Most teens will try at least one type of recreational drug before they graduate high school. It’s a scary thought, but statistics show that very few kids make it through adolescence without at least experimenting out of curiosity. Unfortunately, the social attitudes surrounding this experimentation are rather relaxed, and the drugs many kids try can be dangerous. Does that mean your child is a regular drug user? Not at all. Most kids who experiment with drugs don’t continue using them after a short period. Many teens state that they simply, “don’t like the way being high feels.” A great number of teens experience near misses with their health and safety during their first time and quickly learn that this isn’t the path they want to follow. But what about the kids who find being high fun and exciting, and suddenly begin changing right before your very eyes?
Recognizing the Signs of Regular Drug Use
Teens who begin using drugs regularly alter their behavior—and they do so quickly. One day they seem like the same kid you’ve always known, and the next, it feels like they’ve been replaced by a scary imposter. They become secretive, telling the most obvious lies. Their appearance changes: they may start dressing differently, stop caring about things they once loved, and display wild mood swings. Their physical appearance may also change as their eyes glaze over and their skin takes on a different, often gray, shade.
Many of these symptoms can also indicate other issues, such as depression, new friends, changes at home, or deep personal conflicts. It can be very difficult and frustrating to tell what’s really going on.
So what is a parent to do? First, talk to your kids often about your stance on drugs. Remind them that it only takes one time for a fatal reaction to occur. Explain the harsh realities, even if you think they’re too young to hear it. Once is simply not enough. You have to tell them again and again. Kids may seem like they aren’t paying attention, but most admit that their parents still hold a significant amount of influence when they’re making decisions. They just don’t want you to know that.
A good friend of mine started a special parenting group the year her son turned 13. She created the group to hold parents accountable for checking in with their kids and exhibiting responsible parenting. The group’s purpose was to help single parents maintain accountability for their actions and decisions. Soon, married parents joined as well, because it helped maintain communication between partners. In this group, parents would ask each other questions to gauge what was happening at home. For example, they’d ask, “Is your teenager doing drugs?” or “Is your teenager having sex?” By honestly answering these questions, parents could help each other decipher concerning behaviors and come up with the most honest answer possible. Groups like this can be very helpful for parents of children of all ages.
Of course, you don’t need to be part of a group to pay attention to your child’s behavior. Any type of radical change signals that something is amiss, and you may want to find a trusted drug rehab center. As a parent, it’s your job to sit down with your child and talk it over. If they are using drugs, they’re unlikely to admit it to you right away. But that doesn’t mean the effort won’t pay off. Most kids will “cool it” if they feel their parents are starting to figure it out. They may not stop altogether, but they’ll likely slow down their usage. This is a start. Over time, they may feel the pressure has lifted and begin using their drugs more often. Again, you’ll notice the same behavioral changes that concerned you initially. You may even see a pattern developing over a short period.
In most cases, a teenager who is using drugs will eventually slip up. By then, they’ve likely moved beyond mere experimentation. Sooner or later, they’ll become careless because they’re too busy chasing the high. You might find drug paraphernalia in their room or catch them during a strong buzz. We all want to believe our children are doing well. Don’t be too quick to believe that you’re not seeing the truth. They’re not holding it for a friend, and they weren’t planning to throw it away when they had the chance. If you find evidence right in front of your eyes that supports your suspicions, for the sake of your child, don’t turn a blind eye just because it’s easier to believe their poorly crafted story.
If you’re convinced that your child is using drugs, there are home drug tests available at most pharmacies. These tests can be expensive for a one-time use, but having concrete evidence might be the only way to confront a teenager who’s particularly slick and hasn’t made any obvious mistakes. When it comes to your child’s health and safety, knowing the truth can be a lifesaver—literally.
