So why don’t more people eat poached eggs, and why do restaurant cooks make faces when you order poached eggs? Are they that difficult to prepare correctly? Not at all, but there are a few tricks to it, which will be the ultimate subject of this article. By the time you finish, you should be able to poach like a pro, with no fuss at all.

A Little Egg History…

If you want to really be good at poaching eggs, or cooking them in any manner, you need to understand eggs. We’ve been eating eggs since before we were completely human, as far back as 3 million years! As Hunter-Gatherers, eggs were a logical food choice because they taste great, are easy and quick to cook, and most importantly, they didn’t fight back or run away. This was somewhat important at a time when most animals were 4 or 5 times bigger than us, and at least 50% faster on foot, coupled with the fact that most of them also had large fangs, tusks, big spurs, huge hoofs, and really nasty dispositions. At first, we probably did a whole lot more gathering, than hunting, at least until we learned how to make spears.

We started robbing nests, and figured out which birds had the best tasting eggs, and were the least threatening (they had some really big birds back then…). We eventually decided on chickens. Then, someone got the great idea to just bring the whole chicken home to lay eggs, rather than go looking for them, and thus, livestock production was born. By around 7000 BC, they had egg production down pretty good, at least in China and India, which may be why today, they are some of the biggest consumers of eggs in the world. Egg production didn’t spread to Africa, West Asia, Egypt or the European Continent until around 800 BC. There is evidence that Native Americans domesticated chickens for eggs as far back as 1500 BC.

Eggs were consumed raw at first, but when we invented fire, eggs were roasted in the coals, After we figured out how to make pottery, boiled eggs became very popular, so much that in ancient Rome, there was a saying; “ab ova ad mala”, meaning, “From eggs to apples”. Eggs were a common appetizer and apples were a common desert, so this really meant something to the effect of From Start to Finish, or From the Beginning to the End. It wasn’t too long before people began pickling eggs to preserve them for long trips, frying them, baking them, and of course, poaching them.

Eggology 101

Eggs are a wonder of nature. They are, in effect, a self contained ecosystem for an embryo. The shell breaths and lets in moisture while keeping the contents in. Even its shape is practical. Ever wonder why an egg is oval? It is because if an egg gets loose, or bumped, it will roll in a circle, instead of out of the nest. Neat, huh? The yolk supplies food for the embryo, and the albumen, which is a complete, high-quality protein, cushions it and keeps it moist. Another part of the egg, the chalaza, which is a long white stringy thing on each end of the egg, keeps the yolk from banging against the shell and breaking if it gets bumped. If you ever get an egg with a small dark spot in the yolk, it is not a developing embryo. It is simply a blastoma, or a small piece of extra tissue that serves no purpose. You can eat it safely and it should not effect the taste, but if it bothers you, it can be removed with a fork before, or after cooking. And lastly, sometimes you may find a small air pocket in the albumen. It is perfectly normal and does not effect the egg at all.

Most of the egg, except the shell, is high-grade protein, with some vitamins and essential fatty acids. An average egg only has 76 calories, a meager 1.4 grams of saturated fat, only 5.1 grams of other fats, and a whopping 7.5 grams of the highest quality protein there is.

What about cholesterol?  Well, at one time they used to think that eating eggs contributed to high blood cholesterol, but recent studies have shown that there is little or no correlation between consuming edible cholesterol, and cholesterol in the blood. Saturated fats are now believed to be the culprit and the American Heart Association recommends that you eat no more than 16 grams of saturated fats per day. Good news… an egg only has 1.4 grams of saturated fat, and it is unlikely you would eat 10 or more eggs in a day. And the really great thing about poached eggs is that you do not cook them in any fat, so there is no extra saturated fat to worry about. You can instead worry about the bacon, ham, fried potatoes, etc… that usually accompany egg meals. Poached eggs do not require any of these side items.  They really go better with things like roasted cherry tomatoes, or any kind of tomato, for that matter, mild sauces, curries, rice and other grains…they really can stand on their own. One of my favorite poached egg dishes is Shashuka, which is just eggs poached in spicy tomatoes with onions and peppers…. Scrumptious.

Getting Down To Business of Poaching an Egg

Now you know enough about eggs to be able to successfully poach them. There are just a few things you should keep in mind before you start.

• You want to use the best eggs you can get. Chickens that are fed hormones, also known as laying feed, will have watery, pale yellow yolks and a thin albumen (which will be the egg white). Most store-bought eggs will be of this type. Organic eggs usually have a darker, yellow-orange color to the yolk and a thicker albumen. Cage-Free eggs will have a darker orange-yellow color, a nice thick albumen, and tons of flavor. The absolute best egg is one direct from a free-range, organic chicken, that has never been refrigerated.
• Farm eggs will look dirty, but they have a film on them that protects them from spoiling for around a month at room temperatures, so avoid washing them until you get ready to use them. All the dirt and whatever is on the outside shell only. You can keep them at room temperature until ready for use, and you won’t have to let them warm up before-hand. Store bought eggs are always washed, so they have to be refrigerated. If you are unsure of the freshness of your eggs, here is an old trick. Fill a deep bowl with cold water and place the eggs in it. Fresh eggs will sink to the bottom. Old eggs will float. Discard the old eggs, dry the good ones and put them up. Be advised that once you do this, your eggs will have to be washed and refrigerated, or used immediately.
• Eggs are mostly protein, which can be fragile on a molecular level. It’s why the body can use it so easily. Treat the eggs gently and do not agitate them more than is necessary. Breaking the amino chains can result in rubbery, strong flavored eggs. This is one of the most common mistakes cooks make when trying to cook eggs. It will also result in less loft, and less leavening, so if you break the amino chains, you can say goodbye to light, fluffy scrambled eggs.
• In almost all cases, eggs respond better to cooking when they are at room temperature. You can use them cold, but you will not get the best from your eggs that way. This is especially true when poaching.
• Never crack eggs directly into the water. Always crack them into a small bowl first, so you can inspect them before cooking. Also, it saves you from having to discard the water and start over should a yolk break coming out of the shell (and it does happen to everyone sometimes, mostly with store-bought eggs…). Once you are satisfied with the eggs, gently ease them into the hot water.
• You will have less chance of breaking the yolk if you crack the egg on a flat surface, rather than an angled one, like the edge of a counter, stove, or a butter knife. Angled pressure can force the shell into the egg, possibly breaking the yolk. It also can result in the shell flaking and falling into the egg, forcing you to dig the little pieces out, and maybe breaking the yolk in the process. There are some great YouTube videos on how to properly crack an egg. Watch them and practice a lot. Eggs are cheap and can be used in hundreds of different ways, so there really is no excuse not to practice.
• Never, never, never add any junk to the water to make the egg coagulate. Vinegar and citric acids will destroy the amino chains, and result in a rubbery, tasteless egg that may taste of vinegar….yuck!!!!!
• Some people swear by swirling the water before slipping the egg in, and others say not to disturb the water any more than necessary, or it will damage the aminos. Swirling causes the egg to fold in upon itself as it solidifies, making a tight-looking egg. Not swirling allows the egg to create strings and shapes as it does its thing, but these will tuck back in when the egg is removed from the water. I feel the egg has better flavor and texture if you don’t agitate any more than you have to, but it is your choice. It is a very subtle difference.
• A common mistake is to add eggs to simmering water. That is not poaching. It is simmering, and doesn’t taste anything like a properly poached egg. Remember, we want to avoid shaking the egg up as much as possible, and simmering/boiling water will cause the egg to bounce around and rattle the yolk. The proper temperature for poaching and egg is 180ᵒF to 190ºF. Water boils at 212ᵒF. What you want to do is to heat the water in your pot until you just start to see tiny, tiny bubbles start to form on the bottom. Then lower the heat a little, and slip in your eggs. The water will cool a little more when you add the eggs, especially if you use cold eggs.

Now, we are ready to cook. Get all of your items together before you start. You will need:

• A pan at least 2” deep. Deeper is better.
• A slotted spoon for removing the eggs once they are done.
• Plates, ready to go.
• Any extra things you want, like tomatoes, side-dishes, etc… Make sure they are prepared before you start the eggs, because eggs poach very quickly, and demand your full attention.
• A small bowl to crack the eggs in.
• Salt and pepper to taste.
• Any extras like hot sauce, Hollandaise, condiments, etc…

Get your eggs out of the fridge (unless they are already room temperature…), and allow them to warm. This can take up to 30 minutes.

Once the eggs are properly warmed, fill your pan 3/4 of the way with water. Set the pan on the stove and set the burner to High Heat.

Watch the water closely, and when you see small bubbles begin to form on the bottom of the pan, lower the heat to Medium High.

Crack your eggs gently into the bowl and inspect them. Once you are satisfied,  slip them gently into the water. Do not swirl the water. Do not add vinegar or citrus.

The eggs will curl, and act like lovesick amoebas for a few seconds. Don’t worry. It’s normal.  As a rule, 3 minutes will give you a creamy, delicate white with a slightly thickened, but still runny yolk. 4 minutes will give a firmer white, and an almost solid yolk. 5 minutes will give you a very firm, but still edible (so they say…) white, and a solid yolk. Any longer and all you will have is a coaster for your coffee cup…. I cook mine 2 minutes…. These times are for a single egg. For every extra egg, add 30 seconds to the times.

When the eggs are to your liking, turn off the burner and gently remove them from the water with a slotted spoon. Allow them to drain over the pot for a bit, or you can set them on a paper towel to dry the excess water. No one likes a bunch of messy used egg water on their plate…

Transfer the eggs to the plates, garnish and chow down….

Shashuka

This is so easy that I don’t think it even qualifies as a recipe. You only need 5 components:

Eggs

Tomatoes. You can use fresh, or canned. You can even use tomato sauce, for a different texture. The flavored canned diced tomatoes work really good in this, like the ones with peppers and onions already in it, chili-ready, Italian, etc… My favorite is Snappy Tom with Green Chilies.

Something for heat (if desired) like peppers, hot sauce, dried chilies, etc… I use Carolina Reaper Pepper Sauce, but it is not for the faint-hearted. You can leave this out if you don’t like hot stuff.

Something for spice, like onions, curry powder, garlic, cilantro, green peppers, etc…

A little top garnish for some flair, like parsley, cilantro, fresh basil, etc…

You can even add some meat, like bacon pieces, ham, sausage, canned sardines or mackerel, ground beef, etc….  I personally think it takes away from the eggs, but it’s your food. Make it like you want. Other than burning it, I really don’t think you can mess this up.

Procedure:

Start by placing a large skillet on the stove over Medium High heat. Depending on how done you want your eggs, you may want to have a lid handy. Allow the skillet to heat up a bit before proceeding, maybe 3 or 4 minutes. If a drop of water sizzles, it’s ready.

Add a tablespoon of oil to the skillet. I highly recommend good olive oil.

Add your chopped onions, chopped garlic, chopped peppers, or any other raw veggies, and sauté them until the onions are translucent, and celery (if any) is tender. Fresh jalapeño peppers are great to add at this stage…

Add the tomatoes, juice and all, stir,  and allow them to simmer for a bit.  You can add any hot sauces now, if you want. When everything is simmering nicely, proceed to the next stage.

Add any extra spices you want now, like salt and pepper, red pepper, garlic powder, curry powder, etc… Add them to your taste. Stir well and continue to simmer.

This is one of the few times I will say it is OK to crack eggs directly into your skillet. There is no other way to do this. With a spoon, make a well in the tomatoes for each egg. Now, crack each egg carefully into its well. If a yolk breaks, don’t worry. Just crack another egg on top of it. It will be fine…

It is very important at this stage that you do not stir, shake or disturb the eggs in any way, until they are done.

If you want well-done eggs with a solid yolk, place a lid on the skillet. Check the eggs often.

When the eggs are done to your liking, use a ladle, or large spoon to lift each egg and tomato well onto your plates. Extra tomato sauce that is left can be arranged around the eggs.

Garnish, add the extras, and chow down. Shashuka is traditionally served with an Indian Flatbread called roti, but I will tell you a secret…. Roti is pretty much just a flour tortilla, and regular flour tortillas can be substituted for it anytime. You won’t know the difference.

I hope you have enjoyed this article. Check back with us often for more great material.

Bon apetit.

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It has become somewhat trendy now to offer fried turkey during the holidays. And what’s not to like? The super crispy thin skin, or the moist, tender meat? When it’s done right, fried turkey is hard to beat.

But what about when things don’t go right? Reports come in every year about turkey frying disasters. Apparently, it is such a danger that the Department of Homeland Security has issued a warning this year on their Twitter feed about the dangers of frying turkeys. Who would’ve ever thought that a cooking method could become a matter of National Security? Is frying a turkey really that much more dangerous than other cooking methods? Let’s examine the issue…

According to the National Fire Prevention Association, each year, 5 people are killed, over 60 people injured, and over 900 homes are destroyed in incidents involving turkey fryers. Of course, all of these incidents are tragic, but in a country with a population of over 321 million, is that enough to constitute a threat to National Security? It seems a bit hysterical to me, but that’s just my opinion. By comparison, according to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, as of 2016, an average of 102 people die every day from car accidents, but no one seems to be afraid to continue driving. I haven’t heard anything from Homeland Security about that. And what about other home cooking methods? The same statistics for other cooking methods show that an average of 480 people die, over 4000 people will be injured, and over 700 million dollars of property will be damaged, all by cooking. These figures do not include restaurants, being cut by meat slicers and knives, slips and falls, or other common kitchen injuries. I really don’t understand why the focus seems to be all negative towards Turkey Fryers, but I seldom understand mainstream media anyway, so I’m not going to worry about it…

In reality, once all the hype and hysteria is weeded out, frying a turkey is no more dangerous than any other type of cooking, as long as the proper safety precautions and procedures are followed. There is no reason why you can’t enjoy a heaping helping of some delicious fried turkey this year. To this end, I am going to give you some tips to help you make your bird all that it can be.

Why Deep Fry a Turkey?

Frying turkey began as part of the Cajun Cooking craze in the 1970s. Large outdoor propane cookers were used in Louisiana to boil crawfish in massive quantities for huge get-togethers. Someone figured out that you could replace the water with oil, and fry whole turkeys with the same equipment, starting a national trend. It becomes more popular every year. But why?

Most people would agree that fried foods are incredible. A thin, potato chip-like crust with moist, tender and very flavorful meat is an almost irresistible treat. Turkeys are no exception. A properly fried turkey will have an incredible thin, crispy crust, and the meat will remain moist, with all of its flavor intact. The reason is because the hot oil immediately sears the outside of the bird, holding all of the juices and fats inside, so nothing is lost. The turkey cooks much faster (usually less than 1 hour), so there is less danger of the meat getting dry. Think of the difference between baked and fried chicken. Both are great, but most of the time, which do you prefer? Col. Sanders did not create his culinary empire with roasted chicken….

Of course, like anything else, there are also a few downsides to the issue. Many aficionados will try to tell you that frying a turkey is much quicker than roasting one, but this is only true if you don’t count the prep time, time to heat up the oil, clean-up time, and the task of storing and/or disposing of several gallons of used cooking oil. You are also limited as to the size of the bird you can safely fry. Many fryers claim that they can handle any bird up to 18 pounds, but I strongly recommend that you never try to fry any bird larger than 15 pounds, no matter what the manual says. Anything larger increases the risk of a spill-over exponentially. Besides, smaller turkeys fry better. Your better off frying 2 smaller turkeys rather than one large bird. Frying a turkey also requires the use of some specialized equipment, such as a fire-retardant apron, gloves, eye protection in the form of goggles, and a lot of oil. Is it worth it? Well,…several million people think so. And besides…, it’s fun and incredibly cool…

Know Your Equipment

One thing to keep in mind is that it is very important that you know your equipment, and understand how to use it properly and safely. Most mishaps involve people using their fryers for the first time. Be sure to read your Owner’s Manuals from cover to cover, or at least the parts that are written in your language. Make sure you understand how to properly assemble and use your unit. There are many great video tutorials on YouTube, absolutely free to watch. Take advantage of your learning resources. If you have a friend with experience in frying turkeys, it’s a really good idea to get them to supervise you on your first solo flight. Above all, think Safety First. If in doubt, always err on the side of caution. This is true for all types of cooking…

With that being said, let’s take a look at what kinds of equipment you may be using. Turkey fryers are pretty basic. There are two kinds; an outdoor fryer, which is the most popular, and an indoor type, which is basically a large deep fryer with a rotisserie attachment. Outdoor fryers are almost always propane-powered, while indoor fryers are invariably electric.

As you can see, an outdoor fryer consists of an aluminum pot to heat the oil in, and hold the turkey. They usually need around 5 gallons of oil. It has a lid, mostly for safety reasons, and two handles to facilitate moving the pot when necessary. The pot sits in a holder mounted above a propane burner, which is attached to a hose that runs to a standard propane tank, which is usually not included in the purchase, but can be found in almost any hardware store, as well as other places. There is sometimes a valve near the hose fitting that lets you adjust the propane gas flow, thus regulating the temperature. Or, you may just have to use the valve on the propane tank itself. Either way works fine. The entire unit is supported by 3 or 4 legs that hold everything up off of the ground to lessen the chance of starting a fire. Accessories will include a coat hanger-shaped wire rack, used to raise and lower the turkey into and out of the hot oil, and sometimes an oil thermometer. If not, you will definitely need to buy an oil thermometer, and it’s also a good idea to have a meat thermometer as well. We’ll get into those in the next section. As we said earlier, other things you will need are a fire retardant apron, gloves, goggles for eye protection, and a fire extinguisher rated for Class B fires (a large box of baking soda works well as a Type B extinguisher as well).

The advantages of outdoor fryers are that they cost a lot less than indoor fryers, are simple to use and maintain, and are safer, because any mishaps will be outside, and not in the house.

Indoor Turkey Fryers are pretty easy to use. All you have to do to heat them up is plug them in and set your temperature. They require less oil, because the turkey is only half-submerged, and they rotate while cooking so all sides get cooked evenly. Indoor fryers can use as little as 2-1/2 gallons of oil, maybe even less. They can also be used just like any other deep fryer to fry large amounts of french fries, chicken, fish, etc… They usually have a temperature control, and some even have timers. The spit spins the turkey slowly through the oil. The advantages of indoor fryers are ease of use, using less oil, and are less likely to start a fire in the event of a mishap. If you live up north, it may not be desirable to try to fry a turkey outside during a blizzard, snowstorm, rain, or very cold temperatures. An indoor fryer solves that problem.

Prepping For Frying

Before we get into the prep and frying part, the first thing to do is observe safety precautions. Before setting up your fryer, here are the things you should always do:

• The area should be under control at all times. Put your pets in the pen, or wherever, so that they cannot get into the area where you will be frying. Let the children play at a neighbors house, break out the video games, or whatever you need to do to make sure they stay away from the frying area.
• Always use protective gear when using the fryer.
• Never, never, never leave the fryer unattended when it is in operation, not even for a second. If you need to go to the restroom, or whatever, have someone spell you.
• Never use an outdoor fryer indoors, and vice versa. Never use an outdoor fryer in an enclosed space of any kind.
• Make sure the immediate area is free of anything that might be flammable, such as debris, paper, boxes, vegetation, paints and solvents, etc…. The area should be clear for at least 25 feet in all directions. This includes the house, and or garage, storage sheds, etc…
• Always have a fire extinguisher within reach while using the fryer.
• Make sure your turkey is completely thawed out and dry before lowering it into the oil. This is the #1 cause of turkey fryer mishaps. Any water will cause the oil to boil over into the burner, creating a spectacular flame up and fire show.
• Never fill your fryer with oil past the maximum oil marker. It is best to stay below the line.
• Alcohol and or drugs do not mix well with things that make flames or can explode. Leave the cocktails, beer, and wine for later, after you’ve earned it. If your prescription medications advise you not to drive while taking them, then don’t fry either. Let someone else do it, while you supervise… Make sure you are well rested, and don’t try to fry a turkey when you are sleepy. Be physically prepared, and alert.

Prepping for frying a turkey starts well before the actual frying, as much as 10 days in advance. The first thing to do is select a turkey. As we said earlier, smaller is better. A 15 pound bird is ideal. Whether you use a Hen or a Tom turkey is a matter of personal preference. Hens are smaller and have smaller bones, so they may be slightly preferable to Toms for frying.

A B-B-B-Bird, Bird, Bird. The Bird Is The Word…

All turkeys are not created equal. There is actually a very wide spread of quality available, ranging from what I consider to be marginally edible, to outstanding, and price is not always the indicating factor.

Whether you use a fresh or frozen turkey is up to personal preference and availability. Unfrozen turkeys are seldom available in time to properly prepare them for frying. They are usually only available right before the holidays, within a day or two. Heritage Turkeys must be ordered a year or more in advance, and are only killed and dressed when ready to be prepped and cooked. However, they have the best texture and flavor of any turkey you can buy, by a large margin. The best Heritage breeds are Narragansetts and Bourbon Reds. Wild Turkeys have to be harvested during the legal hunting seasons, but are superior to any other turkey in terms of taste, texture, and are perfectly sized for frying. The drawback is that they have less white meat than all other turkeys, but the dark meat is so good…who cares???

The next thing to consider is the way the turkey was processed. You have a few choices:

• Self-Basting, or Injected Turkeys: These birds have had vegetable oil and saline solutions injected into them during processing, supposedly to keep them moist during cooking, but actually, it is done to add preservatives, color enhancers and extra flavors to offset the blandness of the commercially raised turkey breeds. The meat texture is somewhat stringy. Since they are already injected, brining may give you a different and unexpected result. The only advantages to these are that they are cheap, and widely available.
• Natural Turkeys: By USDA Regulations, turkeys labeled as “Natural” have to be raised without the use of animal by-product feeds, must be free range, and never been given growth hormones, or antibiotics, except for external parasite control. They cannot be processed with any additives, preservatives, or extra flavorings whatsoever. These are only nominally more expensive than Self-Basting birds, and are much better in terms of flavor and texture.
• Organic Turkeys: By USDA Regulations, they must meet all the criteria for a “Natural” certification, and also be Free-Range. Free Range is sort of misleading as far as commercial turkeys go, for reasons I’ll explain shortly. Suffice to say you can ignore the “Free-Range” labeling on any commercial turkey.
• Heritage Turkeys: Top-of-the-Line for a purchased turkey, by any standard you want to set. These are very specific breeds, raised humanely, and actually are free roaming for their entire lives, have never been fed artificial, GMO, or processed feeds, antibiotics, hormones, and have no preservatives or artificial ingredients added during processing. They must be ordered at least a year in advance, as a rule, and are custom-raised to your specifications. They are only harvested at the last minute, when you are actually ready to prep them. The flavor and texture is superior to any other bird, save for a wild turkey you harvested yourself. They are leaner, and have less white meat than a commercial turkey, but the dark meat is superior in flavor to a commercial turkey’s white meat. They can cost upwards from around $6.00 per pound, but are more than worth it. Everyone should try a Heritage bird at least once in their lives…

*Note-A word about commercially bred turkeys: Any supermarket turkey you buy will be of one breed, and one breed only; the Broadbreasted White. They are so far removed from a real wild turkey that I don’t think they should be allowed to be called turkeys. They cannot breed with a wild turkey. These birds have been selectively bred to produce a turkey with the maximum amount of white meat possible. Their breasts are so large that they can’t even mate by themselves, and have to be artificially enseminated. As for “Free-Range”, Broadbraested Whites are so top-heavy that they can barely walk, so just because they left the pen door open, that doesn’t mean the turkey went out for a long stroll. Whites don’t ‘Range’ anywhere, and can barely waddle to the food dish. Without additives and flavorings, their meat is stringy and tasteless. If how the bird was raised and cared for is important to you, then your options are limited to Heritage or wild turkeys. I highly recommend Narragansetts and Bourbon Reds..outstanding birds.

Turkey Frying 101

We have our turkey. Now it’s time to go to work. If the turkey is frozen (most likely), we must thaw it out. Turkeys should be thawed in the refrigerator for at least 24 hours for every 4 pounds, so for a 15-lb. turkey, we are looking at 4 days to thaw. I will stress again, the turkey must be completely thawed before you attempt to fry it. Even ‘thawed’ or ‘previously-frozen” turkeys from the store are often still be frozen in the center, so they should also be thawed for at least a day, just to be sure.

This is going to sound really dumb, but the next thing to do is to remove the bag inside the body cavity that contains the liver, giblets, and the neck. It seems like common sense, but you would be surprised at how many people forget this and try to cook the turkey with the gut bag inside. It won’t ruin your turkey, but you will be the subject of many turkey jokes for years to come…. You can discard the parts, or re-freeze them to cook later in other things. The necks, in particular, make great turkey and rice or noodle soup, and the livers are wonderful fried by themselves, or wrapped in bacon and broiled. The giblets make outstanding gravy.

The next thing to do is to remove those dumb little plastic pop-outs, if your turkey has one. They are supposed to tell you when the turkey is done. They lie, and no decent cook needs a piece of plastic to tell them when a turkey is done. The plastic could melt during frying, or give off harmful chemicals when exposed to hot oil. Besides, they are just plain dumb and insulting.

Now we can get down to the important business of brining our bird. Nothing effects the outcome of your turkey as much as brining. It does more than just flavor the bird. It ensures that the moisture and flavorings become incorporated into each individual cell of the meat. You should always brine any meat you plan to roast, smoke or grill. The best way to do this is to get a food service bucket or large cooler, big enough to hold the turkey, and completely cover it with liquid and ice. Now, place the turkey in the container, and cover it with water. Next, remove the turkey and measure the water. This is how much brining liquid you will need. Be sure to adjust the water in the brine recipe to compensate for adding ice periodically. Make your brine according to your favorite recipe, and add it, and the turkey to your container. Top it off with as much ice as it will hold. Seal it with the lid. I allow 30 minutes per pound and it has always come out right, so for a 15 lb. turkey, allow at least 8 hours to brine. 12 hours is not too much, so overnight is fine. Check the ice every few hours and add more when necessary. Your turkey needs to stay in the 43º to 46º range while brining.

Once the brining is complete, remove the turkey from the brine, and discard the liquid. Do not ever use brine for anything after it has had raw meat in it. Next, rinse the bird very thoroughly inside and out, making sure to wash off all of the brine residue. Now, pat the bird completely dry inside and out. The drier the better. Place the bird in the refrigerator while you fire up the fryer. Be sure to use all the protective equipment and safety procedures. And most of all, make sure the turkey is secure when raising and lowering it, so as not to drop it into the oil.

If using an outdoor fryer, after you have gone through the safety checklist I previously mentioned, before you use any oil or apply any heat to the fryer, place the turkey in the fryer. Now, add enough oil to cover the bird, without going over the max fill line. If using an indoor fryer, follow the owners manual instructions for how much oil to add. Now, remove the bird, hold it over the pot and let as much oil drip off of if as possible. Some people use water to determine how much oil to use, but in my experience, you can never dry the pot back out enough by wiping it with a paper towel or cloth to be 100% sure it will not spit and splatter when the oil gets hot. My way is messier, but safer… Place the bird on a plate or tray and return it to the refrigerator or cooler until the oil is hot. You can wipe off the excess oil, or just leave it alone. It won’t hurt anything, but it may get your cooler messy.

*Note-A word about oils. For deep frying, I strongly suggest that you use nothing but either Cottonseed Oil or Peanut Oil. Cottonseed oil is the very best because it has no flavor or odor, an extremely high smoke point, and lasts longer than any other oil before breaking down or becoming rancid. Peanut oil has a very mild flavor and odor, a high smoke point, and last a good while before becoming unusable. All other oils have too low a smoke point, flame up easily, and break down in no time. Save the olive oil, coconut oil, vegetable oil, corn oil, etc… for pan frying and baking.

Now, according to your owners manual instructions, hook up your propane, light the burner and heat the oil to 350ºF, not 345ᵒ, not 365ᵒ, but 350ᵒ. Use a thermometer. When the oil gets hot, lower the turkey slowly into the oil, a little at a time. If the oil acts like it wants to boil up, raise the turkey a little until it calms back down. Once you have eased the turkey all the way in, unhook the handle. Allow the turkey to fry for about 3 minutes per pound, so a 15 lb. turkey will take around 45 minutes to fry. The turkey is done when the internal temperature reaches a minimum of 145ºF, but it’s not that critical. I have gone as high as 180ºF and the turkey was still fine. Turn off the burner and raise the turkey from the oil. Hold it over the pot for a few minutes and let the excess oil drain off. Your turkey is now perfect, and ready for presentation.

If using an indoor fryer, start by making sure the turkey is completely dry inside and out. Next, skewer the turkey on the spit. The bird must be secure on the spit, so the best way is to go through the breast just under the wishbone, and exit near one of the thighs. Now, you need to truss up all the loose parts like the wings and legs, so that they stay against the body, and not flop around while the bird is spinning. There are lots of ways to do this, so use your favorite method. I use kitchen string, and just tie everything against the body. Place the skewered and trussed turkey in the basket according to the manuals instructions. Give it a couple of spins to be sure nothing gets caught. If so, remove the turkey, fix it and try again. Once the turkey spins free, you are ready to fry. Fill the oil tank to the fill line or just below, and turn the unit on. When the oil reaches the correct cooking temperature, slowly lower the basket into the tank. From here, simply follow the manuals instructions. As a rule, allow 3 minutes per pound cooking time, so a 15 lb. bird will take about 45 minutes to cook. The bird is done when the internal temperature reaches a minimum of 145ºF. When the bird is done, turn off the rotisserie, raise the basket and place it in the drain holders so the oil can drain off the turkey. Turn off the unit.

Whichever fryer you use, your turkey is ready. Serve it however you want and enjoy. Once everything is cooled down, be sure to clean up and properly store everything. The oil can be stored and reused for up to 6 months. If you are disposing of it, please do it properly, and not just pour it out in the yard. It is very bad for the environment, Either place it into containers and take it to a recycling center, or put it in the trash. Never mix it with scented or disinfectant type kitty litters to solidify it. They can react with the oil and cause a spontaneous fire.

Conclusion

As long as proper procedures and safety precautions are followed, there is no reason why you can’t enjoy some delicious fried turkey this year. The extra work is more than worth it, and it is a lot of fun. Holidays only come around once a year, so make the most of it. Be a Frequent Fryer, and treat yourself, friends, family, neighbors, and whoever…to a memorable holiday feast this year.

Bon Apetit, and Happy Holidays…

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While you may not be able to outdo Grandma, you can certainly make an excellent ham with these helpful tips on how to shop, select, and prepare it. The result will be a ham that tastes far better than deli ham—one that reflects your personal touch.

1. Shopping. For the best prices, check newspaper ads. Many grocery stores use certain items as “loss leaders” to draw in customers. They know that once you’re in the store, you’ll likely buy other items, making up for the profits they lost on the ham. A common example of a loss leader is Thanksgiving Day turkeys for 28 cents a pound.
2. Selection. Your choices include boneless ham, bone-in ham, or even a spiral-cut ham. It’s important to test the ham for firmness. Press hard on several areas of the ham; soft spots indicate excess fat. You may not want a whole ham, so consider cuts with bone-in options, such as the shank or butt portions. The butt portion yields more of the center-cut slices, while the shank cut is great if you plan to use a flavorful hambone in a later dish. Both cuts will taste similar.
3. Cooking. Once the ham is selected, decide how to season it and what you’ll cook it in. For flavor, traditional options like maple, orange, or honey make excellent glazes.

Cook Your Ham in a Cooking Bag

You can cook a ham in any roasting pan that is at least 2 to 2-1/2 inches deep. If your pan doesn’t have a cover, aluminum foil can be used to tent the ham and keep its juices inside. Many people opt for cooking ham in a Reynolds cooking bag because it’s mess-free and requires little prep once the ham is in the oven. The only real work is setting the timer and checking the ham when the timer goes off. To cook with a bag, you’ll need to know the weight of the ham.
If using the cook-in-bag method, you’ll find a leaflet of instructions with a timetable for cooking per pound of meat. Be sure to select the correct bag size for the ham. Place three to four tablespoons of flour in the bottom of the bag, then place the ham inside and brush on your chosen glaze. Seal the bag and cut three slits at the top to prevent the bag from bursting as it expands in the oven.

Make sure the oven rack is low enough so the bag doesn’t touch the top or sides of the oven, as this could cause the bag to melt or stick.

Baked Ham: Traditional Cooking Method

If you prefer not to use the bag method, you can follow the traditional baking method instead.
Preheat the oven to 350°F. Place the ham in a deep enough baking dish or roasting pan to avoid overflowing juices during cooking. Brush the ham with your glaze, reserving some for basting every 30 minutes until the ham is done. After baking, remove the pan and let the ham cool at room temperature, making it easier to slice. Once cooled, transfer the ham to a serving platter and garnish with a few sprigs of parsley. Enjoy!

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Meat carries minor health risks. Pork and chicken may harbor parasites. Pork, historically linked to trichinosis—a disease from a nematode parasite—was once prohibited in many religious diets. Cooking pork to 160°F eliminates all foodborne pathogens and parasites. Chicken and ground beef can carry E. coli, often due to processing conditions, not the meat itself. Cooking to 160°F and maintaining proper kitchen hygiene neutralize this risk. Fish poses minimal parasite concerns, mostly mitigated by cooking, though rapid decomposition is a factor. Whole beef cuts, common in the U.S., have the lowest risk of foodborne illness. There’s a negligible cancer risk from heterocyclic amines and polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons—chemicals formed in burning—but it’s statistically less likely than winning the lottery. Mad Cow disease, a slight concern overseas, has never been reported in the U.S. Beef may carry *Toxoplasma gondii*, but with only about 300 annual cases, it’s a minor worry.

Safe Cooking Practices for Steak

Raw beef, like in steak tartare, carries a higher E. coli risk, typically from processing plants allowing fecal contamination. *E. coli*, a normal intestinal bacteria aiding digestion, becomes harmful when misplaced, causing issues like food poisoning. Strict food handling regulations prevent this, but occasional lapses lead to recalls. Cooking to 160°F kills *E. coli*. For whole cuts like steaks, any contamination is surface-level and easily washed off. For rare or medium-rare steaks (135°F–140°F internal temperature), rinse the meat thoroughly before cooking and wash your hands afterward. Chlorinated water can help.

A 2004 University of Nottingham study showed that rare beef, even intentionally contaminated with *E. coli*, was safe when cooked rare, provided utensils and surfaces were cleaned using standard kitchen practices. No surviving bacteria were found unless reintroduced by contaminated tools, like unwashed knives or tongs. This confirms rare steak is safe if hygiene is maintained.

An exhaustive search found no reputable evidence suggesting medium-rare steak poses unique health risks. So, fire up the grill, order that ribeye, sirloin, or T-bone cooked to your liking, and savor its exquisite taste and aroma without worry.

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True or false 1. The best meat for stew is stew meat.

True or false 2. To find a good quality pork chop, look for marbling within the meat.

True or false 3. If pork is two toned, it means there is something wrong with it.

True or false 4. If you cook one rib roast at 275 degrees and another at 400 degrees in’ the same oven at different times until they are cooked medium done, the’ roast cooked at the higher temperature will have the greater yield because’ it cooked in less time.

True or false 5. Since beef contains enough fat, there’s never a reason to use butter’ when cooking it.

True or false 6. If you turn a meat with a fork, you’ll lose all the juices during cooking.

True or false 7. Salting meat before you cook it will result in less moisture in the meat.

True or false 8. When grilling a steak, you should only turn it once. Otherwise, it will’ end up being dry.

True or false 9. An average-sized cow yields about 33 one-inch steaks. This is about’ 20% of the carcass.

True or false 10. The most tender steaks come from only the sirloin area.

• False. Stew meat usually consists of scraps too small to be steaks. These scraps are from all parts of the cow. Your best bet for stew meat is to use a pot roast and cut it up into bite-sized chunks. Other good choices for stew meat are a rump roast, cross rib, chuck roast or bottom round.
• True. Without marbling, pork will be dry. Too much marbling, however, will not be a good sign either; look for a happy medium.
• False. It’s natural for some muscles of the pig to be darker than others. The tenderloin is almost always darker in color than the loin on top of the T-bone. Look for a nice pink-gray color on the top loin cuts.
• False. In one study, the percentage of weight lost for the roast cooked at 275 degrees was 12.1 while the roast cooked at 400 degrees was 29.1. This is pretty significant and can result in money lost out of your food budget.
• False. Adding a teaspoon of butter to the top of a steak sizzling on the plate puts flavor back into lean beef and adds a little flavor to choice cuts as well. Seasoning the butter with herbs beforehand adds even more flavor to the meat.
• False. Some meat juices may be lost, but the juices are found throughout the meat, not just in one location.
• False. Unless you’re packing several pounds of salt around the meat and giving it time to dry out, flavoring your meat with salt before cooking it won’t do anything except make it taste a little better.
• Questionable. Some experts say that you should only turn the meat once during cooking while others say turn it as often as you wish. Test this one for yourself and decide what your answer is from experience.
• True.
• False. Tender steaks are also from the short loin and the rib section. The short loin yields porterhouse steaks, t-bone steaks and also club steaks.

How did you do on the meat facts all men should know? A score of 7 or more is a great score, 5 to 6 is good, and less than 5 means it’s time to read more about meats!

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What is the attraction of this culinary anomaly? It could be that it has a very distinguished history, beginning with the Mayans, Aztecs and Incas. The recipe was refined on the streets of San Antonio, Texas, long before it was a state, with the legendary “Chili Queens’  offering their delicious, and hot creations to passers-by. Chili was a mainstay on Texas cattle drives, and anyone who knows anything about chili is familiar with the famous Chason’s Chili. Actress Elizabeth Taylor was so fond of Chasen’s Chili that she had it shipped to her in Egypt while shooting the epic movie Cleopatra, and it was actor Clark Gables final meal (what a send-off…). It could be the fact that the active ingredient in all peppers, capsaicin, when ingested, causes a release of endorphins (hormones that create a pleasurable feeling), providing you survive the initial shock. Or it could be all the fun associated with Chili Cook-Offs.

Whatever the reasons, chili has the most loyal following of any food in the world, sharing the # 1 spot with barbecue.  Cooking chili is a full-time hobby for some, and many a person has set out on a quest to find the perfect chili. Humorist Will Rogers even kept notes on different restaurants and their chilis with his own rating system. Fights have started over a simple question such as “Is it OK to use beans and tomatoes?”  People are fiercely attached to their opinions on chili.

To understand chili, you need to understand the peppers used to create it. The most common peppers used are Anchos, Polanos, Anahiems, and Jalapenos. In addition, blends of peppers are used to create the main spice used, Chili Powder. Peppers are not a vegetable, but a fruit in the Capsicum family. Most of the heat is contained in the veins and seeds of peppers, so discarding these will tone your chili down somewhat, if you are squeamish. The active ingredient in peppers, capsaicin, has many medical uses. It relieves pain, lowers blood pressure, and used as a compress, will stop bleeding rapidly on most cuts. It can clear sinuses, and is a great topical treatment for arthritis, and other chronic painful conditions. Capsaicin has a positive effect on cholesterol levels, digestion, and has even been shown to have a positive effect in the treatment of prostrate cancer.

Capsaicin differs from other ‘hot’ spices like ginger and black pepper, in that regular consumption results in a person developing a tolerance for the heat, allowing one to eat ever hotter peppers, and earning the coveted title of “Chili-Head”.  Developing a tolerance for the capsicum allows you to explore the wonderful nuances of the different peppers, each with its own flavor profile. This is why smokin’ hot chili is so exciting.

Peppers are rated by the Scoville System, developed by Wilber Scoville in 1912. The scale is in units of 100, and goes from 0 (the mildest) to over 16,000,000 units (pure capsaicin).

Here are some common ratings:

• Bell, Banana, and Pimento Peppers-0
• Hungarian Paprika-200
• Poblanos, Anchos-2000
• Anahiems-2500
• Guajillos-5000
• Jalapeños-9000
• De Arbols-30,000
• Tabasco, Cayenne-50,000
• Piquins-58,000
• Thai-100,000

And lastly, the king of peppers, the Infinity Chili-1,176,182… Salute!!!

• Pepper Spray-3,000,000
• Police Grade Pepper Spray-5,300,000

No discussion of peppers would be complete without a mention of the outstanding Infinity Chili Pepper. This was developed by accident by a former RAF Security Guard, Nick Woods. By cross-breeding different species of chiles, he came up with the hottest pepper known to man, the Infinity. ¼ of one pepper is more than enough to flavor a large pot of chili. Now, Mr. Woods markets sauces using his chiles at  https://www.firefoods.co.uk. His products are well worth the effort to try. I use his Infinity Chili Sauce regularly. My next favorite sauce is El Yucateco, which is also hideously hot.

I will leave you with my favorite smokin’ hot chili recipe, that I have won several awards for. It is not the absolute hottest, but plenty hot enough to satisfy even the most die-hard Chili Heads. It is easy to prepare.

Smokin’ Hot Chili Recipe

Joel’s “Manhattan Project” Chili.
(In WW-II, the ‘Manhattan Project’ was the code name for the ultra Top Secret program to develop the world’s first nuclear device…Fat Man.)

Around 3 quarts of water.
1 can of beer
3 pounds ground beef, or chuck
2 cans of chili beans, juice and all
2 cans of chili-spiced tomatoes (or Snappy Tom tomatoes with green chiles), juice and all
2 large onions, chopped
6 canned jalepeno peppers, chopped, with 1/3 cup of the pepper juice
8 Tbsp hot Chili Powder
4 Tbsp Instant Beef Stock
5 Tbsp ground Cumin
1 Tbsp Basil
1 Tsp Oregano, steeped in ¼ cup hot water
20 drops of Yucateco Green, Red or Mayan, Habanero Sauce, or 5 drops of Infiniti Chile Sauce.
Salt and Pepper to taste

Place oregano in ¼ cup of hot water, and set aside. In a large pot, brown the ground beef. Add the onions and peppers and sauté until the onions are translucent. Add beans, tomatoes, oregano, spices, water and stock. Adjust liquid if needed. Allow the chili to come to a low boil, and lower heat. Add all the hot sauce and simmer until desired consistency is reached, at least 20-30 minutes, stirring occasionally to prevent sticking.

Serve with lots of tortillas and hot sauce.

Note-to cut calories and cholesterol, substitute ground turkey for the ground beef. It will not change the taste or consistency at all.

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The Pinot Noir grape is a variety of the species Vitis vinifera, which includes all grape varieties. It is a very ancient species, genetically only a generation or two removed from the wild grape species it descended from. Its exact origins are lost to antiquity, but it seems to have been grown in the Burgundy region of France for as long as history can determine. It was first described in writing in the 1st century in Columella’s De re Rustica. Some speculate that the grape was originally cultivated in northern Belgium before being transported to France by the Roman legions.

The Challenges of Growing Pinot Noir

Pinot Noir is a varietal red wine made from the Pinot Noir grape. The name comes from two French words meaning “pine” and “black.” It likely got this name because the grapes grow in tight clusters that resemble pine cones, and the fruit itself is dark purple.

Pinot Noir grapes thrive in cooler regions worldwide, but the most famous examples come from the Burgundy region in France. While Pinot Noir produces some of the finest wines available, it is very difficult to cultivate, and making wine from these grapes challenges even the most expert winemakers. It is a very unforgiving grape.

The leaves of Pinot Noir are smaller than those of Cabernet Sauvignon but larger than those of Syrah. The plants produce narrow trunks and branches, and they are extremely sensitive to light exposure, crop density (they must be kept at low yields), soil types, pruning techniques, and many other factors. The fruit has a thin skin, making it very susceptible to bunch rot and other fungal diseases, as well as damage from insects, birds, and other animals. The vines are particularly vulnerable to downy mildew, leaf roll, fan leaf, and other ailments. These factors make Pinot Noir one of the most difficult grape varieties to successfully cultivate.

When the grapes are harvested, the challenge is far from over. In the winery, the grapes are as touchy as nitroglycerin. They are super-sensitive to fermentation methods, yeast strains, temperature, light, and humidity, and are highly reflective of their terroir (the regional characteristics of the land). Grapes grown in different regions can produce completely different flavors. Making Pinot Noir wine is truly a labor of love.

So, why go to all this trouble when there are many more forgiving varieties available? Simply because, when all is said and done, Pinot Noir produces some of the finest wines in the world. The extremely wide variety of bouquets, textures, flavors, and impressions can fool even veteran wine tasters. In the broadest sense, Pinot Noir wines tend to be light to medium-bodied. The bouquet can be best described as somewhat fruity, with notes of black cherry, currants, and raspberries, while at the same time offering earthy undertones. Traditional red Burgundy wine, which is 100% Pinot Noir from the Burgundy region (specifically the Cote d’Or), is typically fleshy with “farmyard” overtones. Pinot Noir wines generally have fewer tannins and more acidity than other red wines. The color is usually lighter than most other reds, but a more powerful style has emerged from California and New Zealand that is darker and can rival Syrah in depth of flavor. Pinot Noir is also a staple in champagne production, usually blended with Chardonnay.

The Pinot Noir grape is highly prone to hybridization, giving rise to many close cousins. This can make it more confusing to determine what exactly constitutes Pinot Noir wine. Its offspring include Pinot Gris, Pinot Blanc, Pinot Moure, Pinot Tienturier, Pinot Fin, Pinot Meunier, Pinot Tordu, Pinot Gouges, Pinot Musigny, Pinot Liebault, and even an English variety, the Wrotham Pinot. Like Pinot Noir, these varieties are all prone to regional differentiation and can be used in blends, as long as the wine is predominantly Pinot Noir.

Selecting a bottle of Pinot Noir can be difficult. For this type of wine, the region of production is the most important factor to consider. More than with any other grape, Pinot Noir serves as a conduit for the soul of the soil from which it was born. The difference between one bottle and another lies in the soil and the winemaker’s artistry. The finest Pinot Noirs unquestionably come from the Cote d’Or in Burgundy, but there are also excellent Pinot Noirs from California, Australia, Austria, Germany (where it is called Spätburgunder), Canada, Romania, and other cool-weather regions around the world.

Generally speaking, Pinot Noir wines pair wonderfully with poultry, beef, pork, fish, ham, lamb, and game meats, depending on the wine’s terroir. It works well with creamy sauces, spicy dishes such as pasta with marinara, or even enchiladas. It is arguably one of the most versatile wines there is.

Pinot Noir is typically consumed young, within a year of production. Aging can mellow the fruitiness and bring out more earthy flavors, but due to the “touchy” nature of the grape, long aging is risky. Five years is the recommended limit.

Now, you no longer have to ask yourself, “What type of wine is Pinot Noir?” You are one of the few, the proud, the informed. The next time you’re out with someone and trying to select a wine, you can impress the room with your newfound brilliance and knowledge. Pinot Noir wines are some of the finest in the world, so treat yourself to a bottle now and then—you deserve it!

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While the practice of wine-tasting and keeping notes has existed as long as wine itself, the numerical systems of rating wines are a relatively recent development. Modern, rapid bulk transport of perishable items—namely wine—has made many wines from all over the world available to consumers. By the mid-20th century, the U.S. demand for foreign wines had grown significantly. Wine critics, seeing an opportunity, decided they could be of use to consumers trying to find the right wine. In the 1970s, world-renowned wine expert Robert Parker devised a rating system based on the American Standard Grading System of 0-100 points. The system became very popular, and other systems soon followed. This was a boon for the wine industry, as highly rated wines could be sold for more money. A relationship developed between wine producers and wine critics. The system helped wine-buyers select wines without having to try them first and allowed wine retailers to use ratings as a marketing tool—without having to sample the wine.

Retailers could select their stock based on ratings, concentrating on the higher-scoring wines. Restaurants also benefited greatly from this system, with some even forgoing the use of a sommelier and relying on ratings instead.

Different Wine Rating Systems

The most significant rating systems in the U.S. are the ones used by The Wine Enthusiast, Wine Spectator Magazine, and The Wine Advocate. Most wines will only differ slightly in their ratings across these systems, so the relative numbers remain valid. However, each system may use different guidelines, and the ratings ultimately come down to the personal tastes of the wine-taster. Criteria such as taste, aroma, body, and character are common across the systems. These are the ratings you’ll most often encounter in magazines, articles, and even on wine lists in upscale restaurants.

The Wine Advocate’s (www.erobertparker.com) System

This system is based on the personal rating style of legendary wine expert Robert Parker and ranges from 50 (mouthwash) to 100 (extraordinary).

• 96-100: Extraordinary—free of any flaws.
• 90-95: Outstanding—robust and complex.
• 80-89: Good—not great, but good.
• 70-79: Average—OK if you’re on a budget. Well-made, but nothing to brag about.
• 60-69: Below Average—lacking in both flavor and character, but better than nothing.
• 50-59: Unacceptable—only suitable for mouthwash and embalming fluid.

The Wine Spectator’s (www.winespectator.com) System

Wine Spectator is one of the most respected rating systems internationally.

• 95-100: Classic—no flaws of any kind. Absolutely perfect.
• 90-94: Outstanding—miniscule flaws that only a skilled wine expert would notice.
• 85-89: Very Good—few flaws that an average wine drinker would not notice.
• 80-84: Good—solid, well-made wines.
• 70-79: Average—drinkable, but lacking in some areas.
• 60-69: Below Average—drinkable, but not recommended.
• 50-59: Poor—not exactly toxic, but best avoided.

Wine Enthusiast’s (wineenthusiast.com) System

• 98-100: Classic—perfect in every aspect.
• 94-97: Superb—perfect in almost every way. Very minor glitches.
• 90-93: Excellent—highly recommended.
• 87-89: Very Good—very few flaws.
• 83-86: Good—acceptable everyday wines. Most good table wines fall into this category.
• 80-82: Drinkable but not great—OK for serving to people you don’t want to stay very long.

You need to remember that these ratings are all subjective. Everyone has different likes and dislikes, and many will not agree with these ratings. That’s the key to understanding wine ratings.

Wine tasting is a highly arbitrary undertaking. Wine experts often cannot agree on standardized criteria, and in many cases, their ratings for the same wine will change depending on their mood. Needless to say, the rating systems have their share of critics. Like umpires and referees, wine experts face criticism from “armchair” wine-tasters worldwide. There are frequent accusations of politics and favoritism. The professional wine community is very tight-knit, so it is not unreasonable to speculate that politics may play a small part in some ratings—especially when the industry depends on goodwill. Personally, I believe it’s more a matter of personal preferences that can vary from one day to another. Wine experts are just as human as everyone else, regardless of popular opinion.

Another major criticism of these rating systems is that they influence the globalization of wine and downplay the importance of terroir and regional character. Critics claim that the systems push winemakers to produce wines that are more homogenous and appealing to international critics. There’s a fear that these ratings drive the market toward wines that score highly, at the expense of more modest, but perfectly good wines.

If movie ratings in the U.S. are any comparison, I think these fears are overblown. Despite the ratings, most of Hollywood’s offerings in the past few decades (and many TV networks) have been, in my opinion, sensationalistic garbage. But that’s just me. There will always be a market for inexpensive, less-than-perfect wines. Low ratings certainly haven’t hurt the sales of Mad Dog 20/20, Boone’s Farm, or Thunderbird wines. Look in any convenience store where wine and beer are sold.

In the end, wine ratings are a good guideline—one tool among many—for selecting a wine. But remember, these ratings are not written in stone. They’re not law. You should always trust your own palate. With a little research, it’s not that hard to understand wine ratings.

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A lot of people have pondered the question: Capped vs. Corked Wine: Is There A Difference? One of the reasons caps came into being is a phenomenon called cork-taint contamination. Approximately 1 out of every 10 bottles of wine is ruined by this issue. It’s caused by a chemical known as trichloroanisole (TCA). This chemical forms when chlorine, used to sterilize the bottles, reacts with mold already present on the cork. The result? A musty, dull taste and other unpleasant characteristics. Human taste buds are incredibly sensitive to TCA, detecting it at concentrations as low as six parts per million. The main cause of this issue is that manufacturers are finding it increasingly hard to source quality cork to meet the demand, as more wine is sold today than ever before in history.

In the 1970s, in an effort to combat tainted corks, a French company called Pechiney Capsules created a special type of screw-cap for wine bottles known as the Stelvin model. Initially marketed for cheap wines, it didn’t gain much attention until the design was upgraded. The basic design includes a metal cap with a printable skirt and a non-reactive liner that comes into contact with the wine. The liner design has been upgraded into two models: one with a Saranex liner made of polyethylene and PVC, designed for wines that will age up to 10 years; and another with a Saran Film Etian liner, which includes a thin layer of tin between PVC and polyethylene. This design allows even less oxygen to enter and is used for wines that can age for 50 years or more. The caps completely eliminate any risk of tainted corks, and more high-quality wines are being capped instead of corked these days.

The Growth of Stelvin Caps in the Wine Industry

Stelvin cap sales have doubled in recent years, especially in Australia and New Zealand, as well as in traditional French wine regions like Bordeaux, Burgundy, and Alsace. It’s estimated that capped wines make up about 10% of the total wine market, with the number continuing to grow. Since other spirits are normally sold in capped bottles, the transition to bottling wine with caps is an easy one. No special processes or materials are required, and caps are much easier to sterilize than corks. They’re also easier to install.

Some critics argue that wine needs slow oxygenation to age properly, while supporters of caps insist that the wine contains enough oxygen in the neck space and in the wine itself to facilitate this process. Moreover, the majority of wines are consumed young. Other advantages of caps include that they are much easier to open, don’t require tools like a corkscrew, pose no risk of cork particles falling into the wine, and reseal the bottle much better after opening. However, traditionalist winemakers argue that aging is a process where sulfur compounds develop under a lack of oxygen, meaning caps are only suitable for new white wines. Others disagree just as fervently.

What do wine aficionados think about caps? The consensus seems to be… there is no consensus. Blind tastings have been inconclusive, with many tasters actually preferring capped wine. Some tasters believe capped wine initially produces subtle oaken tones that quickly dissipate. After allowing the wine to breathe in the glass, the differences between corked and capped wines seem to disappear. In fact, when the wine is capped and allowed to breathe, there doesn’t seem to be much difference, even with aged wines.

Of course, there will always be die-hard traditionalists who believe that using corks is a major part of the wine experience. The ritual of ‘popping the cork’ is deeply ingrained in the mystique of wine. Only time will tell if the cap will ever become a regular part of the experience. For many, a bottle of wine must have a cork—anything else is blasphemy. The tradition of the cork ‘popping,’ followed by the slow and sensual pour of the exquisitely scented beverage into a polished glass, cannot be replaced by the sight and sound of a threaded cap being unscrewed by hand.

Tradition or not, if you’ve ever tasted a bottle of tainted wine, you’ll gain a whole new appreciation for caps.

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Og also realized that growing plants closer to the cave would make his life easier, thus inventing gardening. This was too much for the Neanderthals, who despised anything healthy and moved away, never to be heard from again. Meanwhile, Og began planting beans, as they were abundant, easy to grow, and tasty. Beans also provided entertainment with their weird sounds a few hours after eating them, leading to the creation of the first joke: “Pull my finger.” By mixing the green plants with beans, Og created an endless variety of foods, which became known as “salads,” in honor of his nickname. The rest, as they say, is history.

In reality, beans were among the first crops cultivated. Evidence suggests that peas were grown in Thailand as early as 9750 BC, and beans were cultivated in Mexico and the Americas over 8,000 years ago. Even beans were found in Egyptian pyramids over 4,000 years old, still edible. Beans became an integral part of the human diet across the globe. Early farmers also started growing grains, which were easy to store. Combining grains with beans provided a complete source of protein, lessening humanity’s dependence on meat. Native Americans have long planted squash, beans, and corn together—known as “the three sisters.” It’s likely that various bean salads were made and enjoyed early on, but it wasn’t until the 19th century that official written recipes for bean salads emerged.

Common Types of Beans Used in Salads

To make a bean salad, it’s helpful to know about the different types of beans available. There are thousands of species, so listing all of them would be impractical, but here are some of the most common beans used in salads:

• Pintos – A medium-sized, brown-speckled bean with a creamy texture and earthy flavor. Great in salads, soups, or chili.
• Black Beans – Small, black beans with a musky, earthy flavor. Common in Latin cuisine and perfect for Mexican salads.
• Navy/Great Northern Beans – These tan-colored beans have a buttery taste and are great with ham, in soups, or in salads.
• Green Beans – A veggie favorite with a slightly sweet taste and a soft, woodsy texture. They work in soups, casseroles, or salads.
• Adzuki Beans – Small, reddish beans with a sweet taste and delicate texture. Best for Asian dishes.
• Anasazi Beans – Two-toned red and cream beans, sweet and meaty in flavor. Can substitute for pinto beans.
• Black-Eyed Peas – Cream-to-brown beans with a black ‘eye.’ They have a soft, creamy texture and earthy taste, often paired with pork.
• Chickpeas/Garbanzos – Small, nutty beans popular in Italian and Mediterranean salads and for making hummus.
• Kidney Beans/Red Beans – Used in Red Beans and Rice and other dishes, these beans absorb surrounding flavors well.
• Fava Beans – Large, creamy beans with a buttery, earthy flavor. Great in salads or soups.
• Lima/Butter Beans – Large, creamy beans with a buttery texture, similar to fava beans but sharper in taste.
• Yellow/Maricopa Beans – These beautiful golden beans have a unique flavor, somewhere between pinto and black-eyed peas. They’re addictive in soups, salads, or with tortillas.
• Split Peas – Greenish peas with a sweet flavor, best in soups but can also be used in salads.
• Mung Beans – Sprouted for use in salads, soups, or on sandwiches, they have a crunchy texture and earthy flavor.
• Lentils – Small, firm beans that come in red, brown, or green. They have a woodsy flavor and work well in salads, soups, or casseroles.

The key to a great bean salad is cooking your beans properly. There are only two acceptable methods: boiling or pressure-cooking. Microwaving beans is a mistake that should be avoided. Most beans require pre-soaking (overnight or the “fast-soak” method) to cook properly, except for lentils, green beans, split peas, and field peas, which can be cooked immediately. To soak your beans, place them in a large container with at least two inches of water to cover them. Inspect the beans before soaking and discard any bad ones or rocks.

Cooking Beans

For boiling beans, sauté any onions, garlic, carrots, celery, green peppers, or bacon you want to add, then cook them with the beans. The water-to-bean ratio should be 2:1. Cook the beans for at least two hours, checking after 90 minutes. Keep an eye on the liquid level, adding more as needed. Whether or not to add salt is a matter of preference, though many people add it after cooking.

Pressure cooking is the best method for cooking beans. It preserves their nutrients, flavor, and texture. You can skip the soaking process, and in about 45 minutes, your beans will be perfectly cooked. Electric pressure cookers are especially convenient, allowing you to set them in the morning and come back to perfectly cooked beans.

Once your beans are cooked and cooled, you can start preparing your bean salad masterpiece. There are no fixed rules, but here are a few standard recipes to get you started:

White Bean and Tuna Salad (Serves 2-4)
16 oz. cooked Navy or Great Northern Beans (canned is okay)
5-6 oz. canned tuna in oil (sardines work well, too)
1 cup chopped parsley
1/4 cup diced onions (green or red)

For the dressing:

3 tbsp Extra-Virgin Olive Oil
2 tbsp lemon juice
Salt and pepper to taste
Rinse the beans in cold water and drain. Whisk together the olive oil, lemon juice, salt, and pepper. Toss the beans with the dressing, allowing them to marinate. Add tuna, parsley, and onion, then toss gently. Serve with crackers or fresh bread.

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