Potty Training a Girl – Leaving the Diapers Behind

Girl on the potty

Potty Training Girls: A Stress-Free Approach

From my perspective, potty training girls seems far easier than training boys. As a mother of four girls, I’ve successfully potty trained three, and the process felt almost effortless. It happened naturally when each girl was ready. My first two, twins, were fully potty trained by age two. Their competitive spirit drove them to vie for the coveted Elmo potty (despite having two), eager to earn praise from their father and me. If outdoing their sister meant using the potty, they were all in. My third daughter, repulsed by diapers, essentially trained herself, transitioning to big-girl panties by 14 months. My youngest is still mastering the potty but shows signs she’ll soon trade diapers for her own Elmo panties.

In my experience, there are no real tricks to potty training. Like all milestones, children reach this one on their own timetable, not a moment sooner. When they find wet, smelly diapers uncomfortable, they’ll train. Conversely, if a child doesn’t mind a soggy diaper, progress will be slower, much to their parents’ frustration. But rest assured, every child eventually uses the bathroom. As a parent, the key is to stop worrying, cease pushing, ignore the pediatrician’s timeline, and remember that diapers come in size 6. Let your child signal when they’re ready.

Realities and Tips for Potty Training

That said, many parents feel pressure, especially when aiming for preschool programs requiring potty training for 2- or 3-year-olds. Having worked briefly in both 2- and 3-year-old classrooms, I can confirm that few toddlers are truly trained. Parents sent them in big-kid underwear, but the assistant teacher and I often flipped coins, clothespins on our noses, to decide who would handle the inevitable accidents. Initially, we sent soiled underwear home in plastic bags, but soon realized tossing them was better (with parental approval). By mid-year, we recommended pull-ups. No matter how often we took kids to the bathroom, accidents happened—and that was okay. Potty training is just part of growing up, and imposing age limits ignores each child’s unique pace.

From my time in the classroom, I learned that boys require different approaches—some sit to pee, and wiping differs—adding complexity I never faced. The confusion around urinals only reinforces my belief that it’s easier to potty train girls than boys. I feel fortunate to have only daughters.

For potty training girls, an open-door bathroom policy at home works wonders. Curious toddlers love to visit and inspect the potty’s contents, so let them. The sound of pee intrigues them, sparking their desire to try. Encourage dads to pee sitting down to avoid confusion. Skip small toddler potties in favor of a toilet seat insert, which feels more grown-up and motivates use. From a young age, I talked openly with my girls about pee and poop, even emptying their diapers into the toilet. This excited them, and they loved flushing and waving goodbye to their “creations.” When they sit on the potty, let them read a book while you sit nearby to chat and ease any fears. My youngest now calls the household to admire her potty achievements, and we celebrate as if she’s recited the Constitution—it’s working. Whenever possible, let them wear underwear, especially in summer when accidents are less messy outdoors. Modern diapers are so absorbent that kids often don’t feel wet, but underwear makes wetness noticeable, prompting quicker responses. Above all, never discipline during potty training. In fact, “potty training” should be reframed as “potty learning,” approached with the same patience as other toddler milestones.

Potty training girls is only as hard as parents make it. While you’re eager to save on diapers and wipes, remember that a trained toddler complicates outings. Nothing lasts forever—your child will outgrow diapers. Take cues from them, not books, relatives, friends, or doctors. This approach reduces stress and fosters your toddler’s confidence, letting them grow into themselves based on their unique needs and personality. No potty milestone is worth compromising that.

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