Pros and Cons of Marrying Young – What are Your Chances?

Bill and Eve have been married for 19 years. They were high school sweethearts and got married just a few short months after graduation. Today, with a family under a modest roof, they both have lingering thoughts about what life might have been like had they waited a few more years. After all, neither developed autonomy in the important areas of their life, and although they don’t admit it, they wonder what might have come their way or become possible had they followed a different path. Certainly, there are pros and cons to marrying young. The truth is that no decision in life is without its mix of positive and negative consequences. The trick is always trying to make the best of the decision once it is made and living a life without regrets, remorse, or resentment.

Some may say that Bill & Eve escaped many random dating encounters and meaningless heartbreaks by choosing to marry young. Others might argue that it’s difficult to understand what they truly wanted in life unless they were able to experience it firsthand. For Bill & Eve, they see it both ways. For them, the pros of marrying young have meant that they started their family earlier than most and will be free of traditional parental responsibilities while still relatively young. They look forward to a time in their lives when they’ll have the chance to travel together and realize all the passions they’ve set aside for now. They also feel that marrying young has allowed them to ‘grow up’ together and become closer to the people they truly are. They know each other’s past and future and have yet to grow apart. Marrying young also put them on a direct path toward adult responsibilities, leading both to secure government jobs that will allow them to retire at 25 years of service—several years ahead of most people their age.

Bill and Eve also firmly believe that marrying young helped eliminate a lot of the stress, pressure, and emotional blocks that often develop after years of searching for “the one.” Both feel secure in their relationship, knowing that each is the other’s “one and only.”

Pros and Cons of Marrying Young

When speaking about the pros and cons of marrying young, the immediate con that comes to mind is settling down without fully understanding what the world is about. For Bill & Eve, this has been a reality. They’ve stayed in their hometown, neither finished college, and moved straight from their parents’ house to a one-bedroom apartment together. Had they followed their parents’ wishes, both would have attended college out of state (at different schools), and Bill would have pursued a degree in law enforcement while Eve would have become a teacher. Yes, they both think about their unfulfilled dreams and feel somewhat stilted and resentful that they never accomplished them. Often, when people marry young, they aren’t in a place in life where they know exactly what they want or are aware of all the options that lie ahead. But, as most of us know, it doesn’t matter where you’re at in life—you always know more now than you did last year. Their longing for what could have been isn’t much different from anyone else’s.

Marrying young has also stunted their financial growth and understanding. They made a lot of mistakes as young adults, and those mistakes have followed them into their future. Although they know better now, their past errors still linger.

Another con to marrying young is that, deep down, Bill and Eve still have some innate curiosity about what another partner might be like. To date, neither has acted on that thought, but there’s a lot of time left. Even though they love each other deeply, human nature is exploratory, and one of the areas many people explore is through relationships.

From the outside, it’s easy to criticize the perceived mistakes of those who marry young. After all, how can they know what kind of person they are most compatible with if they haven’t met many others yet? But the truth is, love is blind no matter your age. The only people who can set aside love long enough to be rational are two-year-olds—and they forgive each other so fast that it always works out. Beyond that, there are pros and cons to marrying young, middle-aged, or later in life. Love has the unique power to hide many things from people. Perhaps this is for the best. If all was revealed during the act of falling in love, few of us would ever get married. If marrying young means acting on an impulsive heart, what does marrying older signify? Perhaps those who marry young are the lucky ones, following their hearts without worrying about reason, advice, or lessons, and staying true only to what they feel.

Statistics indicate that one very important pro and con of marrying young is the success rate of marriage. Younger couples tend to have a lower success rate compared to their more settled, independent, and autonomous counterparts. However, as time goes on, the overall perception of marriage seems to be getting more bleak. Let’s leave it at this: love is blind, ignorant, irrational, and often crazy. But, whether you’re young or old, the experience of love is so worth it. For those who look ahead and rarely look back, marrying young can be the best decision they ever made. For people like that, love is a never-ending adventure. For others who may one day sit looking out a window, feeling remorseful and sad about what they might have missed, marrying young is always a con! Regardless of your age, there are pros and cons to marriage that can always be evaluated, analyzed, and criticized. The trick is always deciding for yourself what good you can take from your experiences while you’re in the midst of them. If you do that during a marriage, you will usually succeed, no matter what.