I am guilty of it too. I know that I’m facing a night alone, and I don’t like it. My better half works as a third-shift computer specialist, which means I go to bed alone five out of seven nights. It seems harmless, doesn’t it, to pick up the pup and let him cuddle next to me? Yeah, right. Letting your dog sleep on your bed opens up a whole host of issues.
The Problems with Letting Your Dog Sleep on Your Bed
When your dog sleeps on your bed, he brings with him all the little treasures he’s picked up throughout the day. Since he doesn’t shower daily like you do, you’re relying solely on the power of his tongue to clean away the dirt and general “ook” he’s collected outside. I like sleeping with my dog, but I don’t like sleeping with his “ook.” No matter how many times I convince myself he’s clean enough, he brings it in with him. The evidence is in the way the blankets smell the next morning—kind of ookie.
What’s worse is when your sloppy pal brings home a few friends. Right before bed, while you took him out for his evening pee, he was out there collecting souvenirs. Of course, you’ll notice them the next morning when you wake up with flea bites on your rear. This can be unsettling. No matter how much I love my dog, I do not love sleeping with bugs. We spend a lot of money on shelter to guarantee we won’t have to sleep with bugs. If humans enjoyed sharing their beds with bugs, we’d all still be sleeping in caves. Fleas don’t care whether they’re consuming human blood or dog blood; they just need blood to survive.
Aside from the issues of dirt and bugs, we are setting ourselves up for a lifetime struggle with our canine companion. After all, he’s no dummy. He knows there’s supposed to be a hierarchy, one that keeps him on the floor with his own bed. The instant we bring our dogs into bed with us, we grant them a new place in the pack. This is especially true if there are other dogs in the household who don’t sleep with us. By allowing them equality at nighttime, we are being completely unfair by expecting them to recognize their appropriate place during the day.
We want them to stay off the furniture, listen to us, and respect our leadership. Yet, we completely undermine our authority when we allow them to share our bed. For some dogs, this isn’t a complete disaster.
Some dogs have the personality to distinguish between beds and know exactly which ones they’re allowed on and when. However, this is quite rare. Most dogs will start to take a more definitive stance within their pack when they are granted such an equal role with their leader. You’re sending them the signal that they’re sharing in your leadership, and this message is likely to carry over into other aspects of their pack life.
When you elevate your puppy into a leadership position, he has a harder time dealing with your absence, visitors, and even other members of his pack approaching you. By giving up your leadership to a dog, you make him responsible for your safety. How nerve-wracking it must be to be suddenly thrust into a leadership position without having earned it, only to lack the ability to monitor his pack 24/7. After all, you leave the house almost every day. How is he supposed to protect you as your leader when you’re not there? This can lead to separation anxiety.
Letting your dog sleep on your bed creates a whole host of new problems. Dogs in a leadership position without struggle are likely to experience significant anxiety when you leave them behind. This can lead to behavioral problems, like chewing, marking, and barking. Other dogs may simply hold vigil until you return. How fair is that? He should be at home doing what dogs do, not stressing over your whereabouts and waiting for you like a father on the night of his daughter’s first date.
All these issues can be avoided by setting firm ground rules and keeping the dog off the bed. We, as humans, tend to forget that our dogs are less human than we like to think. We offer the assumption that they can reason, that they understand it’s just for a few nights a week, and that they can be retrained. The truth remains that when we let our dogs sleep on our beds, we stir their place in the pack to an unsettling degree. We do this because we are selfish and want to snuggle with our cute and loyal friends. As their humans, it’s our job to make decisions that are better for them, not just to ask them to fill our current need, only to give them inconsistent signals the following day. After all, we are supposed to be their leaders, and the worst mistake a leader can make is to offer the pack inconsistency.
