Pregnancy is an exciting time. For many couples, one of the most exciting unknowns is the anticipation of their baby’s sex. In the first few weeks and months, expectant parents and families begin dreaming of their child, wondering whether they’ll be bringing home a little boy or girl. Should they paint the baby’s room pink or blue? What should they name the child? Should they buy the adorable floral infant outfit at the mall or look for sports-themed onesies in blue and green?
Thanks to technology developed since the 1980s, today’s parents don’t have to wait. Most OB-GYNs schedule a routine ultrasound around the 17th to 20th week of pregnancy to check fetal development as part of prenatal care. This ultrasound can, in around 98% of pregnancies, reveal the baby’s sex.
Should You Find Out the Baby’s Sex?
Still, many parents wonder whether they should find out the sex of their baby. Years ago, there was little technology definitive enough to predict gender, and women had to rely on methods that today are considered old wives’ tales (such as holding needles over the belly, deciphering how the baby is carried, or consulting midwives). Additionally, many expectant parents believe that keeping the sex a surprise until the end is part of the excitement of pregnancy.
Others, however, are more focused on planning and ensuring everything is ready for their baby’s arrival. They can’t wait to know the gender. Knowing the baby’s sex helps them prepare the nursery, decide what clothes to buy, create a baby registry, choose a name, and get family members ready for the new arrival. For some, it provides a sense of control over the future and peace of mind that they will be 100% prepared when the baby arrives.
According to a Gallup survey, around 60% of all expectant parents want to find out the sex of their unborn baby as soon as possible. For couples with at least one child, this number jumps by 8%. This might be due to the increased planning required and the financial impact of reusing clothes from previous children. After all, why buy new items when you can recycle clothes barely used by your last child?
For those who don’t want to find out, the reasons vary. Many enjoy keeping the excitement and mystery alive until the end. Others feel that not knowing the sex is the natural way to experience pregnancy. Some parents prefer to keep the sex a secret to avoid others pushing preconceived gender roles on them. For instance, if you don’t know the baby’s sex, no one will say, “This boy will take after his dad and be an All-American football player!”
There is also a small group of parents who feel that ultrasound and amniocentesis are unnecessary procedures in a natural pregnancy. For them, these tests are invasive or dangerous. And, of course, many people simply want the surprise on the big day, which will change their lives forever.
The good news is that there is no right or wrong answer when it comes to finding out your baby’s sex before birth. It is a strictly personal decision. While knowing the sex may offer some advantages for planning, the bottom line is that most parents just want a healthy baby, regardless of whether it’s a boy or a girl. In some cases, one parent may want to know, while the other does not. Ultrasound techs have become adept at keeping these secrets. Many couples, though, choose to find out themselves and keep the baby’s sex a secret from family members.
The Pros and Cons of Finding Out the Baby’s Sex
If you don’t find out, you’re guaranteed a huge surprise in the delivery room. You won’t have the chance to develop preconceived ideas about your child and your role in their life—nor will others. Not knowing is also preferable to finding out, only to later discover that the ultrasound tech made an error. On the other hand, knowing the sex helps you prepare for the birth, the delivery, and the immediate aftercare. It also gives you more time to choose things like names and even start decorating the baby’s room.
What about you? Did you find out your baby’s sex before delivery, or did you wait for the big reveal? Any tips for those contemplating the decision?
