There may come a point in your child’s life when you consider hiring a tutor. Whether due to falling grades, difficulty helping them as they get older, or finding that you and they don’t make the best study partners, it’s important to approach the experience with flexibility and a positive attitude. This way, your child can benefit the most from the experience.
First, understand that children go through all sorts of phases and stages. A perfect elementary school student may begin to struggle as they enter middle school, simply because the teaching style changes drastically. Teachers begin to give children more responsibility and accountability, starting as early as fourth grade. As a result, children must start remembering homework assignments, planning ahead, and relying less on reminders, notes home to parents, and constant classroom time to work on assignments. Another factor is that children who struggle with a concept need to have the confidence to ask for help and recognize that teachers are there to assist them.
If you notice a sudden dip in performance, especially in a subject like math, the first step is to talk with your child’s teacher. Ask if there is after-school help or supplemental instruction available. This is crucial because, while curriculum requirements are set by the state, each school district moves at its own pace. Seeking help from your school ensures that your child will receive tailored support based on their unique learning experience.
How to Find the Right Tutor
Most school districts have policies that prevent you from hiring a current teacher as a tutor due to conflicts of interest. However, if no one-on-one help is available, your child’s teacher can still be a valuable resource in finding a tutor. Since they have firsthand knowledge of your child’s abilities and learning style, a teacher may know someone who would be a good match.
It’s important to understand that hiring a tutor comes with costs, typically around $20-$35 per hour. While this might seem expensive, the advantage is that it’s one-on-one time with your child, and teachers are often more efficient in their instruction. When hiring a tutor, ensure they have academic training, whether as a current or retired teacher, and always interview them beforehand. It’s essential to understand the homework and assignments they will require and to see a clear plan of action outlining what your child will work on. Tutors should also provide regular updates on progress, similar to a report card, showing milestones achieved and areas of struggle.
Many parents feel let down by the school system when their child begins to struggle. While it’s easy to blame others, the truth is that children are changing physiologically, emotionally, and psychologically at a rapid pace. Challenges are a normal part of growing up. It’s essential to view these hurdles not as failures but as opportunities to help your child. Teachers have limitations, particularly in higher grades, and education is a three-way partnership between students, parents, and teachers. Your child is ultimately responsible for their own performance at school, while you are responsible for upholding rules at home. Both you and your child are accountable for their success.
Shouting, berating, or disciplining may not be the best response. If you’ve been considering hiring a tutor for a while, or if you sense something is off, trust your instincts. Your parental intuition is likely right.
Addressing Social or Emotional Issues
It’s also important to consider the possibility that your child is struggling socially at school or dealing with challenges you may not be aware of. While hiring a tutor won’t resolve all of these issues, it can boost your child’s confidence and provide the extra support they need to overcome obstacles. Talking with teachers and administrators to get to the bottom of any potential issues is key. While you may think you know your child best, you’re not present at school every day and may not be aware of what’s happening there. Be open to the idea that factors at home could also affect your child’s academic performance. Teachers often note that parents are sometimes unaware of the real behavior and academic challenges their child faces.
If you are considering hiring a tutor, it’s essential to make the experience as positive as possible for both you and your child. Tutoring shouldn’t feel like a punishment. Adjusting routines at home, socially, and giving your child more time to study can be instrumental in a quick recovery. You may realize that your child needs consistent tutoring, but take heart—every child is unique and learns differently. Structured school settings often fail to recognize the giftedness of students who test poorly or can’t be measured on a standard scale. If this is the case, embrace your child’s uniqueness and find ways to nurture and guide them in their strengths. Be willing to let go of preconceived expectations and allow your child to flourish by following their own dreams.
