Tips for Throwing an Engagement Party

party with friends

Today, there are practically a million excuses to throw a party. Got a promotion? Then you need a party to celebrate. Bought a new house? Of course, you need a housewarming party. Getting engaged? Well, then an engagement party becomes a necessary rite of passage. The following article will give you tips and hints for throwing an engagement party, as well as introduce you to the etiquette and heritage involved in these celebrations.

Engagement parties are meant to celebrate the proposed union of two people. Historically, engagement parties were thrown before the engagement was announced to the public. During these “routine” parties, it was customary for the father of the bride to announce to the guests that his daughter had received permission to marry, and the groom-to-be would be introduced. In Ancient Greece, these engagement parties were used to create contracts (or dowries) between the two families involved in the marriage. In other words, the guests in attendance did not know they were coming to an engagement party, and gifts were not part of the traditional celebration.

Today, engagement parties are typically held to celebrate an already announced engagement. Traditionally, these parties are hosted by the bride’s parents, and couples are encouraged to set up a registry for things they may want or desire. This is often a time when the families of the bride and groom meet one another for the first time, and people from all aspects of their lives are invited to join in on the festivities. Most often, couples register for gifts that will help them start their lives together. Since many couples are already living together by the time they get engaged, the gifts often double as housewarming gifts.

Engagement parties can also be hosted by close friends, family members, or colleagues who want to celebrate the happy news. Additionally, it’s becoming more and more common for the bride and groom-to-be to gather their friends and family for a party and make a surprise announcement of the engagement, hosting the party themselves.

According to wedding planners from Wedding Magazine, engagement parties should be held a few weeks to a month after the engagement has occurred. This is considered the “sweet spot,” when the stress of wedding planning hasn’t become an issue, and the couple is genuinely excited about sharing their news. One rule of thumb is that it’s considered good etiquette to invite people to your engagement party if you also plan to invite them to your wedding. This is just one reason why wedding planners encourage couples to work on the guest list early to avoid inadvertently hurting someone’s feelings.

Of course, if someone is hosting an engagement party for you, you don’t need to worry about inviting every attendee to your wedding. Often, co-workers will host engagement parties without expecting every guest to be invited to the wedding.

A Few Further Tips for Throwing an Engagement Party:

  • Keep it simple! There’s no need to rent out an expensive venue or expect guests to dress in their Sunday best. Make the event light and fun.
  • Keep it economical. Skip the 5-course meals and fancy wine, and instead celebrate with appetizers. Depending on your personality and venue, it is also not considered rude to throw a BYOB engagement party. The point is bringing people together.
  • Don’t expect or ask for gifts. Many people will be giving gifts at the wedding, so asking them to buy two gifts is a bit extreme and narcissistic.
  • If a friend wants to throw you a party, let them! If you want to plan a more personal, family-oriented gathering, go ahead, but try to keep it small so that both families can get acquainted.
  • Once you say “I will” or “Yes” to a proposal, decide if you want to keep it a secret or plan a “big reveal” party. A “big reveal” can alleviate stress for both you and your guests, especially concerning gifts. But be sure to consider the feelings of your parents and close family members first.

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