What to Say When You Propose Marriage

So, you want to get married. And no matter how hard you try to come up with the right words that describe the exact sentiment you are feeling, the bottom line is you have no idea what to say when you propose marriage. Of course there is the obvious, “Will you marry me,” but is that really enough to punctuate such a monumental event in your life? You want your marriage proposal to be something special that you and your spouse can look back on happily in 20 years. It definitely shouldn’t be a moment for America’s Funniest Home Videos. For those of you that are tongue tied, here are 5 expert tips to make your marriage proposal both memorable and unique.

Firstly, think about what the person means to you. You are asking her (or him) to be your life partner, not for just a date. This decision likely took some hard thinking on your part and there has to be reasons WHY you chose this person and want to marry them in the first place. Avoid the shallow and obvious reasons like the fact that you have been living together for 5 years, have a child together, or think they are simply great. Instead, be specific about truly unique qualities this person has that make you confident you want to spend your life with them. Women truly dig this type of stuff that shows the man in their life is thoughtful, appreciative and is paying attention.

Talk About Your Life Together

You also need to talk about the future. Everyone is different, but most people when deciding to marry have some idea of what they want their future to look like. Is it a yard full of kids, with 2 Labradors running amuck that you fancy for your future? Do you see the two of you growing old on a front porch swing rocking grandbabies? Whatever it is that you envision, be honest enough to admit it. You never know what will really transpire throughout your marriage, but every dream has to start somewhere. What you say when you propose marriage should definitely involve what you see as the picture perfect future for you!

Now you have covered the whys and the long-term outlook. The next detail to include is something special and unique between the two of you. This is what makes the moment extra special and completely personal. Do you have an inside joke? Tell her you want to marry her because she makes the best damn meatloaf in the world and you couldn’t imagine your life without it. The point here is to offer something that makes the moment fun and interesting. Up until this point, you can pretty much bet that your marriage proposal has been run of the mill. Think seriously about some of the simple things the two of you share, that may not be huge in the mountain of life – but are truly special between the two of you.

If you are proposing marriage, there are also a few things that you should not say. Don’t shed light on any of the problems that the two of you may be having. Don’t propose marriage as an effort to fix something seriously wrong in the relationship like infidelity. Refrain from saying things such as, “I know your parents hate me, but I want to marry you anyways,” which could cause your partner to have doubts or second thoughts.

Don’t propose marriage as a last ditch effort to save the relationship, or because of extenuating circumstances that exist – such as a pregnancy or illness. You also should avoid apologizing for the size (or lack there of) of an appropriate ring. Your marriage should be about much more than the size of a diamond, and by some stretches, it makes more sense to buy the really big, expensive jewelry when you have made it to the 10-year mark of beyond. These types of proposals will come back to bite you in the rear end for the rest of your life.

And of course, last but certainly not least in the list of what to say when you propose marriage is the obvious. You cannot propose marriage without saying I love you. Those three little words, can be the most powerful part of your message when you propose marriage. Your hope is that your partner will not only feel the same way – but also feel so strongly that they leap into your arms with a huge affirming YES!

What to say when you propose marriage, doesn’t have to be an exact science. Although, you should resist urges to just blurt it out, unless you have been spent some time carefully thinking about the past, present and future with the person that you love. Remember, by all intensive purposes this is the first moment of the rest of you life! Prepare it wisely.



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