Potty Training: A Guide for Parents
Potty training is often seen as one of the most challenging and stressful times for parents. However, it doesn’t have to be. The key is to approach it with a flexible attitude. This way, you won’t find yourself worrying that your child is somehow abnormal (because he’s not!). He will eventually be potty trained and will certainly not be the only kid in kindergarten still wearing diapers. Just because you’ve decided or read a book that now is the right time doesn’t mean your son agrees. If you notice excessive resistance or setbacks, you may be pushing him too hard.
Developmental Readiness for Potty Training
The first question most parents ask is whether their child should sit or stand to use the potty. Potty training boys is different from girls, as they come with different expectations and rules. Of course, the men in your son’s life stand up to use the potty (although they may not admit it). However, both the American Academy of Pediatrics and many parenting experts recommend teaching boys to sit down at first. Why? Because they will eventually need to sit to pee and have bowel movements, and this consistency helps. Additionally, many toddlers lack the coordination to aim properly, so sitting down can make things more sanitary for your bathroom.
Before beginning potty training, ensure your son is reaching certain developmental milestones. First, he needs to recognize when he has the urge to go. Around 12 months, most toddlers start to notice the sensation but still go in their diapers. This is a good time to introduce words like “pee” and “potty” to help your child start associating these terms with the act of going. Between the ages of 1 and 2, depending on the child, they may start verbalizing that they’ve used the bathroom. Be sure to use the word “potty” often during this stage to create an association with eliminating.
Next, look for signs of interest. Boys generally show an interest in potty training after age 2. Since they tend to develop physically slower than girls, potty training may take a little longer. Around age 2, let your son accompany you and other family members to the bathroom. As he observes the older people around him, he may become interested in doing it himself. The desire to use the potty like a “big boy” is a great motivator!
The Potty Chair: A Helpful Tool
Potty chairs are a great option because they are portable and can be placed in the living room, bedroom, or anywhere your child might be. Potty training needs to be convenient for both you and your child, as they may need to go right now. You can either buy a potty chair for your son to sit on or a urinal to help him learn to stand while peeing. Let him help choose what he likes to make the process more engaging. If you’re teaching him to sit down, opt for a potty chair that looks like a real toilet to avoid confusion. To make clean-up easier, place a plastic liner underneath. If it works for you, let your child run around naked while potty training to help him associate the sensation of wetness with the need to go.
One tip: While pull-ups are convenient, they can make it harder for toddlers to recognize the feeling of wetness, which is crucial for potty training. Cotton underwear is a better option because it helps your son feel the wetness immediately, aiding the learning process.
Now, you’re ready to begin potty training!
The next step is to take him to the bathroom at least once or twice an hour. You might also want to establish a reward system, offering small treats like an M&M when he successfully uses the potty. Consistency is key, so try to schedule potty training during a week when you’re home to ensure your child gets plenty of practice. When he eats or drinks, ask him if he needs to go. By asking frequently and taking him to the potty regularly, you’ll help reduce the number of accidents. When an accident happens (and it will), stay calm. Potty training is all about consistency and patience. Don’t shame your child, and avoid using punishment.
At night, it’s still best for your son to wear a diaper or pull-up, as most boys don’t wake up to go potty until they’re around 28 months old. However, during the day, it’s time to put away the diapers. Emphasize how exciting it is to be a “big boy.” If your son seems interested in potty training, stick with it. If he starts to regress or shows signs of distress, consider taking a break for a week or two. You’ll be surprised how much of a difference some time off can make.
As your son becomes more confident with potty training, start teaching him to urinate standing up. Many parents use fun items like fruit loops or Cheerios in the toilet to encourage him to aim and make the process enjoyable. You’ll likely need a step stool so he can reach the potty properly. Whether or not to teach him to lift the seat is a personal preference at this point.
Finally, one thing you’ll notice while potty training a boy is that he will quickly realize that he can go anywhere, just like dad! Don’t be surprised if you catch him watering the flowers in the yard or taking a quick break at the playground when nature calls. And as tempting as it may be, don’t let dad see you teach him how to wipe (or blot)! Though it may seem unbelievable, this is an essential part of the male code.
