The designer furniture and perfectly matched décor of the past are likely now buried under the joyful chaos that screams, “Child in the house!” If you can still see the couch—or at least half of it remains unstained—you’re among the lucky ones. That said, you have a long way to go, and that pristine couch probably won’t last.
Of all the things that can be said about a messy house littered with toys in every room—causing people to high-step and leap from one space to another—I’m far more suspicious of a spotless home with children. Perhaps this stems from growing up with a meticulous mother who didn’t allow toys to linger, whether we were playing with them or not. In our rooms, everything had a place; buckets and shelves were for storage, and playing with toys on the floor was rarely permitted. Looking back, it was a bit confusing. When I moved out, I rebelled by living in a pigsty, rarely tidying up. Now, with children of my own, I embrace the messy distractions. We clean up once a day at the end of the day, and yes, everyone helps!
Strategies for Encouraging Kids to Tidy Up
So, how do we get kids to clean up their toys? First, remember that every toy we buy will end up scattered around the house. If there’s no room for a blow-up jumper with 500 balls, don’t buy it on a whim. Most households today have far too many toys for one or two kids to play with. If toys are spilling out of your child’s room or playroom, cleaning up can feel daunting for both you and them. Be realistic! When setting up a child’s room, prioritize storage solutions that make tidying easy. Buckets, bins, shelves, drawers, and baskets work wonders. Kids can easily learn to put things in and out, and labeling these containers adds even more organization. For very young children, playing the Barney clean-up song or a similar tune can turn tidying into a fun, dance-filled activity.
Another way to encourage kids to clean is by introducing friendly competition. See who can tidy up the fastest or do the best job—kids of all ages love a challenge. If the toy clutter is affecting your sanity, designate one room as a toy-free zone. I chose my bedroom. No books, talking dolls, lizards, blocks, Legos, or toy horses are allowed there. This gives me an escape when the colorful array of plastic objects becomes overwhelming, and it keeps me from nagging the kids too much.
When the toy pile becomes excessive, we hold a house-cleaning day. Each child gets a large trash bag to fill for a yard sale or donation. The prospect of earning $2 from a bald Barbie can motivate any child to declutter. This reduces the junk we accumulate and makes daily cleaning easier. If we’re overwhelmed by the “stuff” lying around, our kids likely are too, and purging can be exhilarating. Parents should also recognize that as kids grow, they outgrow certain toys. There’s no shame in packing them up or letting them go.
For older kids, offering an allowance is a great incentive to clean their rooms. Maintaining a set schedule of chores teaches responsibility. If they don’t do their tasks, they don’t get paid. At this stage, you might need to adopt a “closed door” policy. Children, especially as they get older, need a sense of ownership over their space and the freedom to decide what works for them. If moldy pizza or soda cans are stashed under the bed, that’s a bigger issue than just messiness. Parents should set clear expectations and trust kids to follow them. Getting a kid to clean their room at this age is like getting them to do homework—if it’s a house rule, there must be consequences for not following through.
One of the worst ways to encourage tidying is to clean their room for them. If kids know the mess bothers you, they’ll wait until you can’t stand it anymore and do it yourself while they’re at school. Pause and consider whether cleaning their room is more about your needs than theirs. While we don’t want rooms to become hazardous, there’s truth to the saying, “You reap what you sow.” When they can’t find clean underwear or socks, they’ll have no choice but to tidy up.
Getting kids to clean their rooms is easier if you instill order early on. If, from the time they can walk, they know clean-up time is before dinner, it becomes a ritual they embrace. Cleaning doesn’t have to be a major parenting battle, causing strife and stress. One day, the harmless toys scattered around will be replaced by empty spaces, which can make any parent nostalgic. That’s when the trash bags of old toys in the attic can be pulled down for a trip down memory lane, revisiting the joyful chaos of raising kids. In the meantime, if your biggest worry is how to get your child to clean their room, you’re one of the lucky ones—count your blessings!
