Sometimes, a simple reboot resolves the issue, and the blue screen may not reappear. However, the BSOD often indicates a more serious problem that won’t disappear on its own. Fixing the Blue Screen of Death requires diagnosing the root cause to determine what’s wrong with your PC.

Diagnosing the Blue Screen of Death

The Blue Screen of Death appears when Windows encounters a critical issue from which it cannot recover. The operating system halts all operations and displays diagnostic information on the blue screen. In Windows XP, stop errors are numbered based on the circumstances causing the issue. Noting the error code when it appears is crucial, as it can aid in diagnosing the problem.

If a reboot doesn’t resolve the BSOD, you’ll need to perform further diagnostics. With potential causes ranging from software issues to hardware or driver problems, providing a universal set of instructions for every BSOD scenario is challenging. The first step is to identify the likely source of the issue.

If the BSOD occurs randomly, even in Safe Mode, it’s likely a hardware issue. If you recently installed new hardware, it could be the culprit. Try removing the new component to see if the problem persists. If no new hardware was added, further investigation is needed. If you’re not comfortable handling hardware components, consider consulting a technician.

If hardware issues are ruled out, boot your PC in Safe Mode and run a full system scan for viruses and spyware. If any threats are found, eliminate them and attempt to restart Windows XP in normal mode. If the scans detect nothing, boot into Safe Mode again and use the System Restore utility. In Safe Mode, you can access recent restore points created by the utility. Select the last known “good configuration” or, if a recent software installation is suspected, restore to a point before that installation.

If these steps don’t resolve the issue, further troubleshooting is required. If you recorded the blue screen error message, search online for additional advice or solutions specific to that error code. Many others have likely encountered the same issue, so online research may provide answers. Resolving a BSOD often requires patience, as it may involve significant trial and error.

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If you’ve ever experienced this, you know exactly what I mean. As you feel your seat leave your bike, the grip you once had on the handlebars slips away, and suddenly, you are airborne. As you plummet through the air, you can’t help but wonder how the idiot who just walked across your path has lived this long.

Each time this occurs, your landing spot varies. Today, you might crash into a ditch; tomorrow, you could end up with ripped jeans and bloody knees from being propelled into gravel. Worst of all is a collision with a sturdy oak tree—or even worse… a car. As you hurtle through the air, unsure of your final destination, you realize there’s a very good chance you’ll break bones, lose blood, or at the very least, destroy your bike.

The Smartphone Dilemma

This all-too-familiar scene unfolds due to some idiot’s unhealthy attachment to their smartphone. Instead of paying attention to anything outside the minute radius of their cell phone screen, the culprit is busy texting their friend and listening to some top 40 tune through expensive noise-canceling headphones. Having experienced this scenario many times, I firmly believe these “offenders” deliberately crank their tunes to ignore the frantic ringing of my bell and my screams as I slam into the concrete.

While it takes a great deal of restraint not to scream at those texting, watching videos, or checking emails as they stroll down the road, they are not the worst offenders when it comes to causing cyclists unnecessary grief. The coveted #1 position goes to those chasing Pokémon on their phones. These “special individuals” typically travel in packs, oblivious to anyone or anything around them. Their modus operandi is to bolt quickly to find and capture the next special creature they’ve been hunting for weeks. Because of these individuals, you go through far more brake pads than you should, and they deserve credit for the spikes in your blood pressure. You might even want to send them the bill for the anger management sessions you now require due to their “participation” in your “relaxing” hobby.

However, the worst part after a crash is when you finally “vent” at the party responsible for your misfortune, and they look at you as if to say, “What’s your problem? You need to watch where you’re going!”

This puts you in the frame of mind to escalate the dialogue, perhaps with an exclamation like, “Oh, REALLY! I need to watch where I’m going???”

At this point, you might think the city should invest in a little “natural selection” by randomly removing manhole covers along bike routes to weed out the strong from the weak. After all, Mother Nature is no dummy. Her system favors the strong to keep the gene pool vibrant. Unfortunately, there is no such process applicable to smartphone users today, leaving our civilization in a perpetual state of peril.

What makes smartphone users think they are above the rules of common sense and logic simply because they’re holding an internet-powered device in their hands?

Many may view this article as self-indulgent venting, and they have every right to do so. The bleeding hearts among us might feel it is unkind to criticize others’ rights to use their personal belongings. But the bottom line is that they pose a danger to public safety. After falling victim to their selfish antics numerous times, it’s hard not to think nasty thoughts when you see another smartphone-absorbed pedestrian heading your way.

Perhaps I should be thankful to these smartphone warriors who regularly cross my path with their heads down. After all, I now proudly bear a scar on my left knee from when I attempted to swerve to avoid a collision with a pedestrian on 4^th Avenue. It makes for a wonderful story to share at parties. I never tire of spending my hard-earned money on new cycling pants or replacing the perfectly good rim on my bike. If you think about it, they actually did me a favor since a lighter rim is much better anyway! Now I’m hoping the next pedestrian encounter will allow me to spend even more money on new wheels, enabling me to go faster and farther with minimal effort—an expenditure I wouldn’t have considered otherwise.

On second thought, if I replace the rim, I’ll just crash harder next time, giving me the opportunity to spill even more blood on the streets of my beloved city—perhaps becoming a hazard for some cell-phone-bound dimwit with their head firmly down, playing Pikachu. What a shame that would be.

Perhaps the best solution, one that would also eliminate the need to vent, is to mount a water cannon on my bike and carry a large bag of water on my back so I can douse encroaching, non-observant pedestrians. After all, isn’t education key to solving most problems? Not only would this wake up those in deep cyberland slumber, but the force of the water might also break their phones, preventing injury to both me and the user. Implement this winning strategy, and we could call off the workday to randomly remove manhole covers citywide, saving the city expense and effort—a win-win. Yes, the broken phone might cause its owner heartbreak, perhaps leading to untold Pokémon and Pikachu deaths within hours… something I’d feel rather guilty about… for the afternoon.

Unfortunately, the cannon is not the perfect solution to this dilemma. In reality, it would slow me down, hurt my back, and possibly necessitate trips to the chiropractor. But I haven’t given up on finding the answer. I’m rather fond of the idea of using an industrial-sized air horn. Where is that phone number for BC Ferries or a naval destroyer? Surely, they’ll have something that would do the trick…

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Texting, sharing, trolling, scrolling, you name it—teens who are sometimes dubbed the iGen or screenagers—are professionals in the social media spheres. It’s gotten easier to be cruel with the protection of a screen, and it’s gotten harder to differentiate reality from the highlight reel of a teen’s social profile. Spending hours perfecting their social identities, the pressures of social media can be overwhelming for teens and is leading to serious health issues like eating disorders, anxiety disorders, and depression. Striving for the “most likes” leave teens feeling like social media defines their self-worth.

Is Social Media Really That Impactful?

In short, yes, especially on teens. Research shows that 8 to 18 year olds are engaged with some form of media about 7.5 hours each day. That’s more time than the average school day! Pair that with the removed and somewhat anonymous nature of social media interactions and you have the perfect peer pressure storm.

Why Body Image Matters

Body image isn’t just a matter of vanity, a negative body image can have a significant impact on a teen’s mental and physical health. With relentless social media feeds of “perfect” celebrities and peers, it can be hard not to draw comparisons.  Even though everyone knows these images have been highly edited, an emotional response of “not good enough” can be difficult to avoid. Recent studies show that 1 out of 4 teens report feeling stressed about how they look in posted photos and feel bad about themselves if their posts are ignored.

While some companies are trying to help combat this—like Instagram’s new “kindness camera effect,” which encourages kind comments and filters—the best course of action as a parent or supportive adult comes from establishing a strong relationship with your teen.

Here are 3 ways you can help support a positive body image and boost self-esteem in your teen:

1. Exhibit respect. Talking about something teens feel they know more about than you can be difficult, so make sure to embrace this reality. Instead of starting a conversation by telling them what to do, try an approach like this: “You’re right, I didn’t grow up with social media. You have had to figure out a way to manage everything coming at you.” This will help start a conversation with them, instead of it feeling like a lecture at
2. Encourage positivity. You can’t possibly filter what your teen is exposed to on social media, but you can be a positive force in their life. In fact, research shows that having a trusted adult that teens feel comfortable turning to is the single most important factor in supporting healthy behaviors and higher self-esteem. Challenging your teen to post their own positive messages—like joining in on a trend like #MondayMotivation. The more their accounts are filled with positivity, the more they can help stop the cycle of negativity.
3. Ask, then Listen. Above all, the most important thing you can do to help your teen is to ask about their social media channels or posts, then listen when they share what they are thinking or feeling. Following your teen’s response to the example statement in #2 above, you may ask “What are some ways you can manage your social media to decrease your feelings of stress?” Actively listen and offer other suggestions (if needed). Knowing that you are really listening to what they are saying, even if you sometimes disagree, helps to build a strong, trusting relationship with your teen.

Despite our best efforts it’s impossible to control everything teens do or see on social media, or in the real world for that matter! But with these simple steps you can provide positive reinforcement and ensure they have a safe, supportive space waiting for them at home.

Dr. Jennifer Salerno is a nurse practitioner, researcher, author, national speaker, and founder of Possibilities for Change. Her team developed the nation’s leading adolescent risk screening system, RAAPS. Dr. Salerno’s book, Teen Speak, and the Teen Speak series includes practical communication strategies that have helped thousands of parents overcome the most common challenges of parenting a teen. (view website)

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What is a selfie?
The term “selfie” has only recently entered our vocabulary. Before the advent of the cell phone, we didn’t see such a phenomenon. Today, selfies are everywhere and have even inspired the invention of a self-proclaimed “selfie stick” to help photographers get the perfect shot of themselves.

But just what is a selfie?

A selfie is essentially a picture that someone takes of themselves using a phone or webcam with the intent of posting it on various social media platforms. Most selfies are taken by activating the front-facing camera on a smartphone, but some brave souls attempt to take selfies the old-fashioned way, with mixed results.

Why do people post selfies?

We live in a very self-centered, narcissistic era, and it can be easy to dismiss the selfie phenomenon as part of that. While there are surely some people who post daily selfies simply because they enjoy looking at themselves, they are typically the exception rather than the rule.

Here are some reasons why people might post frequent selfies:

As a means of self-expression
For some people, a selfie is simply a way to express different aspects of their personality. They enjoy documenting what they’re doing, and often, others appreciate being allowed to go along for the ride.
Selfies are especially appealing to people who enjoy “dressing up” or who love makeup or food. Why not take a photo of yourself beside your latest cupcake creation? Put together a smashing ensemble today? Why not document the “look” for the world to see?

Selfies can also serve as a way for people to remember particularly great occasions or things they’re truly proud of. What better way to create a memory than by posting a great photo? It’s a living record to celebrate someone’s uniqueness and can be viewed again and again as a reminder of wonderful times.

To get attention
The obvious assumption is that people who post repetitive selfies are looking for attention, and this can often be true. Social media lends itself well to addictive personalities who begin to feel driven to achieve more and more “likes” on their posts as a means to feel valued and appreciated.
At times, some people post many selfies daily with the intent of gaining the attention—and hopefully the affections—of one person in particular. Sadly, this can often backfire as many people tire quickly of being bombarded by constant images of the same person throughout the day. Instead of garnering more attention and interest, they can end up becoming “unfollowed” or even “unfriended,” which means not only less attention, but actual apathy, or even pity and frustration, from the intended selfie viewers.

For something to do
For someone who is simply bored and looking for something to pass the time, taking a selfie can be just what the doctor ordered. Achieving the perfect selfie photo can be akin to an art form. Lighting makes a difference, as does location, clothing, props, and makeup. Making a project out of creating the ideal postable image can help the selfie photographer learn new skills in a way that can be advantageous to them—and even to others. Done in moderation, it is a harmless way to pass the time.

To keep their social media profiles active

With the algorithms of social media newsfeeds prioritizing profiles that are most active, this provides great incentive for people to take and post selfies. After all, the more someone posts, the more they are seen. Many people enjoy having a profile that is seen as a place where things happen. Frequent selfies can help them achieve this goal.

To build self-esteem
Sadly, some people suffer from very low self-esteem and turn to the internet to gain the approval they desperately seek. Unfortunately, these individuals are often far less discriminating in who they add as friends or invite to become their friends. When selfie-takers lack feelings of self-worth, they become easy targets for predators. Their selfies can become increasingly provocative, attracting the wrong kind of attention. This is particularly dangerous when seen in teenagers, who may lack the ability to discern between people whose motives are far from pure.
In today’s society, we also see an alarming trend where people fail to be as honest as they should be. Children today live in a world where they are often not held accountable for their actions. It’s an “everyone gets a trophy” type of environment. Unfortunately, the world doesn’t operate according to these rules. Shielding children from the truth backfires, causing even greater harm when it’s revealed later, contradicting what the person has always believed about themselves. The selfie phenomenon plays into this societal epidemic by driving people to determine their worth based on the opinions of strangers who have far less than their best interests at heart.

The Dangers of Selfies

While selfies can be harmless fun, they can also lead to all sorts of trouble. Teenagers should be well-supervised by their parents to prevent them from toxic and harmful online relationships. But it’s not just children who are at risk—adults are also often targeted, particularly if they are vulnerable and seeking love and attention.

Here are some dangers selfies can cause if proper precautions are not taken:

Eating disorders
While we know that the internet has equipped people with various tools to enhance photos, we still tend to compare ourselves against what is out there. This becomes even more dangerous for young, impressionable minds who are prone to take everything at face value. They look at photos of other teenage girls and celebrities and start to categorize all their perceived faults until they become firmly convinced they fall short and are unworthy of love. This can lead to eating disorders, body image dissatisfaction, and devastatingly low self-esteem.

Loss of “in-person” relationships
With the advent of cell phones, it’s become easier for people to live their lives “online.” Many social media users begin to interact exclusively with their cyber friends, cutting out family and true friends in the process. Sadly, these online friends may be people they’ve never even met in person, yet they hold tremendous power over the person’s emotional well-being.

Online bullying
Social media has empowered a new type of bully. Capable of hiding behind a computer screen, some social media users lack the manners to use their words to build others up, instead using these tools to tear them apart. Cyberbullying has become an epidemic and has played a role in many cases of depression and even suicide in recent years.
Your selfie pictures drive me nuts! If you’ve ever said it—or even thought it—you are not alone! While posting selfies can be a completely harmless activity, it’s important to maintain proper boundaries. As with many things in life, moderation is key. If someone else’s constant selfie posting has you feeling a little crazy, a simple 30-day snooze might be just what the doctor ordered.

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• They need to stay in close touch with their parents in case they need help.
• Many kids take public transportation, so parents want their kids to call them if they don’t make it to school or get home in time.
• It goes beyond peer pressure. You don’t want your child to feel deprived because the other kids they hang out with have phones. Years ago, a smartphone was a luxury for a young child, but today it’s commonplace. Kids use phones to interact with friends and family, find out what people are saying about the latest film, or learn how to “GPS” their way to a destination.
• Phones can connect kids who are coping with loneliness or social isolation, linking them to others who feel the same way.

However, it’s a double-edged sword. On one hand, phones provide protection for kids, especially if they stray off course. On the other hand, easy access to social media makes it simple for predators to find their next victim.

The news is filled with stories of kids being cyber-bullied or preyed upon by people who exploit their vulnerability. This reality triggers a “protect my child” instinct in parents, especially when they hear stories from friends about their own kids almost becoming victims. Suddenly, parents feel that their top priority is to know exactly what their kids are up to, who they interact with, and what kinds of texts and messages they post online. Kids often disregard caution when it comes to social media connections.

This need to monitor kids has led social media entrepreneurs to scramble for parental control software and related apps specifically designed for this purpose.

An interesting point: The increased demand for parents and teachers to monitor the devices of pre-teens and teens has resulted in a massive market, predicted to grow to US$ 9.5 billion by the end of 2023 (Market Research Future, December 2017). The competition among providers of monitoring tools is fierce. The BBC reports that almost 80% of American kids own smartphones. Given their easy access to the Internet and social media, parents are concerned. However, monitoring kids’ phones has also created friction in the parent-child relationship.

Kids, Parents, and Phones: How Far Should We Take It?

Should parents spy on their kids’ phones?

“Spy” is too harsh a word. “Monitor” is more appropriate. “Spying” suggests negative activity and provokes strong reactions from kids who see it as interference and an invasion of their personal privacy.

The BBC summed it up well: “The trouble is, this particular subject isn’t covered in the parental playbook; that chapter hasn’t been written yet, and society hasn’t had time to form standards. We have a drinking age and a driving age, but there’s no solid conventional wisdom about at what age kids can safely go online solo or text a friend on their cell phone — or about what our role as parents should be in keeping tabs on our tykes.”

This entire discussion is based on the fact that we, as parents, love our kids and need to protect them. That’s our principal responsibility. There’s just too much sleaze online, not to mention toxic dialogues, bullying, and intimidation, which can irreparably damage healthy relationships.

Kids may not appreciate being monitored, but if you explain your reasons and raise their awareness about potential dangers, they might agree to periodic monitoring or practice more restraint about what they text and post.

Some kids will protest vigorously, using words like “lack of trust,” “abuse of parental controls,” and “killing my freedom.” Be firm. The need to monitor our kids’ phones is our duty. It is mandatory.

There are ways to go about it. Companies that design parental control software and apps encourage parents to tell their kids that their phones and computers are being monitored. This way, you don’t surprise them. It also reassures them that despite your busy schedule, ensuring their safety is your #1 priority.

As a parent, you can:

1. Start a conversation with real-life stories – When you alert your kids to potential dangers, don’t just say, “There are people out there with malicious intentions.” Awareness is key. Use concrete examples of crimes that people are capable of committing.

For example, the US Homeland Security Unit reported a case where a stranger took a snapshot of an 11-year-old girl who was in a family car. It seemed harmless, but the girl’s photo was later posted on a website visited by pedophiles who discussed how to rape her and get away with it. https://www.dhs.gov/cyber-crime-cases

Another story: 14-year-old Jade Stringer was bullied by numerous people because of her good looks and popularity. Unable to handle the pressure, she took her own life. See story #4 in https://www.oddee.com/item_98356.aspx

Engage in a positive conversation. Ask casually about what websites they visited that day, and who they were chatting with, then verify what they say. There are apps for that — Google them and select the one most appropriate for you.

2. Learn the lingo and acronyms – You’re familiar with LOL (laugh out loud) or JK (just kidding), but did you know about LMIRL (let’s meet in real life), NIFOC (naked in front of computer), or PIR (parent in room)? Awareness is key!
3. Do random, not scheduled checks – Tell your kids that you’ll decide when to monitor their phones, without specifying times. You pay for their phone and service, so you are the rightful owner. As the rightful owner, you can check their phones whenever you choose.
4. Encourage extracurricular or athletic activities – Our parents and grandparents didn’t have cell phones. They entertained themselves by playing outside, learning a musical instrument, reading a book, swimming, or hiking. Today’s kids lead sedentary lifestyles (you’ve heard of young kids suffering from diabetes or high cholesterol) because the only exercise they get is using their thumbs! Engaging in extracurricular activities can help them spend less time on their cell phones.
5. Keep emphasizing old-fashioned values like respect and honesty – Tell your kids that a little respect goes a long way. If they get into a fight, they shouldn’t post photos online calling Helen a bitch or labeling John a loser. No one deserves to be maliciously shamed in public. Teach them to keep their anger and resentments private.
6. Insist on self-restraint when posting personal information – We don’t need to remind you about the safety of your kids and your family. No phone numbers, addresses, email addresses, or banking/credit card information should be posted online. These bits of information are not for public consumption. Wealthy families have run into trouble because their kids openly discuss their rich lifestyles on sites like Instagram.

Conclusion: Yes, you must monitor your child’s cell phone and computer activity. Be honest with them, tell them you worry about their safety, and that checking their social media activity is the only way to ensure that they’re safe. Focus on positive monitoring, raising their awareness daily!

As Danny Mekić said, “People feel uncomfortable when they have to divulge personal information during a police interrogation. Isn’t it strange that one-sixth of the world population spreads such information on social media?”

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John: Stacey asked me for my Facebook password. I’ll give it to her when I get home tonight.

Kyle: Are you serious? You’re opening a can of worms.

John: Oh c’mon. Can of worms…aren’t you being too dramatic?

Kyle: Dramatic, no. Cautious, yes. Besides, John, I know you too well. I look at your Facebook page and you’ve got hundreds of friends, and there are messages from some women that make me flinch. I know you’re not being unfaithful, but you’re great at flirting. The women are taken in by your charms, online and offline.

John: Nothing to worry about. I’m not doing anything to wreck my marriage. Come on Kyle, aren’t you hallucinating, just a little?

Kyle: No, I’m not. If I were Stacey, your Facebook account would worry me and give me sleepless nights.

John: Stacey’s an intelligent woman, she never plays detective. She minds her own business.

Kyle: So why is she asking for your password?

John couldn’t answer. Maybe Kyle had a point. He’s had his Facebook page for four years now and she never asked for his password. Why is she asking for it now? Is there something she’s looking for? Has anyone told her anything?

Reviewing Facebook’s Policy

We’ll discuss the pros and cons of sharing your social media passwords with your significant other, but first, let’s set the stage by reviewing Facebook’s policy regarding privacy. Many of us sign up in social media sites without reading the terms and conditions of membership. (https://www.facebook.com/legal/terms)

If you read Facebook’s policy, the rules are clear and precise.

Under “Safety”, rule # 5 states:

You will not solicit login information or access an account belonging to someone else.

And then on the same page, under “Registration and Account Security” rule # 8 states:

You will not share your password (or in the case of developers, your secret key), let anyone else access your account, or do anything else that might jeopardise the security of your account.

There you are.  You can’t share passwords. Period.

The idea of sharing passwords, however, is an interesting discussion. We’ve witnessed how it wrecks friendships (hit “unfriend”) and spikes the divorce rate. While there is no conclusive evidence that social media activity is linked to divorce rates, there have been studies that point to a correlation, direct or not.

An article in Focus on the Family reports: “A recent survey of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers revealed that Facebook has been a major factor in one out of five U. S. divorces. So it’s wise to take precautions.”

In another article, CNBC says: “…social media’s addictive qualities may create marital strife, promote an environment rife with opportunities for jealousy and may help facilitate extra-marital affairs.”

There are pros and cons of sharing passwords, but we think the cons outweigh the pros. Call us biased, but the reality is that social media have opened the floodgates to the excessive sharing of personal information.

This is why we must cling to – and protect – the remaining fibers of our personal life. We don’t have to be open books…we don’t have to share our social media accounts with our significant other.

Pros and Cons of Sharing Social Media Passwords

1. Pro: Trust and Honesty – your significant other feels good about the fact that you have nothing to hide. If you use your account sparingly and you don’t have an entire universe of friends, then this trust and honesty argument is sustainable. By sharing your password, you’re saying “what’s mine is yours” and you live happily ever after.

Con: Just as promises are made to be broken, relationships can turn sour. Sometimes, the relationship ends precisely because of too much social media activity. And sharing your password with your significant other is not a sure sign of trust and honesty. Remember, there are numerous social media and people have multiple social media accounts. Do they share their passwords to all of these accounts?

2. Pro: Convenience – knowing your significant other’s passwords can be a convenient arrangement. For example, if your in-laws post a reminder that the next golf tournament is next week and you forgot about it, you simply ask your significant other to RSVP. Another example: you and your better half had dinner at a fabulous restaurant. Instead of doing a double review, you ask your significant other to do it so your friends can check it out.

Con: While the examples above point to the convenience of shared passwords, it may not be a good idea to let your significant other post comments about how you feel at work. It would be inappropriate for your significant other to tweet, “my boyfriend thought his salary and performance review sucked.”

Or if you read a comment like “my boyfriend failed a breathalizer test the other day.”  This may seem like an innocent remark, but may be less innocent to office workers and to management. Convenience, therefore, can result in inappropriate comments being posted. Discretion is your priority, but your significant other may not think it is a priority.

3. Pro: Romantic and affectionate – oh, sure, sharing your social media account is an extension of your romantic self. You ever notice how new relationships foster sincere and candid conversations between two people in love?

Con: When the honeymoon’s over and the relationship becomes routine, what happens, especially when you begin to discover personality quirks in your significant other and you tweet about them?

As one writer so aptly put it, “There is something pure and romantic about the idea of sharing everything, and having no secrets from one another. But it’s romantic the same way that Romeo and Juliet is romantic, in a tragic, horrible, everyone-is-miserable-and-dies-at-the-end kind of way.”

4. Pro: Accountability. This means that because you know your boyfriend (or girlfriend) has access to your account, you’re more likely to be prudent. You think twice before posting a comment that may be misconstrued or misinterpreted by your significant other.

Con: “Digital entanglements” as one writer calls them, create risks. If a relationship turns sour, or a marriage ends in divorce court, password-sharing is easily viewed as a possible cause. It no longer is an issue between two people, because other people are potentially dragged into a messy situation. For example, if a colleague at work saw your significant other with another person in a highly inappropriate setting and then emails you about it, he does not know that your wife has access to your account. So the wife finds out that someone spilled the beans and can press defamation charges.

5. Exclusivity: By sharing passwords, couples let the word out that they are married. There is an implied “no trespassing” message. This keeps the flirts and stalkers at bay.

Con: The bold and the brazen believe it is an open playing field, and one’s marital status has nothing to do with the game of seduction. Even if your significant other tells you that your admirer’s emails are harmless and definitely unsolicited, would that put you at ease?

To conclude, tell us how many of your fights were a result of comments posted on social media because you’ve shared passwords?

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Today, the world for children and teens is vastly different, almost unrecognizable. The internet and smartphones have transformed communication, creating the illusion of greater connectivity. Yet, many parents worry that the ways their kids use the internet could lead them into risky situations. It’s not uncommon for teens to stay glued to their phones, even during family dinners, further complicating efforts to stay connected in meaningful ways.

As parents, we want our children to grow into responsible, aware, and compassionate adults, which requires an element of trust. However, monitoring your child’s digital activity is essential, even if it feels like an invasion of privacy or sparks some resistance. Monitoring your child’s activity in the digital world is a necessary step, and here’s how to approach it effectively.

Establishing Clear Guidelines

The first step is to hold a sit-down meeting with your kids. Be transparent about the internet’s benefits and risks, explaining that while it’s a powerful tool, it can also be a place where people misrepresent themselves. Clearly outline the rules, including your right, as a parent, to track their smartphone and monitor their online activity. This may involve requiring them to share usernames and passwords.

Be prepared for resistance—this conversation may not be easy. Stay firm but fair, and clearly explain the consequences of breaking the rules, such as losing phone privileges. Setting expectations upfront fosters mutual understanding and accountability.

Tools for Monitoring Digital Devices

In the interest of mutual respect, it’s best to inform your child before installing tracking apps on their phone. However, if discretion is necessary, numerous apps are available to track smartphones at varying levels of detail. Basic apps use the phone’s GPS to show its location, allowing you to verify if your teen is where they claim to be. More advanced apps provide access to contacts, call logs, visited websites, and text messages. If something seems off, such as an unfamiliar number in their call history, a reverse phone lookup service can help identify who your child is communicating with.

For laptops and home computers, most modern operating systems include built-in parental controls. These allow you to set up restricted user accounts for your child, limiting access to certain websites. This is particularly effective for younger children or shared computers. Place computers in high-traffic areas of the home to discourage visits to inappropriate sites. Additional software can record all computer activity or allow real-time monitoring from another device. While these measures may feel intrusive, they are effective for ensuring safety, especially if there have been past issues.

Monitoring devices outside the home, such as library computers or a friend’s laptop, is more challenging. However, with access to usernames and passwords, you can still check social media accounts and email for suspicious activity.

The internet poses real dangers for children, from cyberbullying to online predators. While granting some privacy is a key part of parenting, ensuring your child’s safety is the top priority. By setting clear rules and using monitoring tools thoughtfully, you can strike a balance between trust and protection.

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As parents of teenagers, there might be days when we wish we could tap into a sleuthing mastermind to keep tabs on our teen’s technology use. We hear the horror stories about cyberbullying, sexting, online predators, and more which can be disheartening or stress inducing. Somewhere along the way, we find ourselves monitoring a teens’ technology use while worrying about hidden apps, sexting images, and online reputations.

It would be great to channel Sherlock Holmes or Watson, but we are left to our own devices. In the fast paced world of Social Media it can be difficult to stay on top of a teen’s technology use, but it isn’t impossible or something only a gumshoe can accomplish. Parents don’t need a well written screenplay to actively monitor a teen’s technology use.

Pros And Cons Of Monitoring A Teen’s Technology

Monitoring is often viewed negatively, because people feel it is spying or something done behind the child’s back. They worry monitoring negatively affects the relationship between teens and parents by increasing anxiety and low self-confidence in children. A few parents even worry monitoring sends the message parents lack trust in their child and tends to promote hovering. To top it all off, many experts feel teens need to learn from their mistakes to mature into adults- a process hindered by monitoring a teen’s technology use.

However, monitoring a teen’s technology use can be beneficial if it is done properly. These measures allow parents to identify potential problems and prevent heartbreaking outcomes. Being aware of a child’s technology use can alert parents to cyberbullying or keep children from dicey situations like riding with drunk drivers or meeting strangers they connected with online.

A child’s safety is priceless and often outweighs any potential side effects. Monitoring can also prevent legal issues for parents. Now 20 states hold parents accountable for a child’s online misdemeanors. There are documented court cases where parents are prosecuted for failing to monitor and stop aggressive online behaviors.

Tips For Successful Monitoring

Teens don’t generally approve of parent involvement in their online affairs, but here are a few strategies to stay updated on a child’s technology use:

Be straightforward. Tell your teen you will be checking in on their devices and Internet activity from time to time, stressing that it is a safety measure. Honesty prevents spying and sneaking behind a child’s back.

Compile their usernames, passwords, and account information in one place. This practice has two benefits: easy access to forgotten passwords and allows parents access to accounts if problems arise.

Know a parents rights. Parents do have legal rights to monitor a teen’s cell phone if you pay the bill and the child is under 18.

Keep all electronics in common areas like the living room. Allowing children to use their devices where you can see them allows you to notice problems before they spiral out of control.

Check all electronics in at one convenient location. Create a charging station by the front door to deposit devices to make morning routines and locating charge cords easier. Plus you will be able to limit use at home.

Guide your child in the art of Social Media etiquette. Start young and discuss the rules of the Internet. We wouldn’t let them ride their bikes in the street without a safety talk- the same should apply to the Internet.

Model appropriate use with devices. If we tell them not to text and drive, but do so ourselves- what message are we sending our children? Avoid being a hypocrite and practice what we preach.

Limit data plans. A recent study found that the greatest way to reduce sexting habits was to limit the amount of data in a teen’s plan- even when compared to parents checking messages.

Invest in an app that allows access to a child’s Internet and Smartphone activity. Look for an app that is easy to install, uses a dashboard to organize all accounts in one location, and doesn’t interfere with your teen’s programs.

Foster an ongoing dialogue with your teen. Open dialogue, without judgment or lectures, will allow parents to gain a better understanding of the situations your teen is facing.

Have a plan. As your child ages, their needs for privacy will grow. Keep tabs on how they handle Social Media and slowly scale back your monitoring if a teen displays maturity and sound judgment.

Piecing Together Technology For Better Tomorrows

By being involved in a teen’s technology use, and with a little luck, parents can piece together a solution to solve the mystery of raising children in a digital age.

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The sad truth is that, on some level, cell phones at the dinner table are likely just as dangerous as they are when used while driving. In a twisted turn of events, technology meant to keep people connected has actually been counterproductive and often keeps families apart rather than together. If the family connection gets lost among Facebook, and if parents forget how to speak to their children and instead text them, what kind of world will we have left?

The Disconnected Family: A Modern Dilemma

Parents complain all the time that life has become so fast-paced they don’t get enough time with their children. Yet, the fragile moments they do spend together—whether in car pools or eating at a restaurant—are spent communicating with other people. While it’s nothing new for pre-teens and teens to want to connect with their friends instead of their parents, the age of “disconnect” is getting younger than ever. A recent technology poll stated that around half of all children aged 9 already have cell phones—and Facebook accounts, despite the fact that you’re supposed to be 13 to set up an account. With all of these social connections synced into a cell phone, the phone becomes an escape for children, allowing them to leave their families even when they are physically together.

Gone are the days of making the kids sit in the back of a minivan, listening to old renditions of Grease or Barry Manilow records. Now, kids sit happily tuned into their iPods, cell phones, or other media devices with headphones, so they don’t disturb one another. Instead of sharing to bridge the generational gap and putting the kids through ‘embarrassing’ and outdated methods of being together, we’re separating. Also gone are the days of the family dinner, where family members would gather around a table for a meal and engage in real conversations.

Even worse is that it’s not just kids to blame. Parents, too, are so connected to emails that they literally jump out of their skin to answer a ringing cell phone or Blackberry. They, too, sit at the dinner table, in car pools, or in restaurants, completely connected to everyone else except the people they’re physically with. Important conversations are put on hold because adults have forgotten that it’s rude to answer the phone during dinner or while in conversation. But they can’t help themselves, and so they lead by example—teaching their children to do the same.

Interesting studies have shown that toddlers often feel threatened by the perceived threat of mom and dad’s computer or cell phone. Perhaps that’s why so many children end up in toilets, with frustrated three-year-olds trying to quickly outdo the new brand of sibling rivalry. Think about it—could this theory really be that far-fetched?

Years ago, dinnertime was sacred. You didn’t visit other families, friends, or neighbors during dinnertime. Remember the busy single parent? That meant the family was eating dinner together. As a family. The television was turned off, and the conversations—although often boring, tedious, and even unbearable (especially for teens)—were a sacred family event. Today, fewer than half of all families eat together three times a week. And when they do, the rules of yesterday, based on simple etiquette and manners, seem to have been banished.

Maybe, just maybe, it would be worthwhile to return to the days of Leave It to Beaver and enforce a rule in your home that says cell phones are not welcome at the dinner table. Perhaps turning off the cell phones, computers, and personal devices—those things that disconnect us from the ones we love the most—could be the first step in reasserting the importance of family. This could help ensure that our children don’t forget the value of family time. While it may not be the 1950s anymore, statistics seem to indicate that older generations might still have a lot to teach us about family values and love.

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Such as these…

“My kid is on the honor roll!”
“My child placed 1st in their softball tournament.”
“I have been married 16 years today to the man/woman of my dreams.”
“I finally got that raise I’ve been wanting for ten years.”
“My daughter was the town beauty queen (with a picture, of course).
“Look at this beautiful Tiffany ring my husband bought me.”
The list is endless.

In a world where it was once considered rude, or bad manners, to boast and brag, Facebook has enabled us to break all the rules. In fact, Facebook has become the go-to online diary, where we can share everything and anything about ourselves and our family in the hopes that our 500+ closest friends, family, and acquaintances will stroke our ego by hitting the like button or making a nice (though often fake) comment.

The Reality Behind the Facebook Show

The reality, as we all know, is this: when we see posts about the amazing feats and successes of our Facebook posse, we often think they’re either lying or full of it. When we see that completely (and obviously) photoshopped picture of our friend, who in real life looks like a sunken ship, sparkling like a beauty queen, we think, “What a pathetic way to try and draw attention.” When we see posts about how awesome people’s kids, spouses, neighbors, or pets are, we hit the like button while secretly wanting to type a sarcastic comment about how ridiculous it looks for adults to be trolling for attention on Facebook.

It’s one thing for a teenage boy or girl to do this, but it’s altogether different when adults are seeking affirmation that the world loves them and that they’re winners.

And sadly, we are all guilty of it. Not only are we guilty of posting the self-affirming boasts and brags about how much weight we lost, how much exercise we did at the gym, how much sex we had the night before, how awesome we are at cooking or dancing, and how incredibly talented and beautiful our kids are – but we are also guilty of playing along and playing nice by hitting the “like” button and making insincere comments about how proud we are of our friends.

It’s a bit ridiculous. And it’s so obvious what we’re doing – trying to fluff up our own lives and egos, and make ourselves look better than we are by engaging our friends in our ongoing awesomeness.

Even worse than trolling for love and attention on Facebook are those people who constantly post their whines, troubles, and prayer requests. What part of our human psyche does it serve to constantly whine, gripe, complain, and cry on Facebook? Does the world really need to know that your 6th relationship in the past year has failed? Does the world need to hear that you’ve had explosive diarrhea and haven’t been able to leave the house for a week? Does the world need a minute-by-minute update on the state of your sick father? And do YOU really need the world to constantly console and coddle you as if you’re a colicky infant?

These posters appear weak and incapable of handling their own problems. They are negative and drain the Facebook feed, which should be filled with humor and socialization, not sappy stories, gripes, and boasts.

What Is This World Coming To?

Most of us remember as children when our parents told us, “Now, honey, don’t brag!” You remember when you got the best bike in the neighborhood, the one with reflectors on the spokes that allowed you to ride around after dark, and you wanted to show it off to every friend you had. And your mom would say, “Now, honey, it’s not nice to show off!” You remember when your parents would tell you, “There are some things you don’t talk about in public”? They would warn you that family problems were family problems, and they should remain just that. They’d say, “Now dear, let’s not air our dirty laundry for the world to see!”

All that advice has been thrown out the metaphoric window. Today, we have Facebook. Now, we can all be the biggest crybabies on the block and brag the loudest without incident. In fact, with Facebook, we can do these things and receive positive (though often phony) attention and pats on the back, and even love from complete strangers.

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