And for the record, ALL parents should know that everyone from the American Academy of Pediatrics to the Mayo Clinic are against co-sleeping due to the hazards that it can pose to your child. The question here is not for against bed sharing but when it becomes unnatural, wrong, or just plain weird. Is there an age where a child should not sleep with mom or dad? Does the gender of the child matter? Regardless of how it starts, and how you feel about it you know that at some point it has to end, right? But when? When are kids simply too old to sleep with mom and dad?

Let’s see what the experts have to say about allowing children to sleep with mom and dad.

In March of 2007, the New York Times published a research article on this very subject. The article believes that an older child sleeping with parents does not do enough to maintain a healthy separation between adults and children. And obviously, a 10 year old in the bed is quite a hindrance to martial intimacy. In the study, it suggested that children sleeping with parents can be responsible for destroying a marriage and even confusing children about their sexual identity.

Should a pubescent boy who wakes up every morning with an erection, be sleeping next to his mother? Should a young girl, perhaps one that is budding breasts or entering menstruation sleep next to her father? Most people would agree that allowing a 10 or 11-year-old child to sleep with a parent of the opposite sex is wrong or somehow taboo in today’s world. And outwardly, those who disagree with co-sleeping would likely be freaked out by such behavior. But to the family sharing the bed, all might seem cozy and completely non-sexual. However, it is slightly disturbing to understand WHY an older child would still WANT to sleep with their parents.

A study out of the University of Michigan showed that children who slept with their parents beyond the age of 2 many into the preteen years, were developmentally stunted and even faced years and years of sleep issues later in life. A poll conducted by Mothering dot come also showed that 40% of moms believe co-sleeping should end between the ages of 3 and 5, while 34% believed kids between 6 and 8 should be given the red light to the parental bedroom door. Around 24% believed that co sleeping shouldn’t occur to begin with.

According to the Family Law Association, differences in belief on co-sleeping especially as older, opposite sex parents are concerned is often a point of contention. And since there are no laws surrounding an age when children shouldn’t sleep in a parent’s bed, this becomes grey area. Normally, when it is brought to the attention of a family law attorney psychological evaluations of the child are ordered to see if there are any issues of foul play involved. And subsequently, it turns bonding moments and co-sleeping into an issue of sexuality. Which for most people, it is not.

Bottom line is that at some point your child will NOT sleep with you any longer. Every family has a different arrangement and set up in place. There are tons of families who fall asleep in the same bed watching television every night. There are other families who keep the marital or parental door completely locked and off limits. What needs to be addressed are the issues that surround the co sleeping. If they are developmental in nature as it pertains to older children, then something needs to be done. If they are matters of convenience based on house size or bed availability then there might not be a lot of options. What is most important is being cognizant of how ALL the parties’ involved parent, spouse, and child feel about the matter.

Still. And obviously, there comes a point in a parent child relationship when privacy should be respected and separation should begin. There also comes a time in a marriage where co-sleeping will greatly, if not gravely affect the marital relationship. So deciding when a child is too old to sleep with mom and dad becomes a judgment call.

From the outside, it might seem creepy for mother and son, or father and daughter or even daughter and mother and father and son to be sharing a bed into the pre-teen or teenage years. It’s certainly not ‘normal,’ at least as far as statistics show. But the closeness and ways that each and every family bond with one another are different, and every family has its own definition of what is right and what is wrong.

What do you think? Is there a certain age when children should no longer sleep with their parents?

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Making matters worse is that the pregnancy tests that claim to be able to accurately predict pregnancy days earlier than all the rest, while accurate, are definitely no sure thing. In fact, with a negative test, the makers paste a clear label that directs you to wait a few more days and take another one. (Frustrating and Expensive) And those happy well-wishers, who are aware of your secret mission to conceive, will tell you just don’t think about it! To which, all you can is say HA! How can you not think, wonder and worry if you are about to embark on the journey of parenthood? How is it possible to try to build a life inside you and then be forced to wait to know for sure if it is there? The emotions during this waiting period are sure to run high and you will likely be more in tune with your body than ever before, searching, sometimes desperately, for the symptoms of conception.

This brings us to the next point. Are there ‘symptoms of conception?’

The answer, clearly’certainly’ is YES!

The problem is that in very, very early pregnancy you have to be able to separate fact from fiction and decide whether what you are feeling, is a symptom of conception or one that is being produced through your thoughts. There is such a thing as psychological pregnancy where the desire to conceive is so deep, that women often begin developing the signs of pregnancy.

The best way to figure this whole wicked puzzle out is to sit back and relax. By now, you should know your body and have a pretty good idea what is ‘normal’ for you in the days leading to menstruation. Take a few minutes each and every day to breathe deep breaths and sort of ‘connect’ with your body. This will also help you to feel more relaxed and perhaps a little less impatience.

Next up, is to understand the process of conception. A sperm in the reproductive organs can live 4 to 5 days before being fertilized. So if you have planned sex around ovulation, it doesn’t mean that you are going to conceive the next day. Even ovulation tests that look for hormonal plunges that signal ovulation are not an exact science of when ovulation occurs. The sperm has to travel to the egg, fertilize it and then the happily and newly paired union has to make their way into the uterus. Once there, conception STILL has not occurred. The perfect pH balance of your uterus, along with a surge of hormones will allow this happy couple to implant into the uterine lining. Once implantation occurs, the female body has two choices. Either begin producing the pregnancy hormone called HCG, which will hold the fertilized egg in place – or not. When the body decides to keep the egg and sperm combo, and they implant firmly into the uterine wall conception has occurred.

But wait! The next step where genetic splitting begins taking place around 2 days after fertilization is another key to successful conception. Often if there is anything wrong with the developing embryo, the human body will recognize it and women will experience a period. (Perhaps a few days later than normally). This isn’t necessarily a miscarriage. However, if you take pregnancy tests very early, there is a slim chance you will know that you were pregnant.

The following are the physical symptoms of conception that you may (or may not) feel at the time of conception.

Many women feel a strong pinching sensation in the lower abdomen. (Right above the hairline) This is thought to be during implantation, and you may even experience a slight amount of discharge or bleeding at this time. This doesn’t necessarily feel like period cramps, but more like you are being pinched on the inside.

You can also feel a fullness or hardness in the lower abdomen almost immediately upon conception. Even though the baby is still microscopic, hormonal changes alter the feel of your uterus and this fullness can occur. Some women may also feel like they are about to get a urinary tract infection.

Tiredness, can occur almost immediately for many women. If you suddenly need lengthy afternoon naps, you might suspect that you are pregnant even if it is a week before your period is due. It takes a lot of energy for your body to get pregnant, which can leave you exhausted. As soon as HCG starts pumping through your body, which is normally the same day as implantation occurs you might feel hungrier than normal or experience weird cravings for food. This is your body simply telling you what you need.

One confusing symptom of conception is crampiness, increased discharge, and pelvic pain. This can feel very much like you are about to get your period, but is actually your body going through the changes caused by pregnancy. This is nothing to worry about and is normal for most women. In fact, one of the reasons so many women think they aren’t pregnant is because early pregnancy feels very much like you are to start menstruating.

Last but certainly not least are the breast and cervical changes. For some women, breast tenderness and a darkening around the nipples occurs immediately, even before a missed period. Additionally, a doctor can look at your cervix, which turns bluish during pregnancy even before you have missed a period and likely tell if you are pregnant or not.

Even so, the best thing to do is to sit back and wait. Enjoy this two-week mystery time in your life with the knowing that at any moment, your life could be changed forever. Try your best not to feel stressed out or overly anxious, and continue with your life as normal. The bottom line is you will know whether you are pregnant or not soon enough.

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Diarrhea is always a symptom of an underlying problem and not a disease in itself. It can range from occasional loose stools to a continuous watery stream of feces. Unfortunately, many potential causes exist, and determining the cause may require collaboration between you and your veterinarian.

One of the most common causes of diarrhea is intestinal upset. A sudden change in diet, an unfamiliar treat, or feeding table scraps can trigger diarrhea. If the diarrhea is not severe and your dog continues to feel and act normally, it can often be resolved at home. Withholding food for 24 hours allows the dog’s digestive system to settle (while ensuring continued water intake). After 24 hours, you can offer small amounts of a bland diet, such as white rice and chicken. If the diarrhea subsides, you can gradually reintroduce their original diet and transition slowly to the new one. However, if diarrhea does not improve or worsens, veterinary treatment may be required.

To avoid intestinal upsets from dietary changes, all food transitions should occur over several days, allowing your dog to adjust to the new food. For the first three days, feed ¼ of the new diet and ¾ of the old food. If your dog is doing well, continue with half of each for another three days, then transition to ¼ old food and ¾ new food for an additional three days. This gradual approach helps minimize intestinal upset and reduces the risk of diarrhea.

Although many dogs receive table scraps, care must be taken to ensure that human foods are not too rich for their systems. Fatty foods can cause diarrhea and vomiting, and may also lead to pancreatitis, an inflammation of the pancreas that can result in chronic digestive issues. Additionally, while dogs enjoy many types of meat we consume, the form they are accustomed to (in their dog food) is highly processed. Giving large amounts of meat from human plates can be too rich and cause diarrhea. It’s also crucial to remember that dogs should NEVER be given turkey or chicken bones, as these can splinter and puncture the stomach and intestines.

Intestinal Parasites Can Cause Diarrhea in Dogs

Intestinal parasites are a common cause of diarrhea in dogs. Various types of parasites can infect dogs, and diarrhea is often one of the most frequent symptoms of such infections.

Roundworms are among the most commonly seen intestinal parasites in puppies. Although roundworms are not typically active in most adult dogs, puppies are particularly susceptible to their presence and effects. Dogs ingest roundworm eggs from contaminated soil, and puppies can receive them from their mothers. As the eggs hatch in the intestine, the larvae are carried to the lungs via the bloodstream. From the lungs, the worms crawl up the windpipe, causing gagging and coughing before returning to the intestine to mature. Roundworms can grow up to seven inches long and appear spaghetti-like—long and thin. Signs of infestation include a pot-bellied appearance, poor growth, and a rough, dull coat. Diarrhea and vomiting may also occur, and the dog may expel worms in their stool or vomit. If unchecked, these worms can lead to pneumonia, intestinal obstructions, and death.

Hookworms can affect dogs of all ages but are most common in warmer, humid climates. They are transmitted through the ingestion of contaminated feces. Mature hookworms attach to the intestinal lining and feed on the blood supply. In pregnant dogs, hookworms can migrate into the fetuses, infesting the puppies even before birth. Hookworms can be particularly devastating for puppies, leading to severe anemia, weakness, and bloody diarrhea.

While not a worm, Giardia is an intestinal parasite caused by a single-celled organism that resides in the intestines of infected animals. Recent research shows that Giardia is present in up to 11% of the general pet population and as many as 50% of puppies. It can be transmitted from pet to pet, through contaminated feed or water, and through soil. Pets who frequent dog parks, doggy daycare, or kennels are at a higher risk for infection. The most common symptom of Giardia is diarrhea of varying severity, although many infected animals may show no symptoms for extended periods, making routine testing vital.

Coccidia is another single-celled organism that infects the small intestine of dogs. Some dogs with coccidia show no signs of illness, while others may experience severe bouts of watery stools and bloody diarrhea, vomiting, depression, fever, and even death due to severe dehydration. These serious side effects are most common in puppies and adult dogs suffering from other illnesses.

Diarrhea in puppies is particularly concerning, as it is often the first symptom of severe and potentially fatal viral diseases such as parvovirus, coronavirus, and distemper.

Parvovirus is most commonly found in young, unvaccinated dogs or those who have not completed their vaccination series. The virus attacks and kills the cells in the intestinal lining, preventing the dog from absorbing nutrients and liquids. Dogs with parvo typically develop a high fever, lethargy, and loss of appetite. Profuse, liquid diarrhea occurs as intestinal damage progresses, and the stool may be foul-smelling or contain blood. This condition can lead to severe dehydration, shock, and death, often proving fatal even with aggressive treatment. Vaccination is the best prevention against parvo.

Like parvo, the coronavirus is a highly contagious virus that causes gastrointestinal issues. While adult dogs may experience mild symptoms and recover within days without treatment, puppies can develop far more serious infections and complications. Signs of coronavirus are similar to parvo, including profuse watery diarrhea, which, if left untreated, can cause severe dehydration and secondary complications.

Canine distemper virus is a devastating, highly contagious disease that primarily affects unvaccinated dogs and puppies. The virus typically targets the brain, intestinal tract, and upper respiratory system. A high fever is usually the first sign of infection, accompanied by coughing, sneezing, and green nasal discharge. As the virus progresses, it affects the intestinal tract, causing vomiting and dark, tarry diarrhea. Eventually, the virus can travel to the brain and spinal cord, leading to seizures and uncontrollable twitching.

There is no cure for distemper; medical treatment focuses on controlling symptoms and supporting the dog’s body during the infection. Even with aggressive treatment, distemper is often fatal, and survivors may suffer lifelong neurological issues. Vaccination is the best way to prevent distemper.

Other causes of acute diarrhea in dogs can include bacterial infections (such as salmonella and E. coli), toxin exposure (from insecticides and lead), and even stress.

Treatment for acute diarrhea in dogs focuses on diagnosing and correcting the underlying issue. If your dog has had loose stools for less than 24 hours but is otherwise acting normally (with a normal energy level and eating and drinking normally), you may choose a conservative approach and monitor their condition. However, if your dog shows any additional signs of distress or has had increasing amounts of diarrhea for any length of time, a visit to the veterinarian is required.

Your veterinarian will take a full history of your dog’s condition, including when the diarrhea first started and any possible precipitating factors. After a comprehensive physical exam, your veterinarian may recommend:

Fecal testing: A sample of the diarrhea will be obtained and checked for evidence of parasites such as roundworms and coccidia. An antigen test may also be performed on the fecal sample to check for Giardia.

Fecal cultures may be recommended to test for the presence of bacteria in the stool, such as salmonella.

Blood work: Blood chemistry tests assess various body systems and provide insights into the health of your dog’s major organs, such as the kidneys and liver. A complete blood count (CBC) evaluates the components of your dog’s blood, including red and white blood cells and platelets. The CBC can help diagnose or rule out infection as a potential cause of your dog’s diarrhea.

Parvo test: In puppies, a parvovirus antigen test may be performed. This quick “snap” test uses a small sample of feces, with results typically available within minutes. The sooner parvo is diagnosed and treated, the better the chance of a favorable outcome for your puppy.

X-rays: Radiographs of your dog’s abdomen may be recommended to rule out potential intestinal obstructions or foreign bodies that may have been ingested.

Treatment for your dog’s diarrhea will depend on what your vet suspects might be causing it. In cases of intestinal upset, a bland diet may be all that’s needed to settle

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Many schools of thought about marriage seem to indicate that couples should see divorce as a consequence in a marriage. If you are constantly aware that there could be some reactions from your actions, divorce being one of them, you will be less likely to stray from the straight and arrow path, right? And by realizing the possibility of divorce, you will always be able to negotiate through the muddy waters of marriage with some clarity. The problem with this line of thinking is that it creates quite a bit of insecurity in a marriage. If you are constantly worrying or thinking about the fact that you could end up divorced, or that your partner could ultimately leave you you will proceed with such caution that you will fail to be authentic. This is no way to be married. (At least no good way to be). And the bottom line is that marriage should be about security and stability, not insecurity and sporadic behavior.

Most people, use the threat of divorce for the sheer ‘shut-up’ factor. They know that when things aren’t going their way or that there is a problem looming; they can avoid confrontation and argument by simply saying they want a divorce. This works especially well if the person using the threat realizes that the spouse they are threatening will shrivel at the mere mention of the ‘D’ word. Suffice it to say, if threatening divorce works’.and you always back down from your position or from the argument when the word is hailed, you have a part in teaching your partner this behavior. And no, this doesn’t make it any more right. It actually indicates that there is a major problem in your relationship that has much more to do with respect and compassion than it does the ‘issue’ at hand.

Essentially, many people use the divorce card as a succinct way to ‘win’ or end an argument.

Yet, there is another factor as well. Often, when people are unhappy in a marriage they displace their feelings on the other person. For instance, when someone is cheating, they often accuse the partner of cheating. When it comes to threatening divorce, it very well could be that your partner is trying to plant ideas in YOUR head, because the divorce is what they really want. Lots of people are unhappy in their relationships, and even with no valid reasons would be happier without the ring and ties of marriage. So by constantly threatening divorce, they are looking for ways to justify how they feel, or hopefully set the wheels in motion (in your head) with the hopes that they wont be the bad guy.

Unfortunately, it is difficult at best to understand or decide which motive your partner has in threatening divorce. ‘

The best advice that you can be given is to understand this. First of all, idle threats and intimidation WILL NOT work in a marriage. You might as well be divorced. The emotional ramifications of being treated like this will stymie your happiness and your growth as a person. So what you need to do if you are on the receiving end of these threats is to just once say, ‘Okay!’ ‘Move out!’ ‘Let’s do it!’ And mean it. Perhaps a trial separation will help you realize that the marriage isn’t healthy. But more important by calling this person on their threats, you force them to pay attention to what THEY are saying, and stand up for yourself in the process. Sure, it could be scary to respond in this manner, however if you are never able to move past the issues at hand or discuss problems in your marriage to the point of resolution, you really have nothing to lose.

Depending on your partners personality set, they may react in numerous ways. They may try to cast blame on you, or they may back peddle a little (or a lot) realizing that they have threatened divorce one too many times. Either way, it could be a positive changing point in your relationship.

Yet, you should realize that what you have to say, discuss and what you feel should be heralded as important. When someone loves you, they shouldn’t have to resort to childish tactics of making threats to get their way. And just as divorce is a consequence for improper actions in a marriage, calling his or her bluff is an appropriate consequence for dealing with a spouse who constantly threatens divorce.

The bottom line is this! Threatening divorce is not the way to deal with issues in the marriage. Eventually the person on the receiving end of these threats will tire of them, and will lose their fear of being divorced in lieu of being free from this sort of treatment from someone they love. Yes, there are certain issues within your marriage that may warrant divorce, or the threat of divorce. But it isn’t something that healthy couples say every time they argue. The best advice is to get help as a couple or simply get out of the relationship.

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Accusing someone of cheating is not something that should be done in jest or in anger. Just because the two of you have hit a lull in the relationship, or experiencing some sort of problems doesn’t automatically mean that your partner has resorted to cheating. In fact, the misplaced accusation, and the undeserved suspicion can easily become the end of a promising relationship if you are wrong, especially if it becomes an overused go-to response to any sort of dissention in the relationship.

Essentially, when you accuse someone of cheating – you are accusing him or her of lying to you. You are accusing them of being dishonest on the most primitive foundation of your relationship. The most natural and immediate response when you accuse someone wrongly of lying to you is for them to become angered and defensive. So often, although you may make the accusation because you are trying to figure out what is wrong in the relationship, you may inadvertently make matters much worse. Why? Because dishonesty and lying and cheating top the list of character flaws, and a false accusation – especially if it is not based on any sort of resounding proof – is attacking the character of your partner at a root level.

Additionally, when a partner becomes defensive or feels like you are attacking them – most people will react in an equally hurtful matter which does more to obscure the truth than reveal it.

So what should you do if you suspect a partner is cheating?

Before spouting off accusations and risk putting the relationship in further turmoil, do some homework. There are normally some pretty telltale signs of cheating. Have your partners habits changed profusely? Are they using their cell phone more? Are they more secretive than normal? Are they working longer hours at work? Do you notice discrepancies in some of the things they are doing that just do not seem to make sense? Some other signs that your partner may be cheating are going out with ‘friends’ more, changing their personal habits – such as wearing perfume or cologne when they normally don’t, working out excessively and an increase (due to guilt) or decrease in their desire to have sex with you. Have they suddenly been accusing YOU of infidelity without any real reason to do so?

If you notice sudden changes like these, then you might want to try on your investigative hat before making blind accusations. Check cell phone records; see if they are really where they say they are. In other words, find something, anything concrete that you can use to verify your feelings. Then, and only then – confront them with some of the facts so they realize you aren’t basing your accusation on personal insecurity. Then, pay close attention to their response. Are they defensive? Shocked? Surprised? Do they become immediately indignant, angry and begin blaming you for the things that are going wrong in the relationship? If their relationship seems out of character, or somehow ‘off’ or unreasonable, then your suspicions may be right. Even so, it is a very rare person that will actually admit that they are having an affair. Most people hide the affair, which adds to the excitement and adrenaline rush of the infidelity – until they are literally caught in the act. So if your partner IS cheating – they likely won’t admit it.

If you immediately think your spouse is cheating when the relationship seems off-kilter, you also have to ask yourself if this is more an internal response than one based on your partner. For instance, if you have been in a relationship that ended with infidelity, or have been otherwise personally affected by infidelity, there is a good chance that your internal hurt and pain may make you jump to conclusions of cheating too quickly. And the more you think about something, ruminate about the possibilities, the more the mind can begin to make something ‘look true,’ that really isn’t. Unfortunately, when emotions are so deeply tied to a situation it can be very difficult to step aside long enough to make common sense decisions.

The best way to confront a situation, or to accuse a partner of infidelity is to do so calmly. Try to view the commentary as a conversation rather than a conversation. Choose a time when both of you are feeling calm, and when there aren’t many outside distractions to deal with. And definitely have the conversation in private. You should also work hard to keep your emotions in check during the conversation. Most importantly, breach the subject by using YOUR feelings, rather than being accusatory. Instead of saying, “You always come home late from work, say “I miss you when you come home late for work and we don’t get to spend time together.” Own how YOU feel – rather than immediately put your partner on the defensive. You should also help your spouse understand that you are confused or concerned about the relationship and that you want to work things out.

This doesn’t mean that you will necessarily get the truth. However, the best way to fix things in a relationship is to talk about them together. And just remember, that your partner should be innocent until proven guilty.

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Why Furniture isn’t Created Equally

Life is all about choices, and furniture is no different. Manufacturers decide on the market for which they want to cater, and then make their products accordingly. This doesn’t mean that a manufacturer who is aiming at budget items consciously decides to turn out bad workmanship. In fact expensive items may be badly made simply because upmarket, classy designs often incorporate more difficult joints and features that take experience and skill to produce. Inexpensive furniture may be well or badly made; it’s up to you to recognize degrees of quality.

In fact it is essential that you check all furniture before you buy it, however cheap or expensive it may be. As they say in the classics, the quality of a Monday item and a Friday item out of the same factory can vary tremendously. For example, you may have two seemingly identical tables to choose from, but one wobbles ever so slightly. Or perhaps you are buying an upholstered couch, and notice that the piping on the one has not been as neatly stitched as the other.

Comparing Different Types of Wooden Furniture

There are many different ways that wooden furniture is designed and made. A simple differentiation is that some items are engineered in a factory while others are carefully crafted by hand. Hand crafted furniture is usually a lot more expensive, simply because of the man-hours that go into making it. But weigh up the pros and cons, because a lot of factory-made quality furniture will look just as good and last just as long, without making the same sized dent in your pocket.

Also consider that there are many different ways that pieces of wood can be joined together. Some cheaper tables and chairs, for example, may be screwed together, while traditional designs will incorporate carefully cut, traditional joints. When you compare different items (irrespective of price differences), examine the joints. Even two simple kists – which are really just oversized, attractive storage boxes – may be assembled in totally different ways. For instance, one might simply be glued and pinned or screwed together; while the other is made with traditional, wedge-shaped dovetail joints that interlock and form a solid bond without the need for wood glue and metal fasteners.

When it comes to wooden items of furniture, it isn’t just the design that differentiates one type of item from the other. It is also the variety of wood that is used to make each item.

The two basic types of wood found in nature are softwood that comes from cone-bearing coniferous trees with prickly needles, like firs and pine trees; and hardwood, the type that is cut from a wide variety of deciduous trees. This can be confusing, since not all hardwoods are particularly hard, and some softwoods are in fact relatively hard, even harder than some hardwoods. For instance while ordinary pine is commonly used for mass produced furniture (including tables, chairs and beds), Oregon pine is a lot stronger and is often used to make better quality items. Douglas fir, which is another variety of softwood, tends to be hard, about the same consistency as European walnut, cherry wood and American elm.

Generally furniture made from hardwood is more expensive, possibly since it is more commonly used to make period-style traditional items, which of course require a lot more work. They are also not commonly mass produced (which generally brings down the price per unit).

Another factor is that not all wooden furniture is made from solid wood; many manufacturers specialize in making cabinets, tables and so on from manmade board, and many use veneers to finish items. This gives the impression of a solid wood surface, when it is in fact just a thin layer of wood that covers a much cheaper material.

A particularly popular man-made board is medium density fiberboard (MDF) which is beautifully smooth and easy to carve. Well made furniture from this material, if creatively designed and given a top quality finish, can compete with some of the most beautiful items made from solid wood – although it is true that many people want their wooden furniture to be made of solid wood and not from some sort of manmade fiber.

Finish is another factor to consider when buying wooden or solid board furniture. There are loads of options, the most important factor probably being the ability of the finish to withstand wear and tear, and staining. But having said that, surfaces that have been French polished have to be carefully maintained, because this is one surface that won’t withstand spills and scratches, yet furniture that has been finished this way is usually very pricey. So it’s not that easy to set hard and fast rules.

Comparing Beds and Mattresses

One item of furniture we all need is some sort of bed, with a good quality mattress that allows us to get a good night’s sleep. Some beds are available without mattresses, although most incorporate a base that is designed to be used to support the mattress and elevate you off the ground at the same time.

Beds with bases are commonly made of wood or metal, and include some gorgeous four poster and brass bedstead designs. Leather beds are also becoming a popular choice. In these instances, the bed itself is a feature, adding to the design and style of the room. Sleep sets, on the other hand, are generally more practical and comfort-orientated, but generally plain. However while many comprise simply the base and mattress, others do have bed heads, or can be installed with custom-made bed heads. So in this case you will be considering not only price and quality, but also what the bed will look like in your bedroom – which should be your personal haven.

Then there’s the choice of mattress. Of all the items of furniture in any home, mattresses are not the same, even if they look identical once the bedding is in place! They range from cheap foam, to new-age “memory foam”, and from regular sprung to specially-manufactured orthopaedic mattresses.

Alternatively you might prefer to opt for a cotton-stuffed futon that may be used on just about any type or style of base.

At the end of the day, whatever furniture you are going to buy should be of the best quality you can afford. As long as you are aware that not all furniture is created equally, you should be in a position to evaluate quality as well as value for money.

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Even among professional grillmiesters, it is appalling to me how many do not understand why meat should rest before it is served. More delicious meat has been destroyed by this error than by any other mistake cooks have made in the entire known history of cooking. If you never learn anything else about food, please commit to memory the fact that most meat needs to rest before serving. Here’s why:

Meat is composed of protein chains (coils, actually) made up of amino acids. Amino acids, when heated, undergo a change called denaturing, which means their basic configuration changes somewhat, along with some of their physical characteristics. In the case of cooking, the protein chains contract, exerting pressure on the water contained within the molecules. Water is not compressible, so it has to go somewhere. One of the laws of physics is that non-compressable fluids will move from areas of high pressure to areas of low pressure, in this case, a lower temperature. So what happens is all the juice moves from the surface areas of the meat, to the center, where it is cooler. The ‘sizzle’ you hear when meat is placed on a hot grill is some of the juices being forcefully expelled from the tissues before they have time to move to the center. This is not necessarily a good thing, but a small amount is unavoidable.

While we are cooking our cut of meat to an internal temperature of 180°F, the outside tissues can reach 200°F or higher. So, when we remove the meat from the heat, most of the juice is at the interior end of the protein fibers. If you then immediately slice into the muscle fibers, exposing them to cooler air, the juices will rush out in a flood, much like slicing into the side of a full plastic coke bottle. 15 to 20% of the flavor goes out with the juice. And the damage is irreparable. Simply dipping the meat in the juice as you eat will not place it back in the fibers where it belongs. The meat is permanently ruined.

When meat is removed from the heat, and cools, the process is reversed. The first thing that happens, is that the internal temperature of the meat continues to rise after cooking has stopped, due  thermodynamics (called Carry-Over Cooking by professional grillers). Now the juice will move back to the outside of the meat, as it cools, and the internal temperature rises, evenly distributing the juice and flavors throughout the meat. When the meat is sliced, the juices will tend to stay in the meat where they belong, due to surface tension (another physics principle). You now have a moist, succulent piece of meat that has the maximum flavor possible. Another benefit of resting meat is that it allows the temperature of the meat to even out, so that the outside is not hotter than the inside. This will also greatly improve the flavor of your culinary masterpiece.

You can prove this to yourself very easily. Get a good cut of meat that you really enjoy eating (boneless if possible) and cut it into 6 even pieces. Cook these 6 pieces equally, at the same time, and place them on 6 separate plates. Now, cut into one immediately and observe the results, and taste. You will most likely wind up with a gush of juice in the plate.  Next, slice into the other cuts at intervals of 3 minutes each, and observe the results. You will find that the longer the meat sets, the more juice it retains, and the more flavorful it will be.

The amount of resting time depends on the size of the piece of meat, and the temperature it was cooked to, but even thin cuts like chicken breasts and hamburgers benefit from 5 minutes of rest before serving. The times are not exact, but a good rule of thumb is that steaks, chicken pieces or breasts, burgers, pork chops, and fish should all rest for at least 5-10 minutes before serving. For larger cuts such as roasts, turkeys, and hams, 20-30 minutes is about right. Be sure to place the meat in a juice-catching tray and cover loosely with foil.

The next time you see juices flowing from a steak that you have ordered, you will know that it has been abused, and you can impress the cooking staff with your new-found knowledge.  You can proceed with confidence in explaining to them why meat should rest before it is served.

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You might ask “Isn’t non-alcoholic wine just fruit juice?” That is a common misconception, and could not be further from the truth. Non-alcoholic wines begin as regular wine. The difference is that they undergo an extra stage of processing to render them non-alcoholic, while retaining all the flavor and characteristics of the original wine. One of two processes does this. The wine undergoes either distillation, or filtration. Both of these remove the alcohol without damaging the wine itself.

Another common misconception is that non-alcoholic wines contain no alcohol. Non-Alcoholic is not the same as Alcohol-Free. It would be very cost prohibitive to remove every bit of alcohol. To be classified as non-alcoholic, a beverage cannot contain more than ½ of 1% alcohol. Therefore, if your objections to alcohol are moral or personal, then non-alcoholic wines would not be a good option for you. Likewise. if you are taking medications that would react with alcohol, then non-alcoholic wines are not going to work for you. In addition, non-alcoholic wines are subject to the same regulations as regular wine, meeting you have to be of legal age to buy it.

Are these wines any good? It depends on who is rating them. As in all wine ratings, it depends on the taster’s expertise, personal preferences, and what kind of mood they are in. It has been my personal experience that, while no non-alcoholic wine will ever challenge a top-quality French Bordeaux, there are many that are perfectly drinkable, and certainly much better than none at all. Most of us are not financially well-heeled enough to drink first-class wines all the time, anyway. The majority of wine consumed with meals is Table Wine quality. The non-alcoholic versions are every bit as good, especially in some of the better brands.

Some of the top Non-Alcoholic Winesbrands are:

Ariel Wines-these are my absolute #1 choices for kickless wines. This company rocked the wine world in 1986 when their non-alcoholic entry won the Gold Medal over all the other regular wines at the Los Angeles County Fair. In the 1990s, endorsements from world famous chef Dr. Graham Kerr, led to a wider acceptance of non-alcoholic wines as a healthier alternative. They now distribute over 65,000 cases per year worldwide. The company started out with just one wine-Ariel Blanc, and it is still one of their best-sellers. All of their wines are under $20.00 per bottle. Here is their current line-up:

Ariel Blanc -a crisp white Chardonnay-style wine with aromas of jasmine, floral and lilac. It has flavors of lychee, peach and lavender, with a nice acidity and just a hint of sweetness. Great with seafood and chicken.

Brut Cuvèe -a sparkling Chardonnay-style that can hold its own against any California champagnes. Crisp, light and slightly floral with overtones of toasted oak. This is a winner.

Ariel Chardonnay -a wonderful blend of tropical fruitiness, with the character of oak barrel aging. This wine has tastes of buttery baked apples, with butterscotch overtones, and a heady French toasted oak bouquet.

White Zinfandel -a light rosè with enticing flavors of boysenberry, raspberry and strawberries.

Rouge -a blend of Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot and Zinfandel, this wine offers mesmerizing aromas of cranberries, strawberries and plums, with an excellent balance of subtle tannins, and a dry finish. This is my favorite with spicy foods like Mexican, or Italian cuisine.

Ariel Merlot -this is a robust wine with assertive flavors of raspberry, cassis and wild cherries, with pronounced aromas of white chocolate, cloves and oak. Bold enough to support roast beef, grilled steaks or even roast pork.

Cabernet Sauvignon -an absolutely wonderful bold wine with the aromas of black currants, cherry, blueberries, and chocolate, balanced with soft tannins and a crisp, dry finish. This is one of my favorites with chili, enchiladas, and carne asada.

If you are wanting a higher-dollar wine, then you need look no further than the Vandalia Wine Company. They only make one wine at a time, currently a cabernet sauvignon. But it will rival any other California cabernet on the market, with or without alcohol. It’s a bit more pricey at around $25.00 per bottle, but, as in most things, you get what you pay for.

Other companies that produce non-alcoholic wines are Fre, by Sutter Wineries, and Carl Jung. They both produce very drinkable varieties of Zinfandel, Merlot, Cabernets and Chardonnays. I have not personally tried any of these, but they get good ratings at most tastings.

A word about cooking with NA wines: there are many fats and other components in food that are only soluble in alcohol. There are dishes where NA wine will not produce the desired effect, such as in Coq au Vin, or Boef Burgundie. However, when you cook with wine, the majority of the alcohol evaporates, so you are just as well off using regular wine. NA wines may be all right for deglazing, but for most cooking, there is no substitute for the real thing.

On the up-side, NA wines are much healthier that standard wine, and have all the same benefits. An 8 oz. glass of red NA wine only has around 53 calories, compared to 100+ calories for a normal red wine. Good news for the weight-conscious crowd.

My advice is to sample a lot of different varieties and brands. You will eventually find the ones that fill your needs. And when you do…..enjoy.

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The challenge with wedding planning is that you can’t always estimate how much each aspect of your wedding will cost in advance. It’s not until you’re deep into organizing that the true costs of each part become clear. So, before you do anything else, set your budget.

Set the Budget

Before you begin planning your wedding, you should know exactly how much money you’re working with. Take note of what you’ve saved up, and talk to the other parties involved, such as your parents or your partner’s parents, to see how much they will contribute. This is the time to ask for specific amounts.

Sometimes, families choose to finance a particular aspect of the wedding—like the catering or the venue. In such cases, make sure you know exactly which parts they want to finance and what their budget is for those areas.

Katie from Orla James agrees: “It’s easy to get carried away when planning your wedding. You budget a certain amount in one area, see something you love that costs twice as much, and slip up. Then, other areas end up suffering. You have to be vigilant!”

Make a Priority List

Once you have a budget, start listing all the things you want for your wedding. Think about what’s most important to you—whether it’s catering, the wedding dress, or the venue—and prioritize these items. Assign a percentage of your budget to each one.

This is perhaps the most important part of budgeting, so take your time. Keep your budget flexible enough to spend more on top priorities without overshooting your overall limit. However, be strict enough to maintain control. You can adjust spending by shifting funds from lower-priority items to higher ones.

Remember, your budget is there to help you control spending without detracting from your dream wedding. Striking the right balance is key to success.

Picking the Right Location and Theme

Some locations and themes are inherently more expensive than others. For example, a grand wedding in a popular ballroom in London with a five-course menu won’t come cheap. On the other hand, a simple ceremony in the countryside will likely be much more affordable. You could save money on the venue and theme, then use those savings to splurge on your wedding dress or entertainment. It’s all about setting your priorities and knowing where to allocate your funds.

Guest List Size

Your guest list size will directly influence many of your costs. Food, drinks, seating, décor, and even the venue are all affected by the number of guests you invite. The guest list is your most adjustable cost factor, and reducing it can help you stay on budget. If your menu is driving up costs, for instance, a smaller guest list can help balance the budget. These small savings across various categories can add up significantly.

Date and Time

When planning your wedding, don’t forget to consider the date and time. Believe it or not, there is a wedding season, and during peak times, everything tends to be more expensive. Additionally, an evening wedding is usually pricier than an afternoon one, as it requires more lighting, food, and drinks. Choosing the right time and date can help you meet your budget goals.

Staying on Budget

It’s important to remember that every dollar counts. You might think that spending an extra dollar per person on catering won’t make a big difference, but it can add up quickly.

Re-evaluating your budget periodically is a good idea. You might discover that stationery costs more than you expected. If that happens, you could eliminate the cost by switching to digital invitations or adjust the budget to accommodate the increase by cutting back on entertainment. These are the types of decisions you’ll be making regularly. Don’t feel rushed—take your time and make thoughtful choices.

Article by: Sarah from Orla James, who has been dreaming of all things wedding since the big question was popped six months ago. Now, as she plans her own wedding, she writes content for wedding blogs. Lucky enough to live in sunny Worthing, if you want to find her, she’ll be at the beach.

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Today, the world for children and teens is vastly different, almost unrecognizable. The internet and smartphones have transformed communication, creating the illusion of greater connectivity. Yet, many parents worry that the ways their kids use the internet could lead them into risky situations. It’s not uncommon for teens to stay glued to their phones, even during family dinners, further complicating efforts to stay connected in meaningful ways.

As parents, we want our children to grow into responsible, aware, and compassionate adults, which requires an element of trust. However, monitoring your child’s digital activity is essential, even if it feels like an invasion of privacy or sparks some resistance. Monitoring your child’s activity in the digital world is a necessary step, and here’s how to approach it effectively.

Establishing Clear Guidelines

The first step is to hold a sit-down meeting with your kids. Be transparent about the internet’s benefits and risks, explaining that while it’s a powerful tool, it can also be a place where people misrepresent themselves. Clearly outline the rules, including your right, as a parent, to track their smartphone and monitor their online activity. This may involve requiring them to share usernames and passwords.

Be prepared for resistance—this conversation may not be easy. Stay firm but fair, and clearly explain the consequences of breaking the rules, such as losing phone privileges. Setting expectations upfront fosters mutual understanding and accountability.

Tools for Monitoring Digital Devices

In the interest of mutual respect, it’s best to inform your child before installing tracking apps on their phone. However, if discretion is necessary, numerous apps are available to track smartphones at varying levels of detail. Basic apps use the phone’s GPS to show its location, allowing you to verify if your teen is where they claim to be. More advanced apps provide access to contacts, call logs, visited websites, and text messages. If something seems off, such as an unfamiliar number in their call history, a reverse phone lookup service can help identify who your child is communicating with.

For laptops and home computers, most modern operating systems include built-in parental controls. These allow you to set up restricted user accounts for your child, limiting access to certain websites. This is particularly effective for younger children or shared computers. Place computers in high-traffic areas of the home to discourage visits to inappropriate sites. Additional software can record all computer activity or allow real-time monitoring from another device. While these measures may feel intrusive, they are effective for ensuring safety, especially if there have been past issues.

Monitoring devices outside the home, such as library computers or a friend’s laptop, is more challenging. However, with access to usernames and passwords, you can still check social media accounts and email for suspicious activity.

The internet poses real dangers for children, from cyberbullying to online predators. While granting some privacy is a key part of parenting, ensuring your child’s safety is the top priority. By setting clear rules and using monitoring tools thoughtfully, you can strike a balance between trust and protection.

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