Raising teenagers is difficult. By nature, they often go through periods of oppositional behavior that can be incredibly frustrating to deal with. Children and teens occasionally need to challenge authority in order to develop a strong sense of self. However, children with oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) are so intensely defiant that it interferes with everyday life. They struggle to concentrate in school, maintain friendships, stay out of chronic trouble, and keep peace in the household.
In today’s society, psychiatrists and psychologists are often too quick to diagnose children and teenagers with disorders. Just because a child is chronically challenging authority and finding themselves in trouble doesn’t necessarily mean they have a psychological disorder. Before deciding on treatment for a disorder, it’s important to examine all viewpoints thoroughly.
Understanding the Root Causes of Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Children who grow up in highly argumentative homes or homes without boundaries are likely to display oppositional behavior when they are suddenly restricted and have not yet learned self-discipline. Traumatic events can also lead to suppressed anger, which manifests as opposition.
However, there are cases where no obvious explanation exists, and the child truly has a misfiring in the brain that leads to oppositional defiant disorder. If your teenager is diagnosed with ODD, be aware that without proper treatment, they are at risk for a more serious form of the disorder known as conduct disorder.
Conduct disorder is responsible for many behaviors that result in serious consequences, including violent crimes. While it’s certainly not guaranteed that a child with oppositional defiant disorder will develop conduct disorder, the possibility is significant enough that treatment should be a priority.
Typically, children with oppositional disorders are diagnosed between preschool ages and early adolescence. Often, this disorder coexists with other conditions such as ADHD, mood disorders, anxiety disorders, learning disabilities, or depression. In these cases, both disorders must be treated to give the child a chance at a happy and productive life.
Symptoms of ODD can include behaviors typical of childhood, like temper tantrums, vengeful behaviors, arguing, resentment toward adults, deliberately upsetting others, and extreme anger issues. Any of these behaviors can describe a teenager having a particularly bad week, but a teenager who experiences these symptoms on a long-term basis should undergo a psychiatric consultation and evaluation. If possible, your child should undergo at least two independent evaluations to ensure a more accurate diagnosis, as some psychiatrists may have a tendency to over-diagnose disorders. Evaluate your child’s evaluator just as thoroughly as they evaluate your child.
There are numerous treatment programs shown to be effective in managing oppositional defiant disorder. Specialized parenting programs can help your teenager learn effective coping skills, and therapy can teach your adolescent better ways of dealing with anger and frustration.
It is important to react positively to any changes in behavior and to take the time to notice improvements. Consistency is crucial—both in setting limitations on behavior and enforcing consequences for violations. Make sure these limitations and consequences are clearly spelled out so there are no misunderstandings when it’s time to enforce them.
Taking care of an adolescent with ODD is taxing, stressful, and exhausting. Taking care of yourself is just as important. Maintaining outside interests and friendships is vital, as it makes managing ODD and any accompanying disorders more manageable. Even if you’re a single parent, it’s important to prioritize your own health so that you can take care of your child. You are allowed time away and fun without feeling guilty.
Seek support from others who understand the daily challenges of dealing with ODD or any life-altering disorder. There are support groups, friends, and online resources that can connect you with people in similar situations. Asking for help when you need it is not a sign of weakness. There will be good periods and bad periods, and you will need to be prepared for them as they come. Having access to multiple resources prevents you from feeling overwhelmed.
Above all, remember that most teens who undergo treatment improve enough to lead happy, productive lives. With continued treatment, you, as a parent, can help your child through this remarkably difficult period, and you both can come out on top.
