe this year, your family could initiate a Winter Solstice celebration of their own. The point is that the holidays are about family and togetherness, and that shouldn’t be threatened by feelings of remorse, resentment, or being overwhelmed. Christmas traditions can be anything you want them to be and should reflect the love and passion of your family. Hopefully, your children will want to carry them through the rest of their lives. If the Romans and Pagans were able to collaborate and blend their traditions, modern families should be able to do the same.
