Wedding Gift Dilemma: How Much Should You Really Spend?
Whether it’s your best friend, a family member, or a co-worker, buying a wedding gift can cause much anxiety. You don’t want to appear cheap, but you also don’t want to throw away money on something that will likely gather dust. Many couples already have everything they need to “play house,” so why buy more? This raises the question: is money the best and most versatile gift? The challenge with cash is making it feel thoughtful, especially if you’re on a budget. A $20 bill might seem too small, and it can feel impersonal, but how much should you really spend on a wedding present?
How to Choose the Right Amount to Spend on a Wedding Gift
A recent poll of engaged couples found that most (86%) prefer cash, as they can use it for their honeymoon or to pay off bills. Cash is often the best gift, especially for couples who have already set up their homes. However, registries are a common tradition, even if they’re not always practical. If you choose to give cash, consider your relationship with the couple. Are you attending the wedding shower, the wedding, and maybe offering an engagement gift? If so, you should spend more thoughtfully. If only the wedding is involved, the amount to spend becomes easier to determine.
A good rule of thumb is to spend $20 for each year you’ve known the couple. If you’ve known someone for 4 years, $80 is a reasonable amount. If you’re close family, feel free to spend a bit more. However, unless you’re the parent of the bride or groom, spending more than $150 should not be expected from anyone. Whether you give cash or something off the registry depends on your relationship with the couple. If you know they won’t use the fine china, consider something more personal, like a couple’s massage gift certificate or tickets to an event.
Consider your budget as well. If you’re financially strapped, a heartfelt, personal gift like a photo story or a poem can be just as meaningful as something bought at a store. Many couples will appreciate the thoughtfulness of a personal gift over something generic. What truly matters is that you attend the wedding and support the couple—whether you think their marriage is the right choice or not.
It’s easy to get caught up in worrying about how much to spend, but the most important thing is showing up. Weddings are stressful, and your presence is a gift in itself. So, relax, and know that your support is what counts most.
