Mothers’ love makes the world go round! But what about the love of a father? Many researchers are finding that the effects of a father’s love on a child’s development are often understudied and underestimated. A report from the University of Connecticut concluded that, in matters of substance abuse, depression, behavioral problems, and psychological maladjustment, the love of a father plays a more significant role than that of the mother. Furthermore, these difficulties in life can be more easily avoided if the presence of a strong and nurturing father figure is evident in a child’s life. It has long been known that parents can make a defining difference in the future of their children. While there is often debate about whether a dual-parent household produces better outcomes than a single-parent household, new studies are now focusing on fatherhood as a cornerstone of child development.
The Importance of Fatherhood in Child Development
For years, mothers have been seen as the nurturing figures genetically predisposed to provide a healthy and loving environment for their children. For decades, moms stayed home with their children while dads were away working, which led socialists to assume that motherhood played the most significant role in a child’s life. However, as societal norms began to shift, research also turned to investigate the importance of fathers in children’s lives. The results are astounding but not surprising.
A report published in the December 2001 edition of the Review of General Psychology showed that the impact of a father’s role in their child’s life has far-reaching effects. In fact, whether a father was present or not was often the sole predictor of successful outcomes for children in many areas of life. One of the most critical findings was that families with both parents involved in raising children (whether married or not) had significantly more confident mothers who were better equipped to discipline and raise their children effectively. This indicates that, while mothers have traditionally taken on the primary role of raising children, when they are supported, they can do so even more successfully. Further findings revealed that children raised in dual-parent households were ten times more likely to avoid drug use, graduate from high school, and continue on to college. Additionally, children with actively involved fathers were more likely to participate in extracurricular activities, showing that greater attention is placed on a child’s life when both parents are engaged.
Still, one doesn’t need a report, research, or intensive studies to understand the immeasurable importance of a father in a child’s life. What is even more obvious is the fact that having a father—who is present and engaged—is key. A father who is actively involved, nurturing, loving, and mentally equipped to meet his child’s psychological needs can have an enormous positive impact. When a dad is present and involved, transcending gender norms, he can help raise children who become better mothers, fathers, and spouses themselves. While parents can teach all sorts of lessons and advise children on what kind of adults and relationships they should seek, showing them through action is far more effective. When children see a father playing with dolls, treating mom as an equal partner, and raising both sons and daughters to be respectful, independent, and thriving adults, they are empowered to live as individuals, free from the constraints of gender norms and inequality.
Fathers are role models. They also teach little boys how to be real men and little girls what to look for in a man. Freud’s theory that girls tend to seek partners who resemble their fathers isn’t far from the truth. The reason is simple: what a child sees at home is what they come to consider normal, and what they strive to replicate throughout their lives. This normalcy can be either positive or negative, but it is primarily shaped by the presence of supportive and engaged parents.
There are millions of children growing up without their dads. However, this doesn’t mean they are at a disadvantage. A father figure can be an uncle, a grandfather, a brother, or a neighbor. The truth is that it’s not the quantity or the specific definition of people in a child’s life that matters most, but the quality of those who empower and nurture the child, taking on the roles of parenting. What children need is not just people to love them; they need individuals who will take an interest in them, who aren’t afraid to set boundaries, and who prioritize the child’s development over their own needs. Many single-mother households worry that their child is missing something by not having a father present. They fear that the lack of a father’s presence in a child’s life is more significant than anything else they can offer. While this can sometimes be true, many non-traditional households provide fatherly love in the absence of a biological father. How? By acknowledging that the father figure’s role—whether traditional or not—is important.
The importance of having a father in a child’s life should never pressure mothers or family members to include someone who isn’t healthy for the child. In other words, if the father brings an unhealthy environment, it’s better to have him absent than to claim he’s there for the sake of having a father figure. When considering a child’s future, it’s not just the presence of a father that matters but the presence of a father who adds value. If a father’s involvement breeds negativity, it’s likely to cause long-term emotional and psychological disruption for the child. Even so, in a subliminal way, this kind of father figure can still make a lasting positive impact on the child, who may choose a different path in order not to replicate their father’s mistakes.